thoughts on liquid handcuffs?

[jammedclam]

So I'm making my best attempt at sobriety. After 10yrs of pills and dope shit just started becoming unmanageable for me plus my friends have been dropping left and right this year from the fentynal flood which played a big role.

after never going more than a day with out I checked myself into detox, after a 20g in a week bender of course. I had the option not to let my dr know but who can stay sober when u get 5k worth of percs every month.. Which for the past 2yrs now I had stopped even bothering doing them favoring instead to sell them and.. buy dope duh.

I've been home for a week now and I'll admit I did a line and a few pills but no needles and only cause I was hurting bad on both days (not in a row). The cravings to get high I know I can beat it's the pain that makes me doubt myself.

So I saw my dr Friday and had a good talk. She brought up subs saying they help with pain and I told her I've tried them but found them to be as useful as tylenol. I mentioned I was thinking about doing the methadone clinic to help with the pain but the having to go everyday part didn't sound appealing. Now even tho I fucked up on my narcotic contact she said she could still prescribe me the methadone for pain but wanted a urine and she'd discuss it next visit. Since I had shit in my system tho I conveniently forgot on my way out.

Owell lol I can pull an excuse out of my ass about that. Only thing I'm worried about is my next appt ain't till the 20th and idk if I'll be clean then either since you never know what's gonna be a "good" day or bad day. Now my "good" days I can deal with but on a bad day I just want to die if I can't get any relief and if not I'm stuck in bed pretty much which just makes the pain worse. So not sure what to do. I want to hold out till the 20th but I'm thinking why put myself thru all those painful sober days if chances are I'm gonna have something in my system? I mean are liquid handcuffs really that bad? The clinic is 25mins from me in the spring/fall/winter but up to 90mins away in the summer:/

 

[BlueSaffron]

Its good for pain.. it can be very stabilizing. On a blocking dose I stopped using.

It's just really, really hard to get off for a lot of people. I guess you just need to weigh the pros and cons. I've tried numerous times to detox via methadone. Maybe I just wasn't ready, but I couldn't handle the prolonged feeling shitty.

Since you're in legit pain though it's a harder decision. Hopefully someone else with pain issues will have some advice. All I can give is my two cents which is that methadone can be helpful, but is very hard to quit.

Also, 90 mins is a long drive everyday. Personally I can see myself saying "god I can't make this drive again today.. .ill just pick up and go to the clinic tomorrow".

 

[Smoky]

Hey, congrats on going into detox. I was on the pills for a long time then switched over myself to dope then intermittently subs for a while, then a rapid methadone detox.

I understand the not knowing, especially when hooked and having opiates rule one's life. You're in a tough spot. BlueSaffron has such a valid point. I have pain issues too, seeing a surgeon soon.
Here is the The Pain Management Megathread (Chronic and Acute Pain Discussion) Version 5.0 ~ V.

Also, might receive some help here --- > Suboxone/Buprenorphine Mega Thread v. 19, and the methadone --- > Methadone Mega Thread and FAQ v 2.0.

If you continue detoxing there are remedies. Which you may know, but ... I can provide a list. Clonidine is very helpful for one. The Opioid Withdrawal Megathread and FAQ

 

[Runtoparadise]

Just a quick question OP, are you sure your dr meant methadone maintenance for pain?

Usually if methadone is prescribed for pain it'd be dispensed In tablet form. And you'd take the pack home, not have to show up every day.

Rtp

 

[dopemaster]

OP if you can get methadone tablets for pain, well I would take that.

I fucking hate chronic pain management sometimes and I would literally kill a kitten each visit if I had to in order to get an rx for methadone tablets.

It does have a long half life so you won't get sick.

I really hate the way methadone clinics are run and there are some real downsides to them but it would provide you with stability if you don't mind paying 14 bucks a day to wait in line for juice, get group counseling, pee in a cup all the time, never be able to get a benzo rx, and get a punishment dose for taking anything illicit.

I personally think methadone is a great drug and I think that the private clinics are corrupt evil places and in my area all the methadone clinics are private.

 

[jammedclam]

Not looking to be on benzos, used to do them allot in my younger days but ever since my injury my anger comes out and I'm an sob.

Yes my dr was talking about the Tabs from the pharmacy but having another bad day stuck in bed on ice. Been busted up for 6yrs now and only turning 30 in July. It gets old, I'm getting tired of it hence me being in a psyc ward for being suicidal 3x now. Keep just trying to tell myself I'd rather be alive and in pain then dead and numb.

My dr told me to call her if I was thinking about getting high due to the pain but I know my system ain't clean yet.. Really need to get back to work but I don't see how with out some pain meds. Can't take nsaids cause of ulcers so been chugging Tylenol and can feel the toll it's taking on my organs already.

So tempted to just say f it and go to the clinic but idk

 

[jammedclam]

Just an update I'm hanging in there waiting to see my doc. I got some percs, not enough to last to my appt but they'll be in my system and I can just tell my doc I had some left over. Gotta sub too which I think I'll give away so I'm not tempted once I run out and fuck up my screen.

 

[Smoky]

Hang in there. I remember the wait… first time I got clean.
It seemed like forever but they were so very helpful and I had an advisor nurse to speak with until meeting with my doctor when I was contemplating various ways to end my life on this planet. The phone calls with the nurse were really helpful and once I got to see the emergency addiction psych and got my 3 bottles of withdrawal pills I felt like I just might be okay. It was a huge relief after that just to know I had what I needed to move forward.

 

[szuko000]

My clinic is not an abstinence clinic so the rules are way more lax. You only get drug tested once a month they dont watch and the only thing passing the drug tests does it allow you to get take homes. If you have insurance its free if not they work with you and the only time they punish you is missing 2+ days one day is not even a problem.

Personally my girlfriend and I both love it. I did subs once worked great tried them the second time around and they gave me headaches and shit that never happened the first time so I got on methadone. I think its great. Both my g/f and I were on 90mg, a blocking dose, she went down to 60mg in 2 months because she didnt see the need to stay that high and being on less makes her feel more in control.

I am considering coming down event though I have only been on for about 6 months now I feel like I am ready to taper in a sense. When I was on subs after 6 months I got tired of them quit the clinic got myself down to 0.5mg a day and detoxed myself it was easy. Methadone is harder because stock piling takes forever (no take homes) and I need to make sure I am at like 10-20mg before I leave the clinic. Depending on their mission statement they may not want you to get clean so that is something you need to be prepared for. I promise you if my g/f told them she wanted to get off they would fight her because according to them shes failing her drugs tests for her prescribed benzosn where as I only fail for weed. When I was on subs they tried to tell me no which is why i stock piled and left, its the same clinic and their mission statement is not abstinence i am pretty sure they want almost everyone on it forever.

Personally I love it but you need to be prepared for clinic BS, it is never easy.

 

[cj]

If you can get a doctor to wrote the methadone I would jump all over that. The biggest downside to done is the clinic if you can avoid that then I don't see an issue.

 

[dopemaster]

If you can get a doctor to wrote the methadone I would jump all over that. The biggest downside to done is the clinic if you can avoid that then I don't see an issue.

Yeah a doctor that rx's done is rare and I personally would be all over that. Hell if someone local had that, I would beg for their doctors name if they were taking patients.