Ever hear about that point in time after years of drug abuse. When you don't care about anything? When the things you cared about mean less or close to nothing to you?
I am at this point. I no longer care about anything. Family is meaningless. I don't try to hard in school and I am failing. I don't get my daily tasks done. Its been wake up, do drugs, go to work, do drugs, smoke weed, and sleep for ages now. I have always smoked weed. I am bipolar, but anxiety kills me the most.
Getting the money isn't as easy anymore, so I have fallen out of the game. I don't care about those who I have used or ripped off. I have become manipulative and edgy. I fight with everyone all the time who loves me. I don't care about what is at stake. All that matters is using.
When I use it is the best part of the day. I don't eat that much anymore. I have these days where I cry and hurt the ones I love with the things I am saying and make threats. I do whatever it takes to get money for my next fix. I go to work blasted out of my mind. I am not scared. I have gotten charges. The biggest downfall is Mania.
Drug use is a game. There is a point for everyone where it becomes NEEDING instead of wanting. I cannot get through any day now without smoking Weed, Heroin, or Meth. They are my demons but they sure can fucking swim. I cant ask for help. I am on my own. There is no turning back.
My life is passing me by. I am losing out on so much. I don't even remember what I did yesterday most days. I am forgetful. I kiss my guys ass for the stuff because I NEED IT. I get anxious, cry, nervous, shaky, cant eat, cant sleep, body aches, a fever, look flushed, and very irritable. I am scared.
I want to stop it all. I want to get better. But drug use always holds me back. I am scared to withdrawal. Rehab is not an option right now. I have to much to lose. I cannot keep living a lie though everything that I say is a lie to make sure that I get my fix now. It feels like time is standing still. It has been years. I cannot cope.
Is this it? Is this the end? Will I recover? It all started with just ONCE but then that turned into EVERY DAY. Hard drugs are no joke. Anyone can get addicted. Drugs do not discriminate. Some of us are weaker then others. Some of us have very little to live for.
Are you at this point? Everything is falling away from you. You lost control. The drugs DO YOU. Your worthless. Your a liar. How did you recover. Is this end? Should I be ready.... Will I be damned to live like this until my early death..
I am at this point. I no longer care about anything. Family is meaningless. I don't try to hard in school and I am failing. I don't get my daily tasks done. Its been wake up, do drugs, go to work, do drugs, smoke weed, and sleep for ages now. I have always smoked weed. I am bipolar, but anxiety kills me the most.
Getting the money isn't as easy anymore, so I have fallen out of the game. I don't care about those who I have used or ripped off. I have become manipulative and edgy. I fight with everyone all the time who loves me. I don't care about what is at stake. All that matters is using.
When I use it is the best part of the day. I don't eat that much anymore. I have these days where I cry and hurt the ones I love with the things I am saying and make threats. I do whatever it takes to get money for my next fix. I go to work blasted out of my mind. I am not scared. I have gotten charges. The biggest downfall is Mania.
Drug use is a game. There is a point for everyone where it becomes NEEDING instead of wanting. I cannot get through any day now without smoking Weed, Heroin, or Meth. They are my demons but they sure can fucking swim. I cant ask for help. I am on my own. There is no turning back.
My life is passing me by. I am losing out on so much. I don't even remember what I did yesterday most days. I am forgetful. I kiss my guys ass for the stuff because I NEED IT. I get anxious, cry, nervous, shaky, cant eat, cant sleep, body aches, a fever, look flushed, and very irritable. I am scared.
I want to stop it all. I want to get better. But drug use always holds me back. I am scared to withdrawal. Rehab is not an option right now. I have to much to lose. I cannot keep living a lie though everything that I say is a lie to make sure that I get my fix now. It feels like time is standing still. It has been years. I cannot cope.
Is this it? Is this the end? Will I recover? It all started with just ONCE but then that turned into EVERY DAY. Hard drugs are no joke. Anyone can get addicted. Drugs do not discriminate. Some of us are weaker then others. Some of us have very little to live for.
Are you at this point? Everything is falling away from you. You lost control. The drugs DO YOU. Your worthless. Your a liar. How did you recover. Is this end? Should I be ready.... Will I be damned to live like this until my early death..