the future

so in a lot of ways things are really looking up but I am also unsure about some other things in my life

The Positive.... I graduated college cum laude
I have a wonderful baby boy who I absolutely love
I cleaned up... I am no longer addicted or dependent on any substances
even ones that were prescribed to me

The Negative... I am not really sure what to do with my college degree
I am frustrated that I cant totally support myself financially and that my
parents do need to help me out... I feel like its a bit of a mark of shame
for my mom especially since I have a baby
I am not that that happy with my baby's father... we are still together
but I have a nagging feeling I could have done much better (at least
genetically speaking however I don't think he is a bad sperm donor ...
he is not relatively intelligent, athletic, and attractive (no he is not an
Abercrombie and Fitch model or an Olympic athlete or a scientist but
still....)) I am ashamed of his drinking though

My Plans.... Take the GRE this fall and hopefully get into a decent grad school with scholarships and grants......
I honestly don't know whether or not I will stay with Jesse's dad yet

Despite all of the negatives I am still at a much better place in my life than I think I have ever really been........ Hopefully things continue to get better

 

The answers will come. Always just keep doing the next right thing. Graduating college is huge, especially while caring for a child. Thinking about the future is good to an extent, but if you spend all your time thinking about the future you will miss opportunities to take action...

PS. What is your degree....got associates in electronics engineering, but I'm a chef....you never know what the future holds.