Recovery The Professr's Recovery Diary

[ProfessrHyperdimensional]

Images displaying are a bit large. Sorry about that. Will try to use more modest sizing from now on.

5-MeO-DMT appears to be being used by a wildly different userbase. Like people from all walks of life are apparently drawn to it. I guess the same goes for any drug? Lol.



Not very professional but I think it might be a fun watch for some at least. There are so many of these on YT you might almost think they sell it in grocery stores. Jk. Poor joke.

I engaged in addict behavior today. Just saying. I didn't use. But this behavior needs to stop. IF it happens again I will explain it in detail.

 

[ProfessrHyperdimensional]

I need to alter my journaling here. I think it might be a trigger risk to discuss or share things about certain drugs in certain rays of light so to say.

Here's the deal then.

I may or may not be utilizing psychedelic medicine but chances are I am already planning on it and will document my experiences in the reports section and on my blog.

Also about marrying somebody right now. She just fell into my lap so to speak. On Twitter. Weird story. We are perfect for each other I feel but not ready to try and be partners for more than one reason. Anyways humans aren't perfect so like I mean we're not perfect at all actually.

So then I won't discuss drugs again in terms of using them actively in recovery or share media or links without becoming fully knowledgeable on the forum section guidelines, man.

Alright then hope everyone reading is doing well or if not doesn't give up and keeps getting back on the wagon if they are falling off.

 

[ProfessrHyperdimensional]

One page down. Wow. Kind of glad due to the crazy start of this. Kind of embarrassed to have been discussing what I was but hey I'm still posting in it.

Looking forward to page 3 as I will clean this up even more. I mean focus on sober things. This is simply a recovery diary now nothing more. No philosophical meanderings. No trip reports in this. SORRY.

Why was I getting caught up on being worried about professionalism? I don't even think that highly of modern society. Like professional shamans and medicine men who don't have bullshit standards to adhere to really outside really spiritual concepts are bosses to me. I guess real spiritual masters are too in that respect, like accomplished monks. I think I can tell who has accomplishment and who doesn't in terms of monastics but I'm not anything special myself. Just this discernment I have yet I also get that there are people who appeal to others more and they might be accomplished in ways I can't see and aren't meant for me I guess. In terms of offering me guidance.

Kind of getting too far off the goal here again oops.

Ok then.

I guess qigong isn't what is going to keep it all together so let me broaden my goals here and say holding a job is most important. I did have a 2nd interview at the plant-based cafe but my ego is like well what is cooking going to lead to in terms of making a lot of money when you aren't going to school to be a real chef but this place is too amazing to not work at and I might be able to move around and grow with them or even branch off into something else involving plant-based food in terms of career which would be a waking dream. This place is actually a restaurant yet I keep calling it a cafe! It is just in the name. The patio out back is like order at the counter so I mean kind of a cafe thing but the inside you are waited upon how fancy. It is rustic yet somehow modern I think. Really nice vibes. They get all their food local and it is "beyond organic" I guess. Like if they call me back I have to accept it I think. I could make money on the side posting ads on Craigslist for like PC and tech service as I was over a month ago now maybe and actually people were responding to it. I can also do other things like go back to finish my degree in the next year and start my own photography thing on the side and see where that goes.

So ya daily qigong and holding a job should keep my mind in the right place but daily meditation is my most important medicine I said now isn't it?

Ok so nice and steady now.

And fuck your backwards programming America. Look what D.A.R.E. did for me. Never dare kids to take drugs that you label as taboo.



I actually have like 5 videos I want to share in this post but let's see how many more I can. I don't expect everyone to click on everything I share.

 

[ProfessrHyperdimensional]

I don't get bad cravings like many do. My relapses tend to work in a more slippery manner. Honesty is very important here. 3 more videos and I'll browse other journals today and be in here tomorrow with something, not videos don't worry maybe pics and quotes.



Music is very helpful too. I would encourage people to get active in the music section here and say focus on things that lift you up and try not to get stuck on problems in a negative way. Yet I can't help others if I can't even help myself so I mean just trying to offer positive support I guess.



I am ready to be alone. Like in terms of this girl living with me moving out. It is just living with me is much better for her right now as she is away from a really bad lifestyle she was caught up in. I understand I shouldn't get so attached.