TDS Unresolved Trauma with Drug Use?

[malakaix]

I'm beginning to feel i have unresolved trauma related to drug use.

Whenever the topic of drugs comes up in conversation i become anxious, especially if i become involved in the conversation. The anxiety is really overwhelming like a feeling of 'losing control' which i think is strongly related to my excessive use of psychedelic drugs, years ago. I haven't used any drugs in over a year.. but whenever the topic comes up or im indirectly around them my anxiety goes through the roof and i literally feel almost 'out of body'. I'm not sure if im flashing back to a more traumatic time in my life where my psyche was more fragmented and this brings up feelings of fear of losing control but its concerning me.. this also occurs in any environment where i would take drugs.. music festivals, raves/doofs, house parties, even friends i would take drugs with..

I guess the simple answer is to just move on from the drug culture and associated people; but am i really dealing with it or am i just running away from the issue? I'm pretty OCD when it comes to personal problems and i try everything i can to resolve them, but im confused about this.. even typing this post out is making me feel anxious.

Its like im trying to block out or forget a part of my life that involved heavy drug use.

 

[Jnk]

Dealing with it in this case is running away from the issue because your issues are triggers, they trigger drug seeking behavior , I am going through a similar thing myself right now.
I hope it gets better for you soon. Only block it out enough to remember the trauma and trouble it caused you, so you don't make the same mistakes again. At least this way, if you are
anxious or ashamed of your use, you learned something from the whole journey.

 

[neversickanymore]

Feeling out of control is good as it indicates the true nature. The conscious mind is only a tool for the real driver.. the real driver seems to like drugs immensely and would naturally sit up and take notice when the conversation came to that.. even to shut the conscious rite down as it knows their views now clash on the subject..

EDIT: we never forget anything.. ever.

 

[malakaix]

Hey thank-you for clarifying

I guess i can use the anxiety to my advantage, it's only when i stopped using drugs due to emotional instability that i realized how much i do seem to seek them out whenever i'm in a party atmosphere, almost like a necessity; and now that im trying not to when im around them or the topic arises i become anxious and hesitant.

 

[RedLeader]

I only get like this with stimulants. But when I do, it's BAD. Reminds me of all of the dumb stuff I said/did under their influence.

 

[villian]

EDIT: we never forget anything.. ever.

I can't speak for anyone else, but as some people do. Some days it seems I have forgotten more about my life experiences than I remember due

 

[mrflowers00]

try seeing a psychologist