TRYING TO STOP THE METH MONSTE

[AlmaPerdida87]

Hi I'm a 33 yr father of 3 and married to a wonderful woman. I have peeped around blue light for quite a while and now I'm posting. My DOC is heroin of which I've been on methadone ( MMT) since 11/23/15.. but I found meth about 2 years into treatment. I can't seem to beat the lack of energy and no motivation to do ANYTHING... I feel like everything sucks and that I'm incapable of being a father or husband when I'm trying to kick this shit.... but I'm not happy with who I am when I'm using. Need help and any advice on how long I will feel like that.

 

[Bluatom]

Good luck getting that demons slayed mate.
I've managed to steer clear of some of the nasties that friends have got into. Tbh the drug I've found hardest to beat is tobacco. Been on and off it (ok, almost exclusively ON) since I was 14 yrs old...

 

[dlinuc]

It’s hard mate, not going to lie to you.
I went off, then back on, then off soooooo many times I can’t remember.

Then one day I just said fuck it and stopped. Got into fitness really intensely and made it my new obsession.

It worked. And just know that something will work for you. It honestly will.
Your will power is actually a lot stronger than what you think it is!

 

[AlmaPerdida87]

Thank you so much it's just really refreshing to find a place that isnt " treatment " or some court ordered shit and actually find other ppl who are essentially going through what I am and get their perspective. I genuinely like who I am when I'm sober. And by sober I mean only continuing in methadone maintenance and no other substances. I like the freedom of not having to live in a constant cycle of sick- cop- nod- sick for even longer - takes more and more self destructive measures to cop- nod- repeat.... and meth is essentially another prison of my design. More than anything my trigger is the anhedonia and lack of energy and my family life goes to shit so I feel like fuck it I might as well bump up because thay shit is hell but when I bump I'm not happy either. Anyway sorry for the rant. I appreciate the words. Thanks

 

[nuttynutskin]

Don't have any great advice other than maybe try some exercise if you aren't already. That, and "this too shall pass". Just might take a while for your brain to readjust depending on how much you were using. Good luck!