ShroomySatori
Bluelighter
I was doing great yesterday. I even read a chapter on really interesting physics and reflected on it with my educational background.
However, today I have been in a constant state of extreme panic. Normally I take some milligrams of klonopin a day. On days like this, I took 5mg lorazepam, 15mg etizolam, and 10mg clonazepam. I feel like I am destroying my life with benzos for the sake of getting off an insufflated heroin habit.
Benzos work just fine at much lower doses when I'm using. This is extremely dangerous and I'm worried about seizing or dying. For the record I am diagnosed with a panic disorder that honestly could not be any worse. It is like generalized anxiety, but I am having a panic attack the entire time. I was like that for a year before I got a benzo script in the ER. I can handle any opiate withdrawal, until that fucking anxiety returns.
I personally think that it is not PAWS. I think that it is my panic disorder that was being treated by the heroin. They have a supervised IV site in my city now and I am very tempted to relapse for the sake of my health. And I am combining these benzos with alcohol now because they don't even work anymore so I am chugging 6 beers a day now on top of all that. If anyone has any insights please feel free to PM me because this is the absolute worst time of my life and I can't take it anymore. I personally feel that I should get back on heroin since it cures everything wrong with me while I'm using it, and I end up using a quarter to half the benzos than these horrific doses. I just need some advice because the anxiety is permanent and it's so bad that without opiates I abuse the fuck out of gaba drugs. I'm trying to get ahold of a baclofen script since I feel like I need a gaba B to take with the regular benzo dose but what I'd like the most is ghb. So I am considering those options as it would result in reduced benzo abuse. I wouldn't ask for advice if I didn't think I was going to drop dead by the end of the year.
However, today I have been in a constant state of extreme panic. Normally I take some milligrams of klonopin a day. On days like this, I took 5mg lorazepam, 15mg etizolam, and 10mg clonazepam. I feel like I am destroying my life with benzos for the sake of getting off an insufflated heroin habit.
Benzos work just fine at much lower doses when I'm using. This is extremely dangerous and I'm worried about seizing or dying. For the record I am diagnosed with a panic disorder that honestly could not be any worse. It is like generalized anxiety, but I am having a panic attack the entire time. I was like that for a year before I got a benzo script in the ER. I can handle any opiate withdrawal, until that fucking anxiety returns.
I personally think that it is not PAWS. I think that it is my panic disorder that was being treated by the heroin. They have a supervised IV site in my city now and I am very tempted to relapse for the sake of my health. And I am combining these benzos with alcohol now because they don't even work anymore so I am chugging 6 beers a day now on top of all that. If anyone has any insights please feel free to PM me because this is the absolute worst time of my life and I can't take it anymore. I personally feel that I should get back on heroin since it cures everything wrong with me while I'm using it, and I end up using a quarter to half the benzos than these horrific doses. I just need some advice because the anxiety is permanent and it's so bad that without opiates I abuse the fuck out of gaba drugs. I'm trying to get ahold of a baclofen script since I feel like I need a gaba B to take with the regular benzo dose but what I'd like the most is ghb. So I am considering those options as it would result in reduced benzo abuse. I wouldn't ask for advice if I didn't think I was going to drop dead by the end of the year.