Well, tonight it's 23 December of 2011. This year was a real roller coaster, almost all the economies of the world collapsed, nuclear meltdowns and budget standoffs, crumbling dictators and riot everywhere — not to mention a couple devastating storms and the fall of the foundation of physics. The only thing for certain about 2011 was chaos. And my life was just as worse -- some weeks ago.
In September I lost my six years old job, but a week and half ago I got a new one in a cool enterprise that moves a lot of money... it took me only 7 days of work to show my coworkers and even to my boss what I was able to do, how much I knew, and how strong was my will.
But 2 weeks ago I was nothing, I was contemplating suicide, I had no money, no food, a little of drugs (I am a benzo-opiate addict).
The change of my ego was thanks to several things. I won't go into detail about this, at least now.
That's why tonight I want to celebrate, feel good, and also disassemble and reassemble my perception of things. Deconstruct and reconstruct what we call 'reality'.
8pm - I just came from work. I feel happy and the weather it's chill at last. The set & setting probably couldn't be better. I am prepared to listen to music, play videogames, watch anime and movies.
I did:
9pm- BL just went 'server too busy', everyone must be tripping right now lol.
I feel opiated and a little nauseaus, but everything it's going pretty well. I'm playing Infamous 2 while downloading the Sonic CD demo which I will probably buy through PSN (I'm a Sonic fan lol).
9.50pm- I just finished Infamous 2 on evil. I feel veery euphoric, very opiated, chaotic like, yet still there are few CEVs (but 'that feeling' in my stomach of something very weird coming).... I'm not taking any benzo for now.
10.05pm- I still feel nauseus. It's not bothering me, but it's strange for me to be nausaus for so long. Anyway, I want more OEVs, so doing more DXM (and 1mg Clonazepam just to prevent seizures).
10.20pm- watching anime lying in bed I am hugely smiling and feeling both the opiate pleasure and tension of phenethylamines. Whatever, I'm feeling wonderful.
10.40pm- I can feel the 2-CE inside me. Add the DXM and the Codeine (and whatever the Memantine does), and you get 2 very intense feelings of pleasure, and right now, they feel like totally different, and both can be enjoyed. This is awesome. I don't want this to never end. (literally)
11.10pm- I'm feeling extreeeeeemly happy, it's like I'm having the time of my life in my brain. The OEVs are beginning now, and my body temperature it's hot. I am veeery tempted to do 10mg more 2-CE, but instead of that, I will do more DXM. I think I know why I'm doing it.
Btw, I'm watching anime, Bakemonogatari specifically. Dark in my room, tripping hard, Blueray quality.
Keep it coming please. Doing more DXM (~250mg all included).
11.43pm- Well, I'm taking 10mg 2C-E more. I don't know the next time I'll have an opportunity like this, doing Codeine, DXM, Memantine, and 2-CE, all at once. There. 20mg 2C-E orally gelcaps taken counting the both gelcaps. The first one 4 hours ago, the second one, another hour ago. This will be a long night. Let us enjoy our chaotic reign. (what?)
12-13am- Time dilatation it's strong. I think the DXM it's blocking the 2C-E effects. I just realized that, because I'm not having strong CEVs. But It's very probable time will tell. Still feeling very opiated so I'm gonna... listen to some music.
1am- listened to music. Took a shower. realised a lot of stuff. I realised I'm Chaotic neutral by nature. I must be tripping hard lol. But it's good to realise that stuff. Also taking another 1mg Clonazepam because it won't "STOP" the trip and will probably help out. I know why I'm taking it.
1.20am- Watching The_Girl_Who_Leapt_Through_Time, feeling a loooot more the 2C-E now (maybe it was the bath? the time? the benzo? who will ever know?) I have realized my true nature is Lawful Chaotic, and that, it's not possible, because after all D&D's Alignment... wait... if I'm chaotic lawful... my life can't be measured by some game's alignment. And that makes sense. It just doesn't that I'm realising my life is chaotic lawful. Well, me, brain, people, let's get over it. Let's keep watching the damn movie.
2am- While watching the movie, the 2C-E it's finally showing up OEVs and strong sensation.
2.10am- Time is moving soooooooooooo slowly. I'm feeling wise.
3am- Finished watching The_Girl_Who_Leapt_Through_Time_(2006)_[720p,BluRay,x264]_-_THORA. Not only watching the movie itself was very enjoyable, but also strongly getting the character faces, the emotions, the paints, the sunset, the flow of time, the meaning of reasources.... EVERYTHING. Just lol.
5.35am- Well, I'm still high, but already taking some benzos and Clonidine to come down without hurry and feeling very good opiate like. I spent most of the night watching the best anime of this year (Madoka/Steins;Gate pretty much for me). It was very enjoyful both the art of Madoka and the complexity of the story of Steins;Gate. Also, I have noticed everything I watched tonight it's related to time travel in some form, being magical or scientific. This trip is probably finishing. I loved so much these last hours. I'm happy and proud-- yet, the neutral mental feeling of 2-CE it's present again. And I respect it.
6pm(the next day)- I slept a lot. And I can still see the improved visual and audio detail that left the 2-CE. I also don't feel any pain at all (at all) probably because of the mixture of opiates. Yesterday was a super fun night, and it's exactly what I wanted. The most special feeling about this were the extreme time dilatation. At some point 10 minutes feel like an hours.
I just won't do this combo again because of the slow absorption of the drugs (the DXM in particular, it slows every drug taken orally even more).
Next stop: 2-C-T-7. Merry christmas guys.
In September I lost my six years old job, but a week and half ago I got a new one in a cool enterprise that moves a lot of money... it took me only 7 days of work to show my coworkers and even to my boss what I was able to do, how much I knew, and how strong was my will.
But 2 weeks ago I was nothing, I was contemplating suicide, I had no money, no food, a little of drugs (I am a benzo-opiate addict).
The change of my ego was thanks to several things. I won't go into detail about this, at least now.
That's why tonight I want to celebrate, feel good, and also disassemble and reassemble my perception of things. Deconstruct and reconstruct what we call 'reality'.
8pm - I just came from work. I feel happy and the weather it's chill at last. The set & setting probably couldn't be better. I am prepared to listen to music, play videogames, watch anime and movies.
I did:
- 100mg DXM
- 120mg Codeine
- 10mg Memantine
- 10mg 2-CE
- Everything taken with Gatorade and Pepsi
9pm- BL just went 'server too busy', everyone must be tripping right now lol.
I feel opiated and a little nauseaus, but everything it's going pretty well. I'm playing Infamous 2 while downloading the Sonic CD demo which I will probably buy through PSN (I'm a Sonic fan lol).
9.50pm- I just finished Infamous 2 on evil. I feel veery euphoric, very opiated, chaotic like, yet still there are few CEVs (but 'that feeling' in my stomach of something very weird coming).... I'm not taking any benzo for now.
10.05pm- I still feel nauseus. It's not bothering me, but it's strange for me to be nausaus for so long. Anyway, I want more OEVs, so doing more DXM (and 1mg Clonazepam just to prevent seizures).
10.20pm- watching anime lying in bed I am hugely smiling and feeling both the opiate pleasure and tension of phenethylamines. Whatever, I'm feeling wonderful.
10.40pm- I can feel the 2-CE inside me. Add the DXM and the Codeine (and whatever the Memantine does), and you get 2 very intense feelings of pleasure, and right now, they feel like totally different, and both can be enjoyed. This is awesome. I don't want this to never end. (literally)
11.10pm- I'm feeling extreeeeeemly happy, it's like I'm having the time of my life in my brain. The OEVs are beginning now, and my body temperature it's hot. I am veeery tempted to do 10mg more 2-CE, but instead of that, I will do more DXM. I think I know why I'm doing it.
Btw, I'm watching anime, Bakemonogatari specifically. Dark in my room, tripping hard, Blueray quality.
Keep it coming please. Doing more DXM (~250mg all included).
11.43pm- Well, I'm taking 10mg 2C-E more. I don't know the next time I'll have an opportunity like this, doing Codeine, DXM, Memantine, and 2-CE, all at once. There. 20mg 2C-E orally gelcaps taken counting the both gelcaps. The first one 4 hours ago, the second one, another hour ago. This will be a long night. Let us enjoy our chaotic reign. (what?)
12-13am- Time dilatation it's strong. I think the DXM it's blocking the 2C-E effects. I just realized that, because I'm not having strong CEVs. But It's very probable time will tell. Still feeling very opiated so I'm gonna... listen to some music.
1am- listened to music. Took a shower. realised a lot of stuff. I realised I'm Chaotic neutral by nature. I must be tripping hard lol. But it's good to realise that stuff. Also taking another 1mg Clonazepam because it won't "STOP" the trip and will probably help out. I know why I'm taking it.
1.20am- Watching The_Girl_Who_Leapt_Through_Time, feeling a loooot more the 2C-E now (maybe it was the bath? the time? the benzo? who will ever know?) I have realized my true nature is Lawful Chaotic, and that, it's not possible, because after all D&D's Alignment... wait... if I'm chaotic lawful... my life can't be measured by some game's alignment. And that makes sense. It just doesn't that I'm realising my life is chaotic lawful. Well, me, brain, people, let's get over it. Let's keep watching the damn movie.
2am- While watching the movie, the 2C-E it's finally showing up OEVs and strong sensation.
2.10am- Time is moving soooooooooooo slowly. I'm feeling wise.
3am- Finished watching The_Girl_Who_Leapt_Through_Time_(2006)_[720p,BluRay,x264]_-_THORA. Not only watching the movie itself was very enjoyable, but also strongly getting the character faces, the emotions, the paints, the sunset, the flow of time, the meaning of reasources.... EVERYTHING. Just lol.
5.35am- Well, I'm still high, but already taking some benzos and Clonidine to come down without hurry and feeling very good opiate like. I spent most of the night watching the best anime of this year (Madoka/Steins;Gate pretty much for me). It was very enjoyful both the art of Madoka and the complexity of the story of Steins;Gate. Also, I have noticed everything I watched tonight it's related to time travel in some form, being magical or scientific. This trip is probably finishing. I loved so much these last hours. I'm happy and proud-- yet, the neutral mental feeling of 2-CE it's present again. And I respect it.
6pm(the next day)- I slept a lot. And I can still see the improved visual and audio detail that left the 2-CE. I also don't feel any pain at all (at all) probably because of the mixture of opiates. Yesterday was a super fun night, and it's exactly what I wanted. The most special feeling about this were the extreme time dilatation. At some point 10 minutes feel like an hours.
I just won't do this combo again because of the slow absorption of the drugs (the DXM in particular, it slows every drug taken orally even more).
Next stop: 2-C-T-7. Merry christmas guys.