So I am doing well with no trash. Booze, smut, cigs, and propyl (p-hex). A true hex on my life this beast is. It wants me dead. The beast possesses me I believe once I start getting all that trash in me. It can't get to me in my right mind. Enough about that however. Sinister stuff.
I am doing well with wholesome living. I am not having urges but due to the biological nature of a good chunk of my negative vice (does vice really have to be all bad?) urges are considered a part of being human. So while I have to learn how to process them maturely and rationally, some things have been helping transmute and deflect them. Qigong I feel is a powerful tool to improve one's mind and body. From the inside out. I am still such a lousy beginner. But I love it. I feel bad missing days of practicing it.
Anyways we live in a toxic Capitalist society that doesn't care about your health, wellness, nor life for that matter. Sounds grim but the shitbricks running my nation are dirty rotten pigs. I am not bashing all political parties and am not anti-government but come on this shit is sickly.
What if I get pushed into a corner somehow and it isn't my fault for stumbling into it? What will I do instead of grab a bottle of wine and fall off the right tracks to be happy in life? Hit the panic button...
Last resort option. I have used things in the past that were chemical but I feel did not harm me the way something like alcohol and propylhex have been killing me for the past 3 years now. SO when I say sobriety is the priority I mean from toxic life destroying things. Alcohol is just poison for me and I don't think it is something anyone should value as a tool to grow in life but hey people drink responsibly so I can't call it the devil but as for propyl dude I can't not call it sinister. However I used it for sinister purposes so I mean that is biased. I still can't encourage anyone to try it. Just from what it has done to me in the past. Alcohol did some shitty things but I felt like I was going to die on propylhexedrine on more than one occasion. I would only think of ingesting it once my inhibitions were stripped by ethanol. Literally stripped. The last relapses I was naked for the majority of them in front of screens. Do you see why I am implementing a panic button now? As I said a last resort and feel I don't need to rely on compounds to get better but if push comes to shove that baby is getting popped (random image but you get it).
Is that button a magic cure? No. But it would give a lesson a bottle of wine wouldn't in an eon.
I am doing well with wholesome living. I am not having urges but due to the biological nature of a good chunk of my negative vice (does vice really have to be all bad?) urges are considered a part of being human. So while I have to learn how to process them maturely and rationally, some things have been helping transmute and deflect them. Qigong I feel is a powerful tool to improve one's mind and body. From the inside out. I am still such a lousy beginner. But I love it. I feel bad missing days of practicing it.
Anyways we live in a toxic Capitalist society that doesn't care about your health, wellness, nor life for that matter. Sounds grim but the shitbricks running my nation are dirty rotten pigs. I am not bashing all political parties and am not anti-government but come on this shit is sickly.
What if I get pushed into a corner somehow and it isn't my fault for stumbling into it? What will I do instead of grab a bottle of wine and fall off the right tracks to be happy in life? Hit the panic button...
Last resort option. I have used things in the past that were chemical but I feel did not harm me the way something like alcohol and propylhex have been killing me for the past 3 years now. SO when I say sobriety is the priority I mean from toxic life destroying things. Alcohol is just poison for me and I don't think it is something anyone should value as a tool to grow in life but hey people drink responsibly so I can't call it the devil but as for propyl dude I can't not call it sinister. However I used it for sinister purposes so I mean that is biased. I still can't encourage anyone to try it. Just from what it has done to me in the past. Alcohol did some shitty things but I felt like I was going to die on propylhexedrine on more than one occasion. I would only think of ingesting it once my inhibitions were stripped by ethanol. Literally stripped. The last relapses I was naked for the majority of them in front of screens. Do you see why I am implementing a panic button now? As I said a last resort and feel I don't need to rely on compounds to get better but if push comes to shove that baby is getting popped (random image but you get it).
Is that button a magic cure? No. But it would give a lesson a bottle of wine wouldn't in an eon.