Mental Health The Rant Thread Vs. Really? How Does That Make You Feel?

fucking doctors (most of them, anyway)
by now i think i will be better off seeing a shaman or a faith healer than some prick who starts late, then reads exam results aloud like he's talking to a 2-year-old, mentioning in between that the consultation is only 30 minutes. and when i told him we can do with just 10 because all i need is for him to fill out a standard form, he says i have control issues.
guy gave me a headache!
 
fucking doctors (most of them, anyway)
by now i think i will be better off seeing a shaman or a faith healer than some prick who starts late, then reads exam results aloud like he's talking to a 2-year-old, mentioning in between that the consultation is only 30 minutes. and when i told him we can do with just 10 because all i need is for him to fill out a standard form, he says i have control issues.
guy gave me a headache!
Oh man I so hear ya hermana 💜
 
Fuck fuck fuckity Fuck!
Bah humbug … aaaahhhhhh!!!!!

Anyways … I’m feeling a bit disgruntled today but I still hope everyone else is doing okay

Big hug to anyone reading this that needs one 💕💜
 
Oh man I so hear ya hermana 💜
Fuck fuck fuckity Fuck!
Bah humbug … aaaahhhhhh!!!!!

Anyways … I’m feeling a bit disgruntled today but I still hope everyone else is doing okay

Big hug to anyone reading this that needs one 💕💜
mi linda!
so happy to see you around, and i really hope you are doing ok even if you're disgruntled.
i hope nothing serious?
sometimes we get upset by really stupid stuff.
un gran abrazo para ti!
y todo tus seres queridos!
 
The fucking mail is backed up so bad because of the now thankfully over postal strike that getting anything before new years i the mail is not realistic. I wanna order a few cd's on ebay but ill hold off
 
People treat me with open hatred and violence. No one is interested in speaking directly to me and asking my thoughts and feelings. It is like they never mattered. The only good thing I experienced in this life was animals. They don't hurt each other. I think it's smart and I love them.

All people ever talk about is 2 incidents in my life, and they don't care about the rest. It's like I don't even live and breathe. It's like i don't speak. People erased my whole existence with the 2 incidents and call the whole life I had evil. They don't care. I was thrown away. They don't care about anything. I believe people had the right to live thier best life. I don't like doctors or the government or the police. They erased my life. It doesn't matter any good feelings I had. It doesn't matter any physical or mental or emotional experiences I had. No one finds it sacred or special.

I'm the only one who cares about the details of my life and the sustenance I tried to get out of it. It's not much, what they did with society. Experience has been pretty limited. There are restrictions on experience. But I find it sad, no one else would understand the good I could experience. I don't know if I was emanating or projecting the inner good externally enough. I guess not because no one saw it.

I don't want to be abused with something illegal that people can demonize me for. What if I couldn't handle it. What if it tore me apart and ruined my mind and I needed it not to exist. Where will my empathy be. Do not ever abuse me with something that hurts my body that much. It doesn't even make sense. I am treated like I am a shell, just a shell that might be hiding evil underneath. You act like you uncovered evil under a facade. A fake person pretending to be good. My entire life was discarded because you thought you could treat my body like it was trash. It's not my fault I rub blankets and feel emotions.
 
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Kind of an odd complaint lol but - on enough SSRI's to make a sex drive an abstract concept, still doesn't stop blue balls from being a thing. It's a literal chore. I feel like a Green Day song lol.
 
I didn't get my nerountin today like i was told i was from the doctor. I got my suboxone just not my nerountin & honestly I'd be okay with getting just the nerountin and maybe the Suboxone I could wait a few more days.
So tomorrow, i have to fill out a 'see the doctor,' & 'request refills' paper and fill those out my listing I haven't got the medicine and shit I guess I'll have to see the damn doctor again and waste her time and everyones time so I can get the medicine.
Just suckd dealing with these doctors that oversee somewhere around 150 people.
 
Honestly fuck this winter. I think I have like major PTSD from breaking my leg last year. I haven't left my house really in weeks, this snow and ice and shit is killing me I don't even wanna step outside at all for fear of busting my ass.

Can't find a job for shit, and I've looked. Got kicked off my health insurance, right when I had to leave my job. Ain't got shit for money, can hardly move, in pain all fucking day, at the point where I'm so broke I don't even have weed and shit, day 6 no kratom, just kinda subsisting.

I am grateful to have the place I live, and the ability to chill and make some music, but fuck this does kind of suck majorly in a lot of ways... I'm definitely feeling the years
 
Wow nothing like having a family member completely screwing you over … if I had enough money I’d get the fuck out of NY and away from theses bitches for a while

I’m so mad because I’m deep down so hurt … but it doesn’t matter if you’re hurt when dealing with a cold person
 
Wow nothing like having a family member completely screwing you over … if I had enough money I’d get the fuck out of NY and away from theses bitches for a while

I’m so mad because I’m deep down so hurt … but it doesn’t matter if you’re hurt when dealing with a cold person
The only family that have yet to let me down are my folks, and even that has been spotty at times.

Road trip to Cali, the part that's not on fire tho
 
One of the housemates here at my sober living just knocked on my door and said that the van driver outside was telling him that I was supposed to have been discharged on the 23rd. And here it is almost 9pm, so shit, i get dressed to go speak with him and he was like 'yea you were supposed to have been gone on the 23rd' so I'm like no, i spoke with my therapist on Friday the 24th and when I asked about my discharged date she said that I still didn't have one, and because I've been asking her about my discharge date over and over she told me that she's not going to tell me until I need to know, so cool.
Now this happened tonight when I'm like what the fuck is going on? Well, luckily i have a place to go to back home, and things worked out there, but i needed an actual date, and if i would have known this sooner then I would have been gone from this fucking shit hole.
So tomorrow, I'm going to go and speak with her first thing in the morning to get some clarification on when my actual discharge date is, and I'm going to get my scripts all lined up and everything where I won't freak out by not having anything lined up.
Shit, I've already asked to speak with the case manager to get my records sent to the next place and it's like nothing is going on and boom you gotta go.
I'm staying the night here tonight, and i guess if I'm getting discharged tomorrow then i will just deal with that then, fuck this late night telling me shit that I've got to go.
 
When we talk about advice for life, many of us (in our distress) remember what our parents advised us to do. I have to say that my father did not give me any special advice, except perhaps that I should be persistent. My mother is now 90 years old, but she surprised me last time when she expressed her concern that I would ever get angry. In fact, I took her concern as advice and thought a lot about it.

In fact, in retrospect, I have noticed that my decisions, if made in anger, have not been good or have complicated my life.

I will take my mother's advice seriously. I will try not to get angry. I have noticed that it is often possible to resolve conflict situations in a way that both parties involved benefit from it. It is important not to take the position that we are the only ones who are right.

Giving makes us happy. And even if it is only by giving a part of ourselves.
 
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