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Thinking of the S at the moment!

A

andyn6990

Greenlighter
Joined
Nov 18, 2010
Messages
37
Location
Cornwall, UK
Heya, my names Andy i love it here at blulight the people are brill i dont post here much i usually just hang around and read posts :-), basically im thinking of k*****g myself , i just dont see anyway out anymore, its so confusing its like the old me is there inside me but i cant get bk to the old me , ive been clean for 42 days but my brain feels like its gonna explode plus ive gone emotionally numb i can hardly feel any feelings or emotions anymore at all all my body and mind feels numb all over , i mean no 1 deserves this shit seriousley , sorry i just get annoyed i just dont know wot to do im on ssris but i dunno weather there helping or not! , does anyone know wot is wrong? Andy!
 
Hi Andy, firstly, massive congrats on being sober for 42 days! That is really something to be very proud of <3

42 days is a good amount of time but sometimes it takes longer than that for our brains to restabilise after long periods of drug abuse. The other factor is that SSRIs (and other anti-depressant medications) can sometimes take as long as 6-8 weeks before they have their full effect. I know the way you're feeling right now is really horrible and it makes each day difficult to get through, but you owe it to yourself to ride this out and wait for the good feelings to come. Which they WILL!

Do you regularly see a drug counsellor or anything? Do you have any close friends or relatives which you can talk to about how you're feeling?? You really need support during this time man. Reach out for help.

Take care okay? And let us know how you're doing <3
 
Yo andy! I was feeling the same way yesterday give yourself sometime and avoid stressful situations. Then tranquility falls into place. Was dealing with drug use and unemployment issues but after some composure, i went out and got a few interviews not much but much better than before. Hold on coz i think its the PAWS getting to you but they dissipate with time. Positive vibes mang.
 
Hi n3ophy7e ,Thanks so much for the reply ,Im currently waiting on some cbt counselling, im trying to think positive and stuff i used to work in the neurology department but even all the informationj i know i feel like a failure coz the negatives thoughts and impulses seem to have taken over and i feel powerless to stop it :-(, istill drink alcohol now and again but not too much , it helps numb the negativity!
 
Thanks overdone and churchu for replies also , im gonna hang on although i feel like shit it feels good talking to someone bout it , the only other person that i talk to that understands is my sister but it sometimes makes her get upset so i tend to not speak to her much!
 
Yeah thats spot on i dont want to die really i just want my old self back and feel good again, Im on zoloft (sertraline) m8 , im quite familiar with the ssris i was on citalopram for a few years that was good for my anxiety!
 
Im 1 of those people that have always loved the party life on the side , but have always had great parents which im so greatfull for as i know a lot of people dont have good familys which i hate ,i believe everyone deserves a great family and upbringing,
 
ok m8, thanks so much for taking the time to talk to me im gonna try and slugg on im having a few beers now but will get a good night sleep and but will be on tommorrow
 
heya , I had a bad day today but in other ways im starting to feel better if that makes sense, i think my anxiety i used to have badly has started to hit me hard but i still feel so disconnected from life , im gonna f****n get through this shit , I feel so sad to myself coz ive moved b in with my parents but i might aswell be living on the streets i dont care bout my health o anything at moment i feel so disconnected from life, makes me feel like a fuckin loser i just want the old me back the person that used to care bout how i looked, i am trying oh my god it shows my emotions are there , there actually tears coming from my eyes thats not a stupid cheesy comment by the way i always say wots really goin on im english so i think im just stubborn like that i dunno
 
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