Troubles with Salvia

[Nein]

I have lived my entire life in my comfort zone, the best example is probably never flirting or asking a girl out unless she's practically undoing my belt. My experiences with other psychedelics have helped me change this part of my mind, take a couple more chances, become more confident in myself and the universe after the trip, but Salvia just scares me.

I have used the 5X, 10X, and 20X variants, 5X being recreational, 10X being fun in the right mindset, and scary in the wrong once on a large dose, and 20X being flat out terrifying.

When I smoke 20X, I become disassociated from the world, and experience intense fear associated with never coming back to the material world, and see different dimensions. The best example I can give of the hallucinations is that all objects around me that are not being touched by me or have my direct attention dissipate completely, while the objects that are touching me or have my attention take on a new meaning, or become alive and have a will (IE: My television was giving commands to a machine to extract my soul).

My most recent experience, to try to sum it up, consisted of a flashback to an intense trip where I had felt that my soul was being stolen from my body, a machine appearing around me and shoving my soul from my body and replacing it with another (initiating a sort of out of body experience), feeling the sensations and thoughts that my body was experiencing while this new soul was controlling it, a powerful fear that I would be locked out of my body forever unless I returned to it during the trip, and finally a quarrel with the spirit who had taken over, which I won due to my brains familiarity with my own soul and the way that I used it.

The entire time, I was afraid of death. Not physical, but spiritual. I believed that I would be damned to an eternity of confusion and nothingness if I gave up control to Salvia.

I didn't enjoy a second of the Salvia trip, nor have I enjoyed it in the 2 smaller doses of the drug I've taken today, but I'm actually happy about this.

I think that this is the toughest challenge I have come across in my life, and has the potential to totally alter my basic nature and help me become a better person, if I can learn to just give up control for once in my life.

I'm not sure how I should go about letting go of control: I've noticed that when I take my prescribed 20 MG Adderall, I am much less inhibited at school, and generally happier. I recently used Salvia right after using my Adderall, which cause me to stay a bit calm, and I'm also thinking that smoking tobacco with my Salvia could cause euphoria and give me
a sense of well being during the trip.

What do you all think?
I don't want to take a dose that is large enough to force me to accept the trip, but I want to learn to accept it on my own, which is very difficult while under the influence of Salvia.

 

[An Iz]

I think it is a pure decision, your ability to choose, which matters- and faking it by using a drug to change that doesn't totally work. For me, alcohol will let me take salvia twice as far, but it ends up 'meaning' half as much, if you get that.

Also, what do you refer to when you use the word soul?

 

[Nein]

I think it is a pure decision, your ability to choose, which matters- and faking it by using a drug to change that doesn't totally work. For me, alcohol will let me take salvia twice as far, but it ends up 'meaning' half as much, if you get that.

Also, what do you refer to when you use the word soul?

I don't know. When my "soul" was forced from my body, I was both it, and my body at the same time. While it was separate from my mind and brain, I still had emotions, and, and basic thought, yet I could feel the sensations and thoughts that my regular body was experiencing while being controlled by another "soul". It was fully separate from my physical body, yet it seemed like it was the most important part of me, and I feared harm to myself in the "soul" form much more than any harm caused to my physical body.

 

[An Iz]

So your brain or consciousness

 

[SwingBreed]

Salvia is very tricky to work with, and you should know that even seasoned psychonauts who have dedicated incredible efforts to leaving their "comfort zone" again and again still have a lot of trouble with Salvia.

I very much appreciate your mindset of being honored with the challenge. This alone could help you with your further experiences.

Perhaps the most difficult factor of Salvia is that you sort of have to "hit the ground running" with it. It's not something like mushrooms or LSD where you can meditate on its frequency to become harmonized with it -- Salvia is IN MOTION which means you must be prepared to immediately snap into that motion as soon as it grabs you. Sometimes I start speaking in tongues as soon as I exhale the smoke; that's something you could try.

I have had a similar experience to yours maybe six or seven months ago in which I resisted an out-of-body experience, and if its any reassurance, I've tripped Salvia plenty of times since and have had enriching experiences. Salvia doesn't care if you're ready or not, "ready" is all in your head

Adderall and Nicotine to calm the trip? hm.... not for me. have you tried smoking cannabis beforehand? That could help. You mentioned your television -- i couldn't imagine that being a good element. Have you tried smoking it in nature? is there a park near you? That could help open you up. A lot of what "comforts" you could be your enemy in a trip, often its the very alternative to your comfort that gets you through.

Anyway, Salvia is a bizarre, tricky, overwhelmingly awkward plant that I do think has incredible value and much to offer. I love the mystery Salvia presents so much that this is my favorite Bluelight thread ever -- it's basically a collaborative attempt to describe "the machine", as many of us have encountered it.

 

[lysergication]

I recently used Salvia right after using my Adderall, which cause me to stay a bit calm, and I'm also thinking that smoking tobacco with my Salvia could cause euphoria and give me
a sense of well being during the trip.

What do you all think?

I think it's harder to smoke salvia on its own once you've experienced easier and meaningful salvia trip because of a pre-loaded substance..yes you'll get nice salvia experiences but this will not remove your fear about salvia on it's own. You can choose less toxic 'pre-compound' like a psychedelic (2C-B gave nice result for me) instead of an amphetamine. this way, you'll not be tempted to do it too often (like with mephedrone IME).