well its 20th of dec and we are so nearly ready for xmas, real tree up that smells so good, plenty of presents under the tree. just gotta do the big shop on thursday for everyone we aint got and boom. xmas dinner with the inlaws. shall be good i think. cant wait for thursday, i need some stress release even if its just a chinese with my best friend... could lose the house and god knows what will happen then!!! my own stupid fault tho....anyway gotta stay positive. i dont wanna talk about that
what a fucking weekend it was. no beer no drugs just time with my family and i will cherish this weekend forever in my heart cos i grew so much closer to my man and we even learned a little more about each other. the sex for one has been off the wall....dunno if its a combo of trying for a baby and us just being happy to be together with no interruptions in the winter months or if me having the implant out has stopped me being so moody. think it must be a bit of everything.
i cant stop thinking about having a baby. its becoming a constant thought to me, i know kierhan says he cant wait either but i dont think he wants it like i do.
all i keep thinkin is i may be pregnant, with my mums track record and me seeming to have followed in her footsteps with high fertility there is a possibility but i wont know until i am supposed to get my period and i dont even know when its due but to be sure i am going to wait until new years eve to do a test. that would be a pretty cool new years present.
big change, new life. one i have experienced before but was so young and inexperienced. i think i did a good job but this time i want it more and i have my sidekick there along the way, not the deadbeat dad of my 2nd born who by the way has had yet another kid that my little girl knows nothing about, his kids will populate the uk if he carries on.
i am still debating whether to take any drugs or drink anything on thursday. i gotta be serious about this pregnancy situ and if i think i may be then i cant be irresponsible.....
although it would be nice to have a night with my nearest and dearest again. also there's new years. the day i will be testing. i will be going out if its positive but i wont be joining in the illegal fun just go for the music and celebrate.
the bitch called again today..probs wants money no doubt. she gone....i do miss her a little but more miss the person i thought she was not who she really is so am suckin it up she can disappear.
think i need to make some cheese on toast. am so hungry right now just cant be bothered to move and i am enjoyin writing my blog. i really need to stick to this. i think its good for me.
gotta keep in a positive mood today cos i have been getting mardy with my loved ones and they dont deserve it one bit. especially kierhan. he gets the brunt end of my moods. i miss him so much when he is at work i wish he realised.
right well i think i better stop writing now and get something done. latersssss
what a fucking weekend it was. no beer no drugs just time with my family and i will cherish this weekend forever in my heart cos i grew so much closer to my man and we even learned a little more about each other. the sex for one has been off the wall....dunno if its a combo of trying for a baby and us just being happy to be together with no interruptions in the winter months or if me having the implant out has stopped me being so moody. think it must be a bit of everything.
i cant stop thinking about having a baby. its becoming a constant thought to me, i know kierhan says he cant wait either but i dont think he wants it like i do.
all i keep thinkin is i may be pregnant, with my mums track record and me seeming to have followed in her footsteps with high fertility there is a possibility but i wont know until i am supposed to get my period and i dont even know when its due but to be sure i am going to wait until new years eve to do a test. that would be a pretty cool new years present.
big change, new life. one i have experienced before but was so young and inexperienced. i think i did a good job but this time i want it more and i have my sidekick there along the way, not the deadbeat dad of my 2nd born who by the way has had yet another kid that my little girl knows nothing about, his kids will populate the uk if he carries on.
i am still debating whether to take any drugs or drink anything on thursday. i gotta be serious about this pregnancy situ and if i think i may be then i cant be irresponsible.....
although it would be nice to have a night with my nearest and dearest again. also there's new years. the day i will be testing. i will be going out if its positive but i wont be joining in the illegal fun just go for the music and celebrate.
the bitch called again today..probs wants money no doubt. she gone....i do miss her a little but more miss the person i thought she was not who she really is so am suckin it up she can disappear.
think i need to make some cheese on toast. am so hungry right now just cant be bothered to move and i am enjoyin writing my blog. i really need to stick to this. i think its good for me.
gotta keep in a positive mood today cos i have been getting mardy with my loved ones and they dont deserve it one bit. especially kierhan. he gets the brunt end of my moods. i miss him so much when he is at work i wish he realised.
right well i think i better stop writing now and get something done. latersssss