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tacodude said:
It's not me who has to make amends.... They are the ones who lied and hurt me literally hurt me. I do what I need to get through the day, but it's hard and to say the least. It's scary the lengths that have to be gone these days for those growing up especially those trapped in what's supposed to be a beautiful place who has been mislabeled as delinquent into adulthood for struggling to just keep up with the extremely fast pace and overpriced environment and with developmental issues all through growing up in the 90s as I was kept sheltered because my parents thought they achieved the American dream from the baby boomers Era then being abandoned after shit seemed to hit the fan or in other words because I started smoking cannabis and a little later psychedelic use.

It only processed to the opiates when I realized they helped with pain that aloud me not to smoke every 4-6 hours and due to being attacked for cannabis because it was illegal I thought why shouldn't I be able to have a prescription opiate then if my pains do bad I become relent on what my parents considered a illegal unacceptable drug. Of course it was instead taken as I want you to buy me my drugs so I have more money to get high when I wanted to stop buying weed and use my income to take the burden of myself off my parents, which I wanted to ever since they threatened to kick me out of the house for catching me smoke cannabis on my third time when before that I was there cute little funny baby. After that I wasn't their child.....

Actuality apperently I was more so during the time I was using mdma, mushrooms, and mostly Lsd very heavily possibly after I took dmt my first time although not the point I was extracting beautiful crystals to share because I wanted to learn about them. I've always been a helpful person and I've definitely not been the best person to people who have tried to be good to me.. Do to it being so rare and my trust being shattered it's been very hard. I'm literally at my witts end were if something doesn't change that is it of control soon ill probably die whether or not I even intend or hope to.....
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There's still no point on holding onto the grudge man. Hope you are feeling better soon.
 
Yea once my seeds arrive tomorrow as well as my maf soon... Hopefully with something that wears off fast with a dose I can control by the ug I can ween myself of 1 ug a dose using no more than 100 ug at most.... Plus if I get a nasal spray diffuser attachment for a leur lock rig I'll have a nasal spray tool I can completely control the dose with. No more iv yet I still get the quick onset of relief. Just need to clear customs and actuality be what it is... New vendor with little reviews and all. Hopefully I can get some ald-52 and take some time to reflect. I definitely need too... It just sucks there is a huge crackdown now.
 
I took 40mg of 4-ho-met since the subs have worn off, which I took late in the game anyway and now I am still a little sick. I think I will make it. I don't want to go back to heroin ever again although I recognize that is easy to say and really extremely challenging to do. The trip has been great it totally vibed with me in dark times. Wasn't anything holy like dmt though but really good stuff.
 
ShroomySatori said:
I took 40mg of 4-ho-met since the subs have worn off, which I took late in the game anyway and now I am still a little sick. I think I will make it. I don't want to go back to heroin ever again although I recognize that is easy to say and really extremely challenging to do. The trip has been great it totally vibed with me in dark times. Wasn't anything holy like dmt though but really good stuff.
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I hope your cravings are manageable today.
 
Thanks for that. I think reading will help a lot. I'm going to pick up slaughterhouse five where I left off now that I'm tired of waking up to this messed up place. I think reading will help recovery a lot.
 
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ShroomySatori said:
I took 40mg of 4-ho-met since the subs have worn off, which I took late in the game anyway and now I am still a little sick. I think I will make it. I don't want to go back to heroin ever again although I recognize that is easy to say and really extremely challenging to do. The trip has been great it totally vibed with me in dark times. Wasn't anything holy like dmt though but really good stuff.
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ShroomySatori said:
Thanks for that. I think reading will help a lot. I'm going to pick up slaughterhouse five where I left off now that I'm tired of waking up to this messed up place. I think reading will help recovery a lot.
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I love Vonnegut. Say hi to the tralfamadorians for me
 
Hey taco dude! Thanks for your help with some of the silly shit spammers, solicitors and some "new" users be posting in OD recently :)

Know you are appreciated <3
 
Ty definitely know that.... Feeling better today too thanks to pst although I ended up staying up most the night. I'm getting an Xbox in a week along sub the maf so I'm looking forward to trying to ween off....

I'm also going to go meet this south Korean dog farm dog and see if I can do the work to take her home to become my current girls Lil step sister. It's labeled a shiba in, but looks closer to a jindo. I want that dog so badly especially now that I have the time to make sure they can adjust living together. The dog needs a place to just relax and my room even though it's small will be a wonderful place for her.

Also seeing the new apes movie and getting an ice cream cake. Plus no need to take the fucking methadone. I just wish the maf would be here sooner. I honestly wish I could just get a shot today as it's my birthday, but at least I have the seeds.
 
happy birthday taco dude!

is it rude to ask how many rotations of the sun this marks? (or just a general ball park figure? no pressure ;))

ShroomySatori said:
Thanks for that. I think reading will help a lot. I'm going to pick up slaughterhouse five where I left off now that I'm tired of waking up to this messed up place. I think reading will help recovery a lot.
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ah, i love that book.
kurt vonnegut is such a great writer.
 
I'd rather not share my age, but 20-30. I am seeing war of planet of the apes in 3d, meeting a shelter dog, and then relaxing with pst and some weed I'm lucky to have while enjoying a Baskin Robin's ice cream cake
 
Lately, weed has just been making me paranoid. It's really disappointing because it used to be my favorite drug. Anyone else have that happen?
 
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