PTSD Trauma causing entitlement and/or selfishness

ChemicallyEnhanced

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 29, 2018
Messages
10,538
Location
UK
Does anyone think this may have happened with them, even if you didn't realize it until you thought about it just now?

I was reading about a link and it DOES kinda make sense.

I have C-PTSD from several years of repeated trauma, including multiple unrelated traumas....and now that that period of my life is over, I think I probably do (subconsciously) kinda have an attitude where if I wanna do something I will, be it overeating, drugs, casual sex, ignoring responsibilities etc. I'm actually working on that, but I think there this connection where, if you've been through a prolonged period of trauma/severe suffering...afterwards it's very easy to excuse things with "I think after going through X for so many years, I'm entitled to a bit of Y".
Maybe like, you feel like the world/life/fate/whatever owes you some joy to balance out the really bad shit?
 
Which is coming first though, the 'thought' or the underlying 'thought process'.

The thought may just be a post-rationalization over the top of a thought process that has already been made prior to the thought appearing in the mind. Some incoming perceptions may activate a pattern (neurological and/or mental) that is rooted around the trauma/s that were experienced, which then trigger a reactive avoidant style pattern seeking to mask the pain with pleasures. There isn't really anything selfish or entitled about that, because it's happening in the back of your mind.

I mean even 'reactive avoidant style pattern' may not be accurate either. Who is to say that the pain one experiences is not fair ground for wanting to feel some pleasure to balance out the deficit you feel in your soul? It might not resolve or solve the underlying issue, but that doesn't mean we have to label it as "selfish" or "entitled".. that's just the utilitarian psychology aspect asserting itself (society wants you to fit the groove and shut up).
 
I totally get this. I think in exactly the same way. I can justify anything after what I've been through in my life so far. I have C-PTSD and I've managed to rationalize my whole addiction issue this way. But it us just a rationalisation? What do I mean when I use the word "rationalisation." You could use the word "excuse" But it's the meaning behind the words isn't it? The word "justify" doesn't make it sound as bad, but it almost means the same.

Babygirl. X
 
You mentioned that everyone seems to be the victims rather than the perps. I think that's society jn general at the moment. No one wants to take any responsibility. I'm estranged from my kids at the moment and have been for do a few years now. But their idea of trauma is their awful bloody childhood. They believe that their problems today are a direct result of me, their mum, and her drug use when they were younger.

Yes I used drugs, and yes I wasn't the perfect mum, but my drug use wasn't openly seen by my kids. I was scripted my meds and didn't get anything on the street from the time I was scripted, when my first child was born, until I split with their dad 13 years later. They stayed with their dad as they were settled in school and I didn't want to disrupt their lives any more than the split from my husband had already had done. So I didn't move them 400 miles away from everything they were familiar with. That was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I saw them every weekend for the whole weekend, Friday night until Sunday night. But now I think I'm accused of deserting them. That's why they have problems.

Sorry for pulling this thread a little off topic. But in the UK everyone seems to be a victim nowadays. But when you mention trauma they look at you like you've gone crazy. I do wonder if it's too easy to allow yourself to be a victim, something I've fought against being for as long as I can remember. I'm a fuckin' survivor, that's what I am. Society has changed so much in the last 20-30 years, people are perhaps more open about talking about their shit nowadays.

But honestly, I know how I react to the Menton of childhood abuse and some of them don't seem to react the way you'd expect,except to blame every other fucka for their own problems today. I suppose that's easier than having to deal with the problem at hand. Admit it's your mistake and deal with it. Life is hard enough so why make it even more difficult for Christ's sale?

Babygirl. X
 
Can you not go on off-topic tirades about immigration and shit like that man @Jnowhere the post has nothing to do with that

And PTSD is a real diagnosis that people get from all sorts of different bad things that happen to them beyond going to war.

Your derogatory comments and fear mongering about immigrants and questioning whether people with trauma have legitimate issues, are inappropriate for a harm reduction and mental health support community
 
You mentioned that everyone seems to be the victims rather than the perps. I think that's society jn general at the moment. No one wants to take any responsibility. I'm estranged from my kids at the moment and have been for do a few years now. But their idea of trauma is their awful bloody childhood. They believe that their problems today are a direct result of me, their mum, and her drug use when they were younger.

Yes I used drugs, and yes I wasn't the perfect mum, but my drug use wasn't openly seen by my kids. I was scripted my meds and didn't get anything on the street from the time I was scripted, when my first child was born, until I split with their dad 13 years later. They stayed with their dad as they were settled in school and I didn't want to disrupt their lives any more than the split from my husband had already had done. So I didn't move them 400 miles away from everything they were familiar with. That was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I saw them every weekend for the whole weekend, Friday night until Sunday night. But now I think I'm accused of deserting them. That's why they have problems.

Sorry for pulling this thread a little off topic. But in the UK everyone seems to be a victim nowadays. But when you mention trauma they look at you like you've gone crazy. I do wonder if it's too easy to allow yourself to be a victim, something I've fought against being for as long as I can remember. I'm a fuckin' survivor, that's what I am. Society has changed so much in the last 20-30 years, people are perhaps more open about talking about their shit nowadays.

But honestly, I know how I react to the menton of childhood abuse and some of them don't seem to react the way you'd expect,except to blame every other fucka for their own problems today. I suppose that's easier than having to deal with the problem at hand. Admit it's your mistake and deal with it. Life is hard enough so why make it even more difficult for Christ's sake?

I know everyone reacts differently to trama from abuse in their early years, I'm just speaking from my own experience when people talk to me about their own past. In rehab I was taught, re educated, to look at body language, facial expressions, what people say and just as importantly, what they don't say that they would usually say. Behaving out of character that's out of place. That's what I meant.

Babygirl. X
 
Last edited:
Can you not go on off-topic tirades about immigration and shit like that man @Jnowhere the post has nothing to do with that

And PTSD is a real diagnosis that people get from all sorts of different bad things that happen to them beyond going to war.

Your derogatory comments and fear mongering about immigrants and questioning whether people with trauma have legitimate issues, are inappropriate for a harm reduction and mental health support community
I have no idea what you are talking about. I must have accidentally doubled up on my meds and I have switched from one benzo to another and probably took both, accidentally, along with extra Oxy and Gabapentin. I have had serious stomach pain and been unable to eat and that combined extra pills and doubling up will definitely cause a me to pass out or in this case I must have blacked out. Sorry. I just want the pain to stop. I had no idea.

Huh, I was bitching about immigration? I would have thought I would have bitched about illegal aleins, who are here illegally and thus are criminals. But you say immigrants, then I assume I said some offensive things about people who went through the proper channels, got visas and are here legally. I am from the bottom of my heart sorry for anything derogatory I said about legal immigrants.

Also I agree PTSD is real and not just something veterans have. I am sorry for whatever I don't remember writing.

I am sorry I was on here. I must have blacked out. I am sorry for going way off topic. Even though I don't remember, what I wrote. Seriously. I am sorry.😞
 
Hey mate, you're cool. It takes a lot to admit you fucked up and apologised. Good to see some people still have some standards. I hope you're feeling better today @knowhere.

Babygirl. X
 
Moved from TL -----> TDS, as the content of this thread seems more serious in nature and deals with mental health issues
 
I have no idea what you are talking about. I must have accidentally doubled up on my meds and I have switched from one benzo to another and probably took both, accidentally, along with extra Oxy and Gabapentin. I have had serious stomach pain and been unable to eat and that combined extra pills and doubling up will definitely cause a me to pass out or in this case I must have blacked out. Sorry. I just want the pain to stop. I had no idea.

Huh, I was bitching about immigration? I would have thought I would have bitched about illegal aleins, who are here illegally and thus are criminals. But you say immigrants, then I assume I said some offensive things about people who went through the proper channels, got visas and are here legally. I am from the bottom of my heart sorry for anything derogatory I said about legal immigrants.

Also I agree PTSD is real and not just something veterans have. I am sorry for whatever I don't remember writing.

I am sorry I was on here. I must have blacked out. I am sorry for going way off topic. Even though I don't remember, what I wrote. Seriously. I am sorry.😞
It's all good. Sorry you're having stomach issues and I hope you feel better
 
Top