I've been separated since early October and for the most part, it was a very happy and liberating choice for me. Back in January, the ex and I decided to give it another try. It lasted all of a week and instead of feeling happy, I fell right back in love with the asshat and it really screwed me up. He filed for divorce and it's been an ugly battle ever since.
BUT! I find out that he is engaged. He met the woman back in 2003 when we were in the swinger lifestyle. To say he was obsessed with her is an understatement. We had a party at our house and he took over 30 photos of her. It hurt me deeply, because in those days, she was thin and I was really overweight. He found her again shortly after I moved out.
I feel so betrayed and angry. He said he loved me, yet was obviously enamored with this woman for years. He didn't have the balls to tell me this and string me along for 7 years. I can't help but feel like a piece of trash. My kids love her and when they are with me, all I ever hear is, "I miss J!" Rips me to shreds even further.
I'm trying so hard to overcome things, rebuild my life and self worth, but dammit! I can't understand why the hell it was so easy for him to jump from 10 years of marriage to yet another one. No break in between. Yeah, he was an abusive dick and made me feel pretty shitty about myself... Still does. But how in the hell can someone jump from one woman to the other like that?
Guys, if you have done this or even have some sort of insight, I'd greatly appreciate it!
BUT! I find out that he is engaged. He met the woman back in 2003 when we were in the swinger lifestyle. To say he was obsessed with her is an understatement. We had a party at our house and he took over 30 photos of her. It hurt me deeply, because in those days, she was thin and I was really overweight. He found her again shortly after I moved out.
I feel so betrayed and angry. He said he loved me, yet was obviously enamored with this woman for years. He didn't have the balls to tell me this and string me along for 7 years. I can't help but feel like a piece of trash. My kids love her and when they are with me, all I ever hear is, "I miss J!" Rips me to shreds even further.
I'm trying so hard to overcome things, rebuild my life and self worth, but dammit! I can't understand why the hell it was so easy for him to jump from 10 years of marriage to yet another one. No break in between. Yeah, he was an abusive dick and made me feel pretty shitty about myself... Still does. But how in the hell can someone jump from one woman to the other like that?
Guys, if you have done this or even have some sort of insight, I'd greatly appreciate it!