I feel so confused.
The first odd memory I have is me "hooking up" with some girl on tinder which I really ended up regretting the next day because my dick hurt and she was kind of meh on the look department. Thought I had an STD or something (I don't, thankfully) I wasn't that fucked up for that one though. If interested, I posted about that a couple days ago on my 2nd account:
https://www.reddit.com/r/Drugs/comments/3lxty6/i_started_self_prescribing_etizolam_but_i_fucked/
Then the next one is a a bit more odd. I cant exactly remember when this happened but I was walking through town looking for my car all fucked up and I'm guessing it was around 12am or later. As I was walking a girl sitting on a bench called me over. I happily walked over because I felt like talking to someone since I was feeling lonely. And from what I remember she basically told me I looked fucked up. She then asked if I wanted to take an uber with her and her friend. I agreed to go with them.
From there I remember getting in a nice car. I remember the black uber driver saying something, I think he was talking to me, not sure though. Then they all laughed. After that it's all a blur again. Now all I remember is being in their apartment/dorm/house/whatever it was and then the one girl (lets call her Sammy) kept talking about snapchat. Pretty sure she was snapchatting me or something. She told me to say something to the phone and I said something along the lines of "Hi, I'm fucked up". She was the one that I remember thinking was pretty. The other one I don't really remember what her face looked like. Lets call her Betty.
Anyway, Betty told me I could sleep on the futon or I could sleep in the bed and *cuddle*. After hearing that I said something like "I'll take the bed. It looks more comfortable". But in my head I'm thinking that I'm about to get in bed with two women, but it turned out only being Betty, because Mary walked into another bedroom. And as I think back, I think Betty may have been slightly overweight. Just a random observation.
She then went into the bathroom to shower then walked out with a towel around her. I turned around and covered my eyes and she said it was ok. She changes, my eyes still completely covered, and from there all I remember is that I got into her bed, still fully clothed and just passed out. I kept fading in and fading out though. I think she wanted to have sex or someting, because I swear to god I remember feeling her hand rubbing against my thigh and my penis. Pretty sure it was staying flaccid though. I read etizolam reduces the sex drive.
I also remember her asking me what I was on. IDK what I said, I probably just said Xanax, then that turned into her telling me she only did molly and something else. I must have kept going on about drugs because I remember her saying "Is drugs all you want to talk about?"
So I wake up, although I don't remember waking up. I remember being in a car and then one of the girls said "You said that you parked at yadayada, right?" I said yeah then I was dropped off. I don't remember saying bye or nothing. Never got their names or numbers either.
As I'm looking for my car (I believe it's like 6am now) I realized my pants were kind of damp. I smelled them and I'm 99.9% sure I pissed my pants in this girls bed.
I then get home and I know it's before 8am because my dad goes to work at 8am, and I saw his car in the driveway still. I walk in, parents asked where I was and I don't even know what I said to them.
All I can say is what the fuck. Benzos help with anxiety which is great. It also gives a slight confidence boost and also makes me do things I normally wouldn't do which can be a good thing and a bad thing, but it sucks because I can't remember everything. Maybe that's for the best though.
