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Neuroscience Trauma Is Neurological

This thread contains discussion about a Neuroscience-related topic
How negative thinking loops get wired in

When you're in this place, low energy high emotion another system in
your brain takes over.

The default mode network.

This network becomes active when you're not focused on something
intentional. Like when you're daydreaming, ruminating or replaying events in your mind. After a setback the default mode
network gets noisy. You start looping on questions like "Why did this happen, What's wrong with me?" And because the
brain likes patterns. It pulls in past experiences to reinforce the current mood. You're not just reacting to what
happened, you're reacting to every similar disappointment your brain can dig up.

It's like an emotional echo chamber and the longer you stay in it, the more real those distorted thoughts feel. This is where a lot of people get
stuck. Not in the event itself but in the narrative that builds around it.
 

3 brain-based strategies to bounce back

So what can you do to get out of the spiral ! How do you reboot your motivation and re-engage your forward momentum.
So there are some and also a few tools that you can use to bounce back. Tools that work with your brain and not against it.

number one
1: Start with action (behavioral activation)

Behavioral activation action first. Motivation second.

When you're stuck the natural instinct is to wait until you feel motivated. But neuroscience tells us that motivation often follows action. Not the other way around.
Behavioral activation is a technique used in cognitive therapy to help people climb out of inertia by doing small structured tasks that give you a sense of accomplishment.
Even tiny wins can nudge your dopamine system back into gear.

For example taking a ten minute walk. Or taking a ten minute walk with your dog or playing catch. Or even organizing you desk.
The action itself is less important than the fact that you're taking initiative. Have you ever gotten stuck with a dead car battery and needed someone to jump start
it. That's how your prefrontal cortex can feel during a setback. Like it's out of juice these small actions are like
jumper cables for your executive function.


a second tool is using micro
2: Use micro-goals to avoid overwhelm.

Goals to avoid threat activation when your brain is in a threat sensitive state big goals can feel overwhelming even paralyzing.
Micro goals are tiny achievable steps that feel doable even when motivation is low. If your goal is to start exercising again your micro
goal may be putting on your workout clothes and that's it. If you do more great but success is measured by starting. Micro goals help you build
trust with yourself again. They say to your brain "See we can still do these things."


The third
3: Reset your dopamine (habits that help)

The third tool is to establish dopamine reset habits after a setback.
It's tempting to reach for quick dopamine hits like SCROLLING, snacking or even zoning out. but those hits are short-lived and they don't restore
long-term motivation.
Instead build in sustainable dopamine. Boosts like novelty. Try something new even if it's something small or movement even 5 minutes of walking or stretching
Connection, call and talk to a friend. And even your Bestie. Social bonding is one of the strongest dopamine boosters that we have.

And then completion. Do something that you can finish in one sitting. Even checking a box releases dopamine. These reset habits don't require a ton of
energy but they gently shift your internal chemistry just enough to help get you moving again once your brain starts to stabilize.
 
Rebuild structure—and don’t weaponize it

The next step is to rebuild structure. And .... for clarity, structure isn't just about productivity it's about giving your brain a rhythm that it can rely on.
When your day has predictable anchors. Like when you wake up eat move or wind down your brain conserves energy you reduce the number
of decisions that you have to make which helps your brain stay calm and focused.

But here's the catch. Don't use structure as a weapon. After a setback you can respond with harsh self talk like I
need to get it together. No more excuses.But your brain doesn't respond well to threats. Especially when it's already down.
What it needs is compassionate accountability. ( it's neurologically necessary for recovery )
 
The science behind self-compassion

So self-compassion isn't just a nice idea. It's neurologically necessary for recovery. Research shows that self-criticism activates the same
threat systems we're already trying to calm down. But compassion activates your brain's care giving system which helps restore emotional balance and re-engage
your prefrontal cortex. So when you notice yourself being impatient or harsh try asking instead "What would support
look like right now?" Sometimes the answer is rest sometimes it's routine often it's both so let's re frame how we think about the setbacks.
 
Final takeaway: Setbacks are signals, not failures

Think about setbacks. They're not signs of weakness or failure. They're signals your brain is asking for re-calibration not punishment. And the good news is your
brain is adaptable with small actions consistent structure and self-compassion. You can bounce back. In fact you can often come back stronger than before from the
fact that your brain can learn from mistakes.
 
How your brain learns from mistakes

Your brain actually learns from mistakes setbacks disrupt but failure refines.

The brain uses prediction error to grow smarter and more adaptable over time.

If this resonates and could help or you know of a way that this has helped please
feel free to share experiences.

And share if you may have an episode in this series for this thread.

Or even a comment if you have one and maybe see what can happen then.
 
What's one practice that helps you feel safe or grounded?

Hmmmmm .....


Mine are .... watching the sunset,
being with my dog .... and music !!!


Remember, healing happens through repetition of safety, not through forced change.
That means creating small, regular inputs that tell your brain I'm okay now.

This could be something as simple like a daily walk. The sunsets.

A ride into the sunset to the store for something, like something fun. Dog food and ice cream or a Cone. Or whatever.

Remember that these healing inputs are like nutrients for your nervous system.
 
It's stimulating and interesting, deep.

Much appreciated thank you for your time and depth into the possibilities ... and passions.

😉😉😎
 
Wow thanks for posting all this … I’ll have to read it in chunks, but gracias for posting it. Kind of perfect timing.

I got this book a while ago called ‘The body keeps the score’ … my old trauma therapist wanted me to get it and read it. I started to months ago but got freaked out and had to stop. But I’m going to start trying to read it again. Anyways, I’m probably rambling … but again gracias @kiely for being here and being you. You’re one of those people that make the world a little better just by being you 🌺💜
 
AngelsandFairiesarereal said:
Wow thanks for posting all this … I’ll have to read it in chunks, but gracias for posting it. Kind of perfect timing.

I got this book a while ago called ‘The body keeps the score’ … my old trauma therapist wanted me to get it and read it. I started to months ago but got freaked out and had to stop. But I’m going to start trying to read it again. Anyways, I’m probably rambling … but again gracias @kiely for being here and being you. You’re one of those people that make the world a little better just by being you 🌺💜
Click to expand...
Omg. I have actually heard of that book somewhere. It must be part of the trauma community.

Yup. And I have to absorb it in chunks too.

Thank you for being part of what it is that you do. Thank you. @AngelsandFairiesarereal

You are refreshing and good feels when we have to soldier through it all.

And thank you for being the glue that helps out in trying to hold it all together always.

Love that. ✨<3 So much !!!!!!!!!!!!
 
It is tough to stay hard wired in reacting to the environment for sure.

As the classic filled glass example. One as half full and one is half empty.

And different perspectives based on our inner experience. Both perspectives are real though.
 
.... Or the self respect, self esteem community. Build muscle !!! 💜👍
 
Habits are stored in the region of the brain called the basal ganglia. This is your brain's auto-pilot system. Once a behavior becomes a habit, the basal ganglia takes over,
allowing you to perform the action with little to no conscious effort.


That means that your brain will actually work harder to maintain the habit, if it believes that that habit reflects who you are. It is from implementing and planning.


Tiny habits, really small ones, can actually rewire your brain to be more resilient. And these aren't just things that you do to check a box off.
There are tools that change how you handle stress, regulate your emotions, and stay grounded when life gets hard.


So if you've ever wondered how small habits can lead to big mental shifts. It actually can happen. Over time, the path becomes so well-worn that the behavior just flows.


And once you're behavior is stored in your basal ganglia, you don't have to spend as much mental energy to keep it going. So if you're struggling to make a habit stick,
ask yourself, "Am I being specific enough? Is my brain getting a clear signal about when and where to act?"


Ingredients are needed to build a habit loop, and over time, those loops become your default. And once you're behavior is stored in your basal ganglia, you don't have to spend as much mental energy to keep it going.


People who build lasting habits don't just change their behavior. They change how they see themselves.


They start telling a new story, one with where the desired habits sits with who they are, not just something that they're trying to force.


We all deserve a chance and can become stronger and build on who we are and how we can, in fact, evolve.
 
I found this to be kind of good and interesting food for thought kind of thing with

.... that thing called brain. I can probably stretch it a little bit more at a later time.

But for right now it's kind of deep enough anyway.

And being that is this:
Confidence is not a behavior.
 
Confidence is not a behavior.

It is a world of view. It has nothing to do with yourself.

It has nothing to do with anything else, say, like your belief in yourself.

No one is ever going to understand you. Not your spouse, not your parents
or your kids or your best friend who totally gets you. And that is the price of being a human being.

And if you're waiting for somebody to finally get you, it will not happen. You're going to die waiting.

This is freedom, but only if you're willing to use it. You're not using a tool.
 
You're not using a tool.

You're using information to shape your own world view. Once you stop chasing, we stop mirroring and needing people to mirror back our

'specialness', then you're free to build something real.

But if you don't do that, you're going to keep chasing validation.

And you're going to build your life inside of a prison. And it's not a prison with a bunch of prison bars. Like metal prison bars.

It's a prison made of mirrors where all you're spending your entire freaking life on is trying to discover yourself in other people.

And not one of those people from birth to death will ever really show you who you are.

They just reflect back what you're supposed to be, what they expect to see, maybe what they need to feel better about themselves.

That's how they see you. They see you in a way to feel better about their own identity.

We kill ourselves making the perfect documentary of our life. And then all they remember is the one time that you fell off the boat or looked stupid.

That's what stands out because that's what helps them feel better.

So, can you show up honestly when it would be so much easier to perform?
 
kiely said:
No one is ever going to understand you. Not your spouse, not your parents
or your kids or your best friend who totally gets you. And that is the price of being a human being.

And if you're waiting for somebody to finally get you, it will not happen. You're going to die waiting.
Click to expand...
Respectfully, I disagree with this so much.
Will they “truly” understand every though?every choice.. my insane behaviours?
No. Never. But they understand my soul.

I removed all my friends from my life because they did not deserve my chaos. And they would’ve died trying. I was saving them the heartache of trying to help me. I was wild and not willing to listen

If you stop trying to put out your own healthy vibes.. you’ll always feel the trapped victim .. and probably with good fucking reason.

Honestly kiely? I feel you have been deeply used and abused - I’m sorry if I’m wrong.

I get why you need to shut down and protect yourself … but don’t stay there. Don’t live in THAT!!

Rise you crazy bird!!! RISE!!!!!

Release yourself from the people that hurt you. Of course you’re fucking disgusted by terrible people. OF COURSE!

But please.. take a journey with me :)
 
But it is the absolute fastest way to become confident and to shift that mindset and that worldview into how unspecial I am.

Figure out the ways that you want to be seen as special. They're going to start popping up and you can start getting more and more aware of all those cuz we tend to like go the the opposite direction.

So the goal is: I'm very very aware of all of those things. I don't need that from other people. But this is that it doesn't matter whether it feels like you or not. You could shave it into a mohawk.

As long as you're not doing it exclusively for other people. Maybe that's the ultimate way to be for enlightenment. Just sh*t your pants and walk around !
 
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