The Passion Of Jason

[jasonmccarthy5]

I feel like I have suffered for my sins. I have done nonstop drugs for over 10 years and I have lost everything and everyone that ever mattered to me. I desperately want to change and never go back to drugs, I say this now as I'm coming off Meth. How can a person truly change and do they really ever change? I just think it's just a circle that never ends, same routines, etc...I'm sure I've even done this on a message board b4.

 

[jasonmccarthy5]

I'm just a typical statistic on the bluelight dark side obviously. I just really hate myself and wish that I wasn't born. I know I wont kill myself (too much of a pussy). I seriously though am killing myself with the amount of cigs, drugs, and bad dieting. Not to sure how to make myself happy...I'm on 100 mgs of Fluvoxamine and 100 mgs of Perphanizine/Amitryptline...I just don't like life. Is there a easy way out of this? The pain and suffering I've caused myself and family is just beyond belief! Is there a way to induce a coma?

 

[It's a baby!]

The only way to get better is to realize you have a drug problem and STOP. You're already doing that, you're already on the road to recovery. I know what it's like to have drug use push your friends and family away from you, I think everyone on this board goes through that. It'll take time to regain their trust, but you can do it by truly honestly quitting drugs. I would ordinarily write a lot more but I'm really burned out something very disturbing happened to me today and I am recovering from a psychotic break.