goodnitestar
Bluelighter
Wrenching my body at three in the morning
straining blind dry eyes to read a clock to tell me
what i should be doing now
its a saturday night, get up and do something
you already fucked up your friday
i can hear some kids a few apartments down through my bedroom window...my bedroom , i shouldnt be here, unless im having sex, or ,changing clothes, or passing out from intoxication
and i am a bit of that, but not enouph for this
when was the last time you made plans to do anything?
when was the last time you spent forever getting ready just to end up wearing the same UFO skirt ~ white shirt and tie? Just to prove you were that girl who didnt need to show off her body.... Staying out till the sun came up over the city of Pittsburgs bridges
Oh how I loved that place most then, when I was so exhasted from dancing, yet so alive, washing my face at the donut shop, where all the homeless folks would be waiting for their turn in the only place they could hope for a bathroom, and heading home at eight in the morning. Happy and fullfilled from all that had been a weekend.
That was before i met you , that was the last time i remeber being free to go everywhere, without concern for company, or love. always alone,but happy ~ then i met you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And it was nice, for once, the first time in my entire life, i had my own circle of freinds, and I was truly in love, and loved in return , and I still am, just without the return
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
it was beauty it was joy, peace in rivers
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And now Its Over , now , too CLEAR when I am just a screen name, ignored,just a old picture, a phone number you scribble in your book, but never call. And I dont just lose a lover, I lost all that came with him, more pain in this I aquire, for freinds are supposed to be forever.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
AND THIS person is just a memory
a thought every three months
"I wonder how she's doing" and deep down the deception is they all think your insane...
CAUSE ONE PERSON CAN TELL two lies, change a persons perception about you
without consideration for truth......
NO ONE comes to you, with a question or concern
just a slash comes ripping through your name, and nothing is ever the same.
AND A FAIRWEATHER FREIND, is all that they are,
its raining over your head, and not a damn ray of sunshine comes, not ever.
In their minds your a constant weather pattern
and not one is willing to get wet, and no one wants to jump in the puddles and play along, or even peep out the window and check to see if the weather man wasnt right, and see that the sun is shinning, and its a beautiful day
AND THEY do they all change, from a "smile and a hug" to a "hello" infered "dont come any closer, im not sure I remember you"
[ 22 September 2002: Message edited by: goodnitestar ]
[ 25 September 2002: Message edited by: goodnitestar ]
[ 25 September 2002: Message edited by: goodnitestar ]
straining blind dry eyes to read a clock to tell me
what i should be doing now
its a saturday night, get up and do something
you already fucked up your friday
i can hear some kids a few apartments down through my bedroom window...my bedroom , i shouldnt be here, unless im having sex, or ,changing clothes, or passing out from intoxication
and i am a bit of that, but not enouph for this
when was the last time you made plans to do anything?
when was the last time you spent forever getting ready just to end up wearing the same UFO skirt ~ white shirt and tie? Just to prove you were that girl who didnt need to show off her body.... Staying out till the sun came up over the city of Pittsburgs bridges
Oh how I loved that place most then, when I was so exhasted from dancing, yet so alive, washing my face at the donut shop, where all the homeless folks would be waiting for their turn in the only place they could hope for a bathroom, and heading home at eight in the morning. Happy and fullfilled from all that had been a weekend.
That was before i met you , that was the last time i remeber being free to go everywhere, without concern for company, or love. always alone,but happy ~ then i met you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And it was nice, for once, the first time in my entire life, i had my own circle of freinds, and I was truly in love, and loved in return , and I still am, just without the return
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
it was beauty it was joy, peace in rivers
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And now Its Over , now , too CLEAR when I am just a screen name, ignored,just a old picture, a phone number you scribble in your book, but never call. And I dont just lose a lover, I lost all that came with him, more pain in this I aquire, for freinds are supposed to be forever.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
AND THIS person is just a memory
a thought every three months
"I wonder how she's doing" and deep down the deception is they all think your insane...
CAUSE ONE PERSON CAN TELL two lies, change a persons perception about you
without consideration for truth......
NO ONE comes to you, with a question or concern
just a slash comes ripping through your name, and nothing is ever the same.
AND A FAIRWEATHER FREIND, is all that they are,
its raining over your head, and not a damn ray of sunshine comes, not ever.
In their minds your a constant weather pattern
and not one is willing to get wet, and no one wants to jump in the puddles and play along, or even peep out the window and check to see if the weather man wasnt right, and see that the sun is shinning, and its a beautiful day
AND THEY do they all change, from a "smile and a hug" to a "hello" infered "dont come any closer, im not sure I remember you"
[ 22 September 2002: Message edited by: goodnitestar ]
[ 25 September 2002: Message edited by: goodnitestar ]
[ 25 September 2002: Message edited by: goodnitestar ]
