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  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

The Sad Thread (Anti-Snoo)

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I'm so sorry Sham, Mrs As mother had a 7 year battle with cancer and the end was very messy.

You have been lucky to have each other, she must be a very special lady, I would be nothing without Mrs A I owe her more than I could ever pay back, be strong and that<3

In more sad news I have finally managed to get my father to see a doctor, he's had some test an as I have long suspected he has Alzheimer's, I've been talking to my mum and brother about my concerns for at least 4 years but they didn't want to face it. I've never managed to get close to him and have always wanted to and now it's too late .
 
Shit, so sorry to hear that Shambles :( Really hope you manage to get on as well as possible. Love to you, really <3

edit: rest of it gone, just needed the catharsis. still sad, but the best thing i can do about it is fucking take my life and turn it around and fucking show people i'm not useless, and i do have people who want me, even if it's not who it should be
 
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Fuck Shambles, really sorry to hear about this. <3 As you know everyone is just a PM or post away to chat to.
 
Sorry to hear that Shambles. Sincerely hope she pulls through. <3
My son died from septicemia when the H1N1 virus got into his bloodstream. Horrible to watch happening. :(
 
Thanks, folks <3

Was especially bleurgh t'other night. Booze clearly not the best idea :|

Still no news, that's still not good news. In all honesty, in a funny kinda way it almost doesn't matter if I'm being unnecessarily gloomy. Would obviously be great if she gets through it - and given how well she's been doing with the various cancers it actually wouldn't surprise me if she did - but think it is mostly just that it made the whole "going to be dead soon" thing hit home cos it really hadn't done before. Is not something I tend to think about much so having it brought so sharply into focus was a bit of a kick in the balls. Had to be made real sooner or later and really would be great if she could fight it off cos have hardly been able to see or speak to her recently and she's literally this week got phone/internet (at last) so is finally contactable. Bugger. But nothing to do but wait and see. Thanks for well-wishes <3
 
An update cos just got updated. Mixed news but definitely not the worst. Looks like she's gonna get through the septicaemia after all although is still in hospital and very poorly indeed. They think she's over the worst of it now though. Blimey that gal is a fighter 8o

In somewhat less pleasing news, docs have just updated her life expectancy to 1-3 months. They said three months initially due to severity of diagnosis (three forms of cancer all advanced enough to be past the point of being even remotely curable) but she got some lucky breaks in terms of slow growth. Luck seems to have run out now though cos one of 'em (the liver cancer) has gone into overdrive and she is not a well woman at all :(

But this was always the case really. We knew it was on the way cos there's only so long anyone's luck can last and she had been getting a lot worse this last month or so. Just hope she's reasonably comfortable these last few weeks cos she fukkin loathes opiates but the kinda pain involved really does require them. Is a truly shitty situation but at least she knows exactly where she stands now and family and friends can hopefully really focus on helping her to enjoy the time she has left as much as possible.
 
Is pretty shit, innit :\

I actually don't know how she's doing at the moment cos is hard to get any info. I can't contact her cos she's in hospital still (hospital being quite a ways off in another town) and I ain't family. All I can do is wait to hear from one or another of her kids who I see fairly regularly but have been staying in the town with hospital in it and got no phone so is all a bit patchy. Was supposed to get an update today but not heard anything yet. As ever, it's the waiting that gets to you :\

Last I heard was the above - that a couple days back the docs were saying they thought she was gonna pull through the septicaemia. No idea when she'll be well enough to leave hospital though. The cancer side is what's not looking good now (not that it ever would, of course) cos from what the docs told her it really is endgame now. Could be as little as a few weeks, not gonna be longer than a couple months :(

On the more positive side, the stay in hospital should hopefully build her strength up a bit cos she doesn't eat properly most of the time and has no water at her place at the moment (she's not on mains water and well dries up when it's hot for any length of time) so is hard for her to look after basic needs - like being able to drink water :\

Also on the positive side this last week or two has really brought the situation very sharply into focus cos before I'd been in some kinda denial, I think. It's really not easy to see somebody who means the world to you being eaten alive from the inside and gradually fading away. Especially knowing how much pain she is in, all the shit she has to deal with trying to get phone/internet connected so she can have some contact with the outside world (is very isolated where she lives,) her being alone so often (is impossible for me to visit most of the time cos simply cannot get there without transport and I ain't got transport) and the fact she doesn't even want me to visit much of the time cos she doesn't like me to see her when she's having a bad day... and she's having a lot of bad days of late :(

The positive bit of the above, before I got waylaid by woes, being that I'm not gonna let myself be persuaded to stay away when she gets back. Well, within reason. Obviously I don't want to make her feel even worse if she really doesn't want me to see her when she's really bad, but she still has relatively good days (or did before this last thing anyway) so think I'm gonna kinda force myself on her a bit. In a far nicer way than that sounds. She has nobody to talk to other than her children (and obviously she needs to spend as much time with them as possible) and she really does need somebody to talk to who is not family.

As with anybody with children, she is a mother first and foremost... but she is also a woman. A woman I've been very close to for a very long time. A woman who has shared so many great times with me. A woman who recently told her son (when he asked why she spent so long with me despite it all seeming a very unlikely pairing for a number of reasons) that she could listen to me and my lil ramblings for ever cos I make her happy and make her laugh. A woman who is loved and who will be greatly missed. A woman who needs to know that is the case.
 
That's very sad, and very beautiful, at the same time. I always wondered why she was just your 'occasional' Mrs. Make sure you stay around here, even if the worst happens, just for support. :(
 
Why is she my "Occasional Mrs Shambles"? Many reasons. We were never gonna be a couple in the traditional sense. But that doesn't mean there wasn't a lotta love involved. Hard to explain really. And, truthfully, it really doesn't matter. If things had been different she would not be Occasional. But things were not different and it just had to be that way.

I won't be going anyway - certainly not for any extended periods. She now has internetz connection too (and landline for that matter - no mobile signal where she lives) so should be easier to stay in contact and much easier to know when she's feeling up to a visit and the like.
 
Sorry to hear about your bad news Shambles, gotta be tough on u mate.
Today is the 11th anniversary of my wife passing away.
Rather than just sadness today, I can now look back at my times with her and have a smile & little laugh to myself about things we had done together.
Time has made a difference as now it's easier to think of all the good times spent with her rather than concentrating on the fact that she is no longer here.
I feel sad for her parents as she was their first child and only daughter.
 
Well the inevitable seems to be happening.

I knew I'd never be good enough. :(
The relationship is on thin ice and unless I manage to sort something soon I'm gonna lose her.

I dunno, it seems no matter what I do it's never good enough.
She's always gotta have a dig about something.

It's like she's so perfect and if anything ever goes wrong it's always my fault.
It sucks cause I really wanted things to work out. :(
 
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