Thinking?

[rewiiired]

Thinking.
by rewired,
08/22/03,
3:09 AM.

Seeing is believing...

I lean back, fall deeper into the couch
ash my cigarette, look at you,
and I wonder: do you care,
do I really, should you care,
does it make a difference?

You talk like it's so easy,
yet you want to change, too,
and can't seem to.

Underestimation of the power of internal limitations.
Overestimation of the free will I express.

You lean forward, light your cigarette.
Just look at me: will I melt or burn?
What melts me is your beauty
what burns me is your changelessness;
the same thing that burns
me about me.

I talk like it's impossible,
yet it's easier than I imagine it,
and I think but never do.

Underestimation of the power of internal limitations.
Overestimation of the free will I express.
Misinterpretation of the world that surrounds me.
Forgetting that me and the world that surrounds me
is in my head.

I catch a smile, what are you thinking?
Has your irritation with me given way to apathy?
If I were to change, would you take my hand?
Would you be by my side, adapt
to my insanity?

...but believing is seeing.

Do you care for me, hate me, fear me,
or just the shadows of your denial?
Do I see in you what I could never be,
or could you complete me?

Underestimation of the power of internal limitations.
Overestimation of the free will I express.
Misinterpretation of the world that surrounds me.
Forgetting that me and the world that surrounds me
is in my head.

But seeing is believing is seeing is believing...

I catch a smile:
what am I thinking?