trinket

[vurtomatic]

she was a sweet young thing
a sexy sweet thing
a young sexy sweet sexy
tasty morsel delectable
venus was a sweet young thing

just of age, already too old
innocent of face, sins of the body

delight delirium desire despair
she was all that in a package

she was a sweet young thing
picked up a heart
bejwelled it was, sparkling it was
blood red rubies sky clear diamonds
venus was my sweet young thing

she laughed she glowed
bejewelled heart asparkle

she bled she cried
blood red rubies sky clear diamonds

she was my sweet young thing
dropped me on the ground
left me in the dust
left me with memories
venus was my sweet young thing

 

[cherub]

this is takes on a very majestic tone, very soothing to read.

good work, always enjoy reading your work

 

[neverwas]

it kinda has a song feel to it very well structured and flows really nice...makes me think of lil girls playing with dolls...kinda a cute feel to it

hugs

 

[vurtomatic]

thank you... this was kinda written like a song lyric, but i wasnt writing it to any piece of music in particular, just... writing it out in a sing-song manner in my mind.