i would say for along time i had problems with controlling my use
i continually wanted to be returned to that high i got the first times i rolled, when i could just pop 1 pill and have an amazing night
sooner or later, every few months turned into every month, then to once a week on saturday, then to friday and saturday, then started continuing onto sunday, often hitting days during the week as well
i was hooked, not on the high i was getting but from the search to return to the high i once had
it never returned, rolls turned into multiple, multiple doses which lead to mashey, sketchy, speedy highs, often i would not even feel the effects of later pills but i just continued to consume them hoping to get the impossible high
the more pills i ate, the worse the highs got and the more the negative effects came out
it wasn't even pleasurable anymore, and thats when i just stopped, the thought of even swallowing a pill, just the taste, the feeling of it kicking in, the horrible after effects which seemed to be threw out the whole roll and days after, just thinking about any of it made me feel sick to my stomach
i have now begun to roll again, around once every 1-2 months, i still consume many pills when i do roll tho, once i take my first, i can't stop, but i never continue for days, and can now go easily months in between without any thoughts about it at all
the high i seeked to remember still has never come back, i get happy on pills, but nothing like it was
i come to realize my addiction to re-live the magic has destroyed any chances of me every feeling it again
now i have to settle for only ok rolls, the after effects are always bad, and the magic is diffenitly gone