lostNfound
Bluelight Crew
- Joined
- Mar 20, 2005
- Messages
- 13,675
This a true story about a prawn.
If I acted on all the silly ideas I came up with every day, week, month, year then my lifetime would be a total shenanigans. Every once in a while, I have to act on one of these desires, and this desire involved an airport security scanner and a prawn.
One day over a concoction of an undisclosed amount of amphetamines many many beers and a wild tripe talk tangent, the idea of the prawn developed.
It would be most genius to carry a fresh an uncooked prawn into the airport, and and at the security check point where bags are scanned and pockets are emptied and all items are placed in trays on the conveyor belt, prawny as he came to be known, would also be placed for scanning.
Why you may ask, why not I say? For the hilarity, of for the hilarity.
It would be months before the plan would actually fall into place.
A number months back, I had to make a trip the airport to pick up an arriving passenger, of whom I should have been excited to so, but this was not the case. For I had remembered the plan.
PRAWNY
On the way to the airport, I took a detour via the seafood shop and went to the counter and asked for one kingsize prawn please.
I chose the best looking one there, knowing he was about to be on show.
I had brought with me a snap lock bag to keep prawny in safely.
The excitement was building, the plan was in action.
Now I had about a fifteen minute car ride to the airport.
Fifteen minutes of suspense.
I found a carpark as close as I could knowing prawny had little time to stay looking fesh.
I had him in my snap lock bag and kept him there until I made my way to the security check point, where I took him from the snap lock freshness.
Carefully, I placed him in the pocket of my jeans.
I approached the checkpoint and grabbed a tray and was asked to empty my pockets and place all items and metal objects in there.
In order, i took off my belt, grabbed my wallet, mobile phone, car keys and placed them all in the tray.
Prawny was in the last pocket i checked and I collected him from my pocket and placed him on the tray as nonchalantly as I possibly could.
I did my utmost to avoid looking at the security personnel.
I approached the scanner and walked through without a beep.
On the other side, I stood waiting for my personal belongings.
Unlike everyone else, my tray was delayed.
"Sir, come here a moment please, can you look at the screen please"
“Certainly”
“This appears to be a prawn”
“Yes, yes it is that’s Prawny, he’s my pet”
“Sir, I’m afraid you can’t carry a prawn into the airport and nor can we allow your Prawny to the other side, you can either wait on the other side of the scanners with Prawny or we find a new home for him”.
I was torn.
I couldn’t choose, but I knew I had to go the gate.
I said good riddance to Prawny and I gathered my belongings and left the security officer there holding a Prawn not quite knowing what alternate reality he just fell in. The look on his face and the surrounding bystanders, it was priceless.
The truth ends here.
If I acted on all the silly ideas I came up with every day, week, month, year then my lifetime would be a total shenanigans. Every once in a while, I have to act on one of these desires, and this desire involved an airport security scanner and a prawn.
One day over a concoction of an undisclosed amount of amphetamines many many beers and a wild tripe talk tangent, the idea of the prawn developed.
It would be most genius to carry a fresh an uncooked prawn into the airport, and and at the security check point where bags are scanned and pockets are emptied and all items are placed in trays on the conveyor belt, prawny as he came to be known, would also be placed for scanning.
Why you may ask, why not I say? For the hilarity, of for the hilarity.
It would be months before the plan would actually fall into place.
A number months back, I had to make a trip the airport to pick up an arriving passenger, of whom I should have been excited to so, but this was not the case. For I had remembered the plan.
PRAWNY
On the way to the airport, I took a detour via the seafood shop and went to the counter and asked for one kingsize prawn please.
I chose the best looking one there, knowing he was about to be on show.
I had brought with me a snap lock bag to keep prawny in safely.
The excitement was building, the plan was in action.
Now I had about a fifteen minute car ride to the airport.
Fifteen minutes of suspense.
I found a carpark as close as I could knowing prawny had little time to stay looking fesh.
I had him in my snap lock bag and kept him there until I made my way to the security check point, where I took him from the snap lock freshness.
Carefully, I placed him in the pocket of my jeans.
I approached the checkpoint and grabbed a tray and was asked to empty my pockets and place all items and metal objects in there.
In order, i took off my belt, grabbed my wallet, mobile phone, car keys and placed them all in the tray.
Prawny was in the last pocket i checked and I collected him from my pocket and placed him on the tray as nonchalantly as I possibly could.
I did my utmost to avoid looking at the security personnel.
I approached the scanner and walked through without a beep.
On the other side, I stood waiting for my personal belongings.
Unlike everyone else, my tray was delayed.
"Sir, come here a moment please, can you look at the screen please"
“Certainly”
“This appears to be a prawn”
“Yes, yes it is that’s Prawny, he’s my pet”
“Sir, I’m afraid you can’t carry a prawn into the airport and nor can we allow your Prawny to the other side, you can either wait on the other side of the scanners with Prawny or we find a new home for him”.
I was torn.
I couldn’t choose, but I knew I had to go the gate.
I said good riddance to Prawny and I gathered my belongings and left the security officer there holding a Prawn not quite knowing what alternate reality he just fell in. The look on his face and the surrounding bystanders, it was priceless.
The truth ends here.
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