Everyone thinks I'm sexy again, including me. Ironically, I'm the only one that sees the subtle signs, the tell tale signs of being a junkie, the misc bruises that appear in various spots all over my body that most people don't see and the tracks I once again have to cover either with long sleeves or make up. Man it's gonna be a drag having to cut back....but I must! For now, I am enjoying the hell out of my 3 day weekend this week and next. The real drag about not using say 3-4 days a wk is that I'm literally dragging the days I'm not using. I barely manage to get to and from work and do my duties, then come home, go to bed. I don't want to go online, talk to friends, do any errands, forget about chores. I guess I'd better go about moving my yahoo blog to my damn profile, or whatever the fuckin instructions tell me to do.
Damn addiction crept up on me FAST! It sure didn't waste any time. They warned us about that in NA, and I knew it was true, but damn, that was fast, less than 3 months, actually 2 b4 I realized I've got a real habit again. I've cut back on the pills from 8 a day to 4. I'm happy about that. The meth is gonna be a pain in the ass though with the no energy, not wanting to do anything, and the damn fatigue. At least the supplements will reduce some of the unpleasant effects. Anyway, am listening to 95.5 KLOS, the same rock station I often listened to when I was 17 and attending Rolling Stones concerts with my pot buddy Tami. Damn that seems like 10 lifetimes ago and now I've gone from a rebellious, insecure, classic rock lovin 17 y/o to a sexy lookin middle aged meth addict.
I talked to Aimee, am supposed to stop by there. I figured since I didn't want this "sugar daddy" at least I'd give Aimee a shot at him. Why not? Not, mind you that I don't want his money, of course I do. What I don't want, however, is to have to fuck him frequently on a regular basis. That's why I haven't had too many sugar daddies before or now. I don't do heavy, frequent sex with someone I don't want, just so I can have large sums of cash frequently. This ought to be interesting if Aimee and I actually talk to him on the phone. I was going 2 show her his profile, what he wrote, then leave it up 2 her as 2 whether or not to call or see him. What I find incredible is that I banned him from emailing or IMing me on AFF and told him why. I told him 10 letters and IMs in one day comes off as way too demanding and desparate for me.
Yet, he still leaves 3-4 messages on yahoo messenger. I have made myself appear permanently offline to him. It's like this guy is a brick wall or something. Sooo, bet he hasn't met too many financially poor chicks with addictions to boot turn his offers of cash down, but this one did cause if there's one thing I don't do is high maintainance dudes. It would be ironic, though if this did end up working out for Aimee. If so, I'm happy to give Aimee a sugar daddy. She's been telling me how she needs to find a man with means to take care of her, so here's a possible chance for her. Am kinda debating whether to do more shit now or take a nap, but I think I'll grab a nap and relax. I always make sure I do eat and sleep.
Damn addiction crept up on me FAST! It sure didn't waste any time. They warned us about that in NA, and I knew it was true, but damn, that was fast, less than 3 months, actually 2 b4 I realized I've got a real habit again. I've cut back on the pills from 8 a day to 4. I'm happy about that. The meth is gonna be a pain in the ass though with the no energy, not wanting to do anything, and the damn fatigue. At least the supplements will reduce some of the unpleasant effects. Anyway, am listening to 95.5 KLOS, the same rock station I often listened to when I was 17 and attending Rolling Stones concerts with my pot buddy Tami. Damn that seems like 10 lifetimes ago and now I've gone from a rebellious, insecure, classic rock lovin 17 y/o to a sexy lookin middle aged meth addict.
I talked to Aimee, am supposed to stop by there. I figured since I didn't want this "sugar daddy" at least I'd give Aimee a shot at him. Why not? Not, mind you that I don't want his money, of course I do. What I don't want, however, is to have to fuck him frequently on a regular basis. That's why I haven't had too many sugar daddies before or now. I don't do heavy, frequent sex with someone I don't want, just so I can have large sums of cash frequently. This ought to be interesting if Aimee and I actually talk to him on the phone. I was going 2 show her his profile, what he wrote, then leave it up 2 her as 2 whether or not to call or see him. What I find incredible is that I banned him from emailing or IMing me on AFF and told him why. I told him 10 letters and IMs in one day comes off as way too demanding and desparate for me.
Yet, he still leaves 3-4 messages on yahoo messenger. I have made myself appear permanently offline to him. It's like this guy is a brick wall or something. Sooo, bet he hasn't met too many financially poor chicks with addictions to boot turn his offers of cash down, but this one did cause if there's one thing I don't do is high maintainance dudes. It would be ironic, though if this did end up working out for Aimee. If so, I'm happy to give Aimee a sugar daddy. She's been telling me how she needs to find a man with means to take care of her, so here's a possible chance for her. Am kinda debating whether to do more shit now or take a nap, but I think I'll grab a nap and relax. I always make sure I do eat and sleep.