took sub this morning, copped H this afternoon . WTF?

i dont see why he should have (or really, even be capable) to do tapering on his own, cant he get some fucking help? from his parents and the myriad of addictions services in this fucking spoiled hemisphere?

drug abuse is partly a psychological and social problem; but the vast riches there for the taking in this continent seem to propel young people into reckless self-indulgence which, being a fundamentally blind-sided philosophy, will result only in great pain. i am now sifting through wreckage i have created. recovery is incredibly painful, because of the damage done while being addicted. the physical part, to me, is a piece of cake. the psychological cravings and such are what throw me for a loop

jake.
you're obviously a somewhat well-mannered young man.
just see yourself as deserving another chance, that you really want and deserve and are capable of eventually producing for yourself if not a perfectly happy, then a relatively toxin-free lifestyle and even have a family of your own eventually. the inability to do so for most addicts is what i think really damages my sanity at least. quit before its too late. if you dont really want to, then you never will. but you have to see it for what it is, without glamour, to really want it.
thats the last i can write here
 
I dont no about you but suboxone just gives me one big head ach.Now if you are sick of being dope sick and suboxone dosnt do it for you then you sound like me I to would do a bunle and still go out looking for more. what it came down to is I had to get on methadon its working great I dont wont H or oxys Im maintaining just fine try it you will like it!!!!!!!
 
Personally I think everybody is being a bit rough to jake. Yeah he isnt staying clean but he is trying, it is definitely not easy. God knows if I posted a thread about trying to get clean shit it would have went on for a decade, besides as sick as it sounds I like reading about stuff like this. I did write alot about it on the old junkylife.com [http://seedlesss.wordpress.com/category/heroin/] but for me even trying to open the door and asking for help never happens. When people take an interest or start to care that is when I get uncomfortable and turn my back. anyways

Whats the plan with the methadone jake. I would definitely stretch 100mgs or was it 120 for 5 days. Around here many places used to offer a 3-5 day detox with methadone and it wasn't painless but sometimes all you need is a tiny bit of opiates in your system to get that thought out of your head concerning using. Have you figured out if there is a time in the future where you will be able to check in somewhere for a detox? I would shoot for that maintain till you have a time opening and check into rehab.

I know that sounds kinda stupid waiting to get clean but I know I used to do that and I suppose I still do in someways. My life was consumed with drugs and just the thought of doing it seemed good at night but than when day broke eh not so good idea. Keep trying. What are you going to do when you run out of pills [have you yet?] it is SOO easy to put of getting clean and these days I often wonder why I took so long but even though I tried to get clean so many times. All you can do is keep trying.

peace.
seedless
 
How did a thread about quitting opiates turn into an argument. An argument has nothing to do with quitting opiates. Jake if you want to quit, just isolate yourself. If you can not isolate yourself right now, don't bother trying to quit. Nobody can quit with a big bag of shit next them.
 
I didn't know this was a thread about quitting opiates lol.

And my arguing (for him to quit) has more to do with actually quitting than telling someone NOT to quit. Think about it.
I still agree however I'm finished telling him to taper/go to detox because he's clearly demonstrated he has more excuses not to quit, than excuses not to use. So my new stance is the same as yours anyway now, he should just keep doing what hes doing... and I KNOW thats advice he can actually take for once.

Good job Jake! (see now I feel useful for once)
 
@jake99
I think most people know in their heart whether they have truly had enough of opiates, even at the beginning of withdrawals. I have never detoxed sucessfully of heroin/meth or subs in my life and i knew after a few days of WD's it was just a matter of when and where , before i used again, so your not alone in finding it difficult, opiates are not called the most addictive substance known to man for nothing. anyway good luck and keep on trying ya have to start somewhere
 
jake you know what i really respect about you is the fact tha you always say the truth. I would feel ashamed if this was my thread to come on and write well i fucked up 2day did a bundle....I would prob just stop posting cuz id feel emberased so that is really mature of u 2 do that. That is my main reson y i believe in u that u really want to quit or else u would just come here n lie that ur clean but u never do that.
 
"I can't measure a liquid" really? Great, if you are gonna play dumb like that with me theres no point.
How about a fucking turkey baster, milimeter eyedropper, teaspoon with ml markings, syringe, baby bottle, there prob 10 different ways to measure a liquid in 2010.

This.

Pharmacies give out baby syringes all the time. For free. You don't even have to buy anything. Just go in and ask for a baby syringe and they will give you one.

lol @ turkey baster :D
 
This.

Pharmacies give out baby syringes all the time. For free. You don't even have to buy anything. Just go in and ask for a baby syringe and they will give you one.

lol @ turkey baster :D

Exactly thank you.
What made me react as angry as I did is the fact that the kids a culinary arts major.
When it comes to measuring liquids thats the #1 major for it lol. So I got the impression he's actually faking a certain level of intelligence at this point just so it looks like he has valid reasons not to taper.

He doesn't wanna measure liquids because he doesn't want to TRY tapering, so he lies that he can't do it.
If totach considers that "trying", I guess its a very relative word.

His mind is always armed to defend his using no matter what the situation. People would say thats the "disease" doing it, I'm sorry, but thats Jake doing it.
The more people blame the disease the less Jake has to blame himself. I know when I use to be in his position and people would tell me "its a disease" I'd smile inside like "cool now I have an excuse to use even more", all a while knowing damn well it was my hands that put those drugs in my mouth.

I could just be an asshole but I think I'm too much a realist to buy into this thread any longer. Sorry Jake.
 
hey u know whats funny guys i really feel like theres some reverse pyhcoligy goin on here n i think its working.This is the most ive ever seen jake wright in a post.Jake mayb if u wrote alittle more then "did subs 2 days bought bundle after" people would understand u better,but you dont really ever giv a reason y u got that bundle.We all get cravings man so u cant just say u wound up doin the dope cuz u had a craving or else u will never be clean.No opiate user would ever be clean if they acted on evrey craving they had.I really feel like boj is getting thru to u by saying mean things cuz this is the most i ever seen u wright like i said b4.You know we r all here for u jake u gotta understand y some people might be getting frustrated alittle but hey just the fact that they r getting frustrated should make u feel good cuz that shows that they actually care about u.I think u should open up alittle more when u respond in ur threads and wright alittle more then "went to school took subs in the morning but got a bundle back to subs tomorow". Anyways dont worry man i think ur headed in the right direction and i think boj speaking his mind is helpful in a way.
 
I feel you man . I guess i am getting a kind of wake up call even though i feel he is being a dick about it ...............So basically i talked with my friend who can help me out and i can work out a plan so that i can stay on a low dose of methadone for a little while...........this will save me a lot of money that would be wasted on dope , i will only have to get methadone once a week and i can take about 20 mg a day and it holds me better than subs.............i dont even really get cravings for dope when i have the meth but on subs i could take a whole one and still mentally be obsessed with dope and wind up getting high even after subs.........so i think for now since i cant get on the clinic that this is my best option . Plus i will be able to finish my degree in school , work , etc without being sick and avoid wasting money and having to risk my freedom coppin H in the hood ..............
 
^ Sounds like a sound plan man ! Stick with it. Just know that methadone is harder to kick than heroin (the sickness isn't as intense, but it last much longer).
 
damn well maybe if i only am taking 20 mg for 2 weeks , it wont be that bad ?

For real man? You've had scores of taper plans set out in front of you and yet it appears that you haven't even given it any thought. I've been following this thread and frankly, its gotten ridiculous. I almost think that you're just saying shit like this to get on peoples' nerves because i really don't believe you are so dumb as to not retain any suggestions or concepts, such as tapering. If you stay on a steady dose of methadone, 20mg, then you will WITHDRAWL from 20mg of methadone. Now im no expert with the done', but from my knowledge that would be quite uncomfortable. Much more uncomfortable than, say, 5 mg or even 10 mg of methadone.

Im sure alot of people that have tried to help would just love to measure out your doses for you, because it seems that for the life of you, you are unable.

With that said, i'll offer you another suggestion.
If 20mg holds you, then start on 20mg. FOR A COUPLE DAYS. The longer you stay at a dose that you are perfectly comfortable at, the worse your withdrawls will be.
So start 20, and as soon as you can, drop it to 15. Once at 15, you might feel some discomfort; who knows. If so, stay at 15 mg till you are able to handle it; a few days, maybe a week. But if you jump to 15mg, and feel FINE, then dont just stop there. The next day, drop to 10. If that makes u feel a little uncomfortable, well good! Its better than full on withdrawl. But tough it out and stay at 10mg for whatever period it takes for you to adjust. If you still feel like shit after a week, then STAY on 10mg. But if after 5 days you feel normal, DROP YOUR DOSE AGAIN.

Does this make sense? Needlessly staying on 20mg is only going to prolong the time until you are clean. You want to be on the verge of discomfort/withdrawl all the time, that is the only way you are going to avoid a really shitty withdrawl, is to take baby steps. Then once your at 5mg, just stop. Or, if you learn how to measure volumes, keep dropping that dose!

it might look like:
20mg x 3 days, 15mg x 4 days, 10 mg x 6 days, 7.5mg x 5 days, 5mg x 10 days,
or maybe:
20mg x 1 day, 15 mg x 3 days, 10 mg x 5 days, 5 mg x 1 week ........

Dont just set some stupid arbitrary schedule where you cut your dose in half leaving you feeling like hell, because its obvious that such a change will induce discomfort that will lead you to relapsing like you have so many times before.
Listen to your body, and what YOU can handle, and adjust the doses accordingly.
If you can't take any discomfort whatsoever, then my advice is that you just give up the fight until you grow a pair, get on MMT, and take on the gorilla once you actually have the will and fortitude to do so.

Good luck! I know im probably wasting my time, but hey, maybe not?
Just attempt what i suggested, you have nothing to lose, so fucking go for it.
 
i wish it was pills so i could break them in half, liquid is tough

Dude tell me how many mg of methadone are in each x amount of liquid. Just fucking measure out the 20mg dose in a measuring ______. DO THAT, and i'll convert it to 15 mg, 10 mg, 7.5 mg, 5 mg, etc etc etc. Holy fuck. It feels like your trolling no joke man, you haven't put ANY effort into making an ATTEMPT at measuring it, stop acting so freaking incompetent and do something useful.
-- Pills would be HARDER to measure out, liquid dosing is MUCH more accurate than taking pill fragments that you eye-ball.
If you utilize that lame ass excuse again, i vote that this thread gets closed because you obviously just wanna piss people off with your lame, half assed joke of an attempt at sobriety. Im starting to think its not even an attempt its just a front so you can get attention because you've already driven away the people in your life with your idiotic routine.
 
i wish it was pills so i could break them in half, liquid is tough

Jake,

I have an extra - wrapped and unused - baby syringe that I was going to use to plug something, but I chickened out. I will be glad to send it to you. It measures in ml and fractions thereof. Guess where I got it for free? WALGREENS.

It is sitting in my medicine cabinet. I am trustworthy and would not give your address to anyone - but you have to promise to use it.

Also, if you're using you can always snap the needle off a clean rig and do it that way.

You are in culinary school? OK, now I really HAVE heard everything. ;)

I continue to wish you luck. I wish you wouldn't throw the help offered you in the faces of your friends and comrades here, especially Bojangles, who has really gone out of his way to help you get clean.
 
This is what happened . It was a 100 mg dose, which was poured into a cough medicine bottle...........when i got home i split it into 6 jars trying to make them about even so theyd each be about 20 mg...........but if i get the baby syringe do i just take drops out at a time and maybe it would be about 5 mg or so since 20 mg is such a small amount ?
 
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