The EADD Mental Health Support Thread

[monstanoodle]

Really hope it helps you to be able to function scroo mate
And yes yes yes please do be careful amnesia - Take care of yerself as you deserve goodness

Jeeez Drs. / GPs / Therapists / et. fuckin. al. can either be absolutely fucking amazing or absolutely fucking devistating to your mind's health.
Can still remember the feelings of walking into my Psychiatrist's office feeling utterly horrible and then leaving feeling so much worse and prescribed one med that made me want to kill myself (Mirtazapine - subjective ofcourse) and one that took away my fear of death! (Buspirone, which isn't a subjective - It's purely a shitty, useless and ill-prescribed pharm ever in my eyes).
Was lucky to walk away from that one. I demanded that I didn't see her anymore and saw someone else. Gave up with them in the end

I was once given Flupentixol for my Anxiety by a GP who wasn't my regular one???? <------ Said long-term GP who I still see today was also confused t'fuck as to why that was done.

I saw my wonderful GP yesterday infact. Last week I told her that things were really, really hard at the moment and that I may need to up doses of most of my meds, but said that I'd give it another week to see if I could stick to the doses... I couldn't, was drinking loads again (with terrible amnesia, scarily so), self harming, had a dream about jumping off the Golden Gate bridge , all my joints were hurting every day almost constantly so I was taking a lot of Ibuprofen which did my tummy no good and...
... I wasn't suicidal per se, but I was thinking every night about how long I wanted to live - How long I wished to carry on knowing that I have the option to cease existence when I wish.

The appointment wasn't placed on the computer system, so I was told to wait my the receptionist to see if she could see me.
The star she is I only had to wait 5-10mins and she was asking me about all this - I was worried that I was taking up her time but she said it was fine.
She asked if I was suicidal. She really cares and it's insane how much she trusts me, knowing that I've a whole host of addiction problems.
When I said that I would need to up my Codeine and Diazepam she was fine with it, she even asked me if I wanted to up my Temazepam :O
But I said no and that it was working well after being on Zolpidem for a while.
.... I mean.... Temazepam is a C(ontrolled)D(rug) and any other GP wouldn't even go with me asking to up my other meds!!!!
I let her know that when things settle down I should be quite able to reduce the doses back down again fairly quickly.

She's a real gem, so understanding and knows I'm trying hard. I constantly am reminded how lucky I am to have such a great GP because I've had some uncaring ones and heard from many people on here and everywhere else that they've had very unsympathetic ones.
The term "Text-Book-Doctor" is absolutely spot on.

Much love, luck and hope to you all, and know I've sympathy for you and I'd imagine vice versa

p.s. Sorry! Proper rant that. Needed it off my chest really.

 

[monstanoodle]

I read quite allot about the discontinuation syndrome from coming off of it and that does concern me, I have read about using Prozac to soften the symptoms but I do not tolerate SSRIs at all, Prozac makes really sick very quickly as do all the other SSRIs I've tried.

Does anyone have experience of this or could offer and real world advice, I'd be very interested to here it.

That's really harsh man! Proper sorry to hear that you've had to take 2 steps back It's felt like that for me mate.
I've not experienced bad withdrawals from Venlafaxine as I wasn't on it long (didn't agree with me to put it lightly lol) but my... "friend" is, and one med that might be able to help with the tapering process is Paroxetine.
It has a longer half-life than Venlafaxine but - even when coming off Venlafaxine - it's recommended that you should go on Fluoxetine due to the even longer half-life...

So it's not going to be a pretty time, but things like Propanolol and coming off Venlafaxine extremely slowly and the reduction doses being really small, like get them to prepare a solution where you can take X-mg in a drop of a pipette and perhaps dosing small doses a couple of times a day.
But please speak to yer Dr. about these options. Good luck mate ~ Wish you well

(Again I'm sorry about the rambling! I've not slept in... about 40-45hrs)

 

[scrooloose]

Thanks for kind words MONSTA. The antiypsychotics definitely dampened down odd thought patterns.Note to self - KEEP OFF THE FUCKING STIMS.

Rant away monsta.Hope things settle for ya and you get sleep soon.I know what you mean about rambling.

 

[Allein]

- it's recommended that you should go on Fluoxetine due to the even longer half-life...

Can't do SSRIs Fluoxetine makes me projectile vomit within an hour of taking at and the others give equally unpleasant results all the way up to internal bleeding, I'm hoping I may be one of the luck ones and don't suffer discontinuation syndrome, the stats suggest many people don't. I already get dizzy spells and that fuzzy electric shock feeling, I think this is due to the short half life.

I'm kinda determined to bite the bullet and get off the stuff, not heard of using Propanolol, always thought I should be giving that a go anyhow. The always say reduce slowly but I think the XR tabs only come in 150 and 75mgs and the IR ones didnt agree with me at all.

The Etiz I got was proper blister packed Etilaam, much better than the samples of the blue cote horrible tasting ons I tried the other week and really very cheap, I can drop 1 during the day if I'm feeling anxious and at the moment that is helping quite a bit, new job and stresses etc.

Hope you're feeling a bit better in yourself Monsta, hows the booze issue going, it's been 2 ( yep2) years for me, I still want a drink at least once a week if not more but I'm hanging in there, it was making such a mess of my physically, stomach bleeds, constant bowel problems and just generally feeling like shite and piling on weight,.

All the very best to ya

 

[monstanoodle]

Can't do SSRIs Fluoxetine makes me projectile vomit within an hour of taking at and the others give equally unpleasant results all the way up to internal bleeding, I'm hoping I may be one of the luck ones and don't suffer discontinuation syndrome, the stats suggest many people don't. I already get dizzy spells and that fuzzy electric shock feeling, I think this is due to the short half life.

Oh I wasn't suggesting that you should do (as it makes you proper ill!), purely that that will be the Drs' first line of thought.
Yea it's dem fookin short half-lives again!

I'm kinda determined to bite the bullet and get off the stuff, not heard of using Propanolol, always thought I should be giving that a go anyhow. The always say reduce slowly but I think the XR tabs only come in 150 and 75mgs and the IR ones didnt agree with me at all.

The Etiz I got was proper blister packed Etilaam, much better than the samples of the blue cote horrible tasting ons I tried the other week and really very cheap, I can drop 1 during the day if I'm feeling anxious and at the moment that is helping quite a bit, new job and stresses etc.

Hope you're feeling a bit better in yourself Monsta, hows the booze issue going, it's been 2 ( yep2) years for me, I still want a drink at least once a week if not more but I'm hanging in there, it was making such a mess of my physically, stomach bleeds, constant bowel problems and just generally feeling like shite and piling on weight,.

All the very best to ya

The Propanolol would be useful for any shaking and other Adrenaline-based anxiety symptoms. It'll only be you who could judge if it would help
Tis really good that you're able to be calm from just the one

Cheers mate yea I'm doing a bit better, calmer and more level-headed than I was feeling a fortnight ago. I'm not drinking as much as I was but still do have the odd lapse, and that's when I wake up with an unfinished drink beside my bed and think...
"Awwwwnooooo fuuuuuck..... I'm gunna have to check every single form of communication I have to see what stupid shit I've typed / said / done!!!!"
Then find myself with a fuck load of bruises and cuts and scrapes
No fun.
But I definitely am in more control with my upped meds

And all the very best to you good sir ~

Eeeee, guess I should go make myself useful somewhere....

 

[kace]

I'm so nervous about going to the doctors today. I just want benzos to help me taper. I want to be honest, say I'm addicted but want medical help tapering off, but this might go tits up. Will they refuse to help? Will they just tell me to go cold turkey? Will it be on my permanent record? Will they take my license away? :/

Maybe I should just say the symptoms I'm feeling- anxiety, agrophobia, insomnia, panic attacks, depersonalization, hyperventilating, muscle spasms, shaking, nausea, depression, twitching, etc. If I admit I'm an addict, I'm worried it'll be on my record forever and they will never trust me again. I just want to taper. :/

 

[monstanoodle]

I can fully appreciate your worry about this kace.
Do you know your GP well? Whomever they are they will want the good ol' "honesty is the best policy".
And to be honest about being honest, it's likely the best option.

How much are you taking of what?
I mean they're there to help you, to keep you safe and well, and if they know that you have a large tolerance then they will be duty-bound to make sure you don't end up having horrible and potentially very nasty withdrawals.
It will go on your GP's medical records but there is doctor-patient-confidentiality so such information will not be provided to anyone else unless it's deemed absolutely necessary.

I sort of want to ask you what license it is that you fear they will take away but I'm going to practice the BLer to BLer confidentiality law

Honestly, really don't get too worked up, and be as honest as you can be. It will be for your best in the long run matey.
Good luck

 

[scrooloose]

It's interesting how different meds affect different people. Sertraline (which is basically prozac?) is the first AD i have taken too and Olanzapine as an antipsychotic.

Even the sedating Mirtazapine gave me horrible akathisia.I've been through hell with different meds,depixol being the worst.

It's all trial and error.

 

[kace]

Thank so much for responding monstanoodle.

I don't know my doctor, it's like a zoo in there, a different doctor everytime. I'm worried I'm going to get one doctor who is not a nice guy, when I was 20 after going in for physical problems, I then asked embarrassed as hell if I could on the contraceptive pill. He got so angry and lectured me, saying that I couldn't just waltz into the doctors asking to be put on it.

I was taking around 4mg-6mg (sometimes more) a day of etizolam a day, for about 9 months. I think I'm going to be completely honest about useage/ time, but say it's Xanax, as I know they will not have a clue what Etizolam is.

Haha , I'm worried they will tell the DVLA, and get my driving license taken away (even though I don't have a car at the moment). Other than that, thank god for patient- doctor confidentiality.

One more thing, I've been thinking of taking a list of the physical and mental symptoms I've been experincing. I'm worried I'll freeze up/ not remember them when put on the spot. Would giving the doctor a list help my case or will I just seem like some nutter who's just copied them from the net to get a prescription?

 

[scrooloose]

^you're probably right thinking they won't know about etizolam.I'm still having issues with it.They don't know this.I'm self medicating because i get morning/ daytime anxiety,they won't give me anything.Sertraline helped in the beginning,but tbh i have been my own worst enemy at times.Good luck.

(not really important but i've deleted a post that's made me feel a bit self concious tbh,posted a while back)

 

[Ceres]

Does your doctor even know you have a driving license? I'm pretty sure they won't tell the DVLA, the DVLA website actually has pages of advice for GP's and what their obligations are, might be worth having a look on there if you have time.

But honesty really is the best policy. I would also agree, tell them it's xanax and you need to taper off it.

 

[Allein]

Definitely write stuff down xanax is a good call as it shas a short half life like Etiz, your doses are not to high so a modest Diaz taper should get you back on track.

I've admitted to Benzo use numerous times the last time being when I eneded up in hospital after a motorbike accident, I had to tell them as they were pumping me up with morphine and anyway I needed my missus to bring in my meds.

They could not have been more helpful, they even offered me some as a stop gap and them always reminded me to take them, I've also had treatment for alcohol and drug abuse and I know none of it has ever been divulged outside of the medical profession. This is partly because they are so crap at such things, but also because as a rule medical people respect you for being honest and often this stuff never even get written down.

Your doc should be putting you on a Diazepam taper, if not I'd initailly suggest another doctor of just arrange an appointment at your local addiction service, they have doctors that can help wit such things.

In the mean time donlt mess with your current Etiz regime, it can wait.

 

[Ceres]

@ atm23 - I've been tapering myself off imipramine over the past month or so, with no ill effects whatsoever. Infact it's really nice to feel like myself again. Helpfully imipramine only comes in 25mg pills so it's easy to reduce down from the max dose gradually though. Try and focus on all the good aspects of coming off an antidepressant anyway, brain zaps and other withdrawal symptoms aren't 100% guaranteed to happen if you taper off properly...

 

[monstanoodle]

It's interesting how different meds affect different people. Sertraline (which is basically prozac?) is the first AD i have taken too and Olanzapine as an antipsychotic.

Even the sedating Mirtazapine gave me horrible akathisia.I've been through hell with different meds,depixol being the worst.

It's all trial and error.

Aye man - One person's worst chemical nightmare can be another chemical saviour. It's a case of good ol' subjectivity.
Mirtazapine didn't even sedate me, when I've heard that it would knock others the fuck out I wondered what was wrong with me! :D
It made me suicidal not an hour or so after absorbing it into my blood I'd say. It was really fuckin weird

Thank so much for responding monstanoodle.

I don't know my doctor, it's like a zoo in there, a different doctor everytime. I'm worried I'm going to get one doctor who is not a nice guy, when I was 20 after going in for physical problems, I then asked embarrassed as hell if I could on the contraceptive pill. He got so angry and lectured me, saying that I couldn't just waltz into the doctors asking to be put on it.

I was taking around 4mg-6mg (sometimes more) a day of etizolam a day, for about 9 months. I think I'm going to be completely honest about useage/ time, but say it's Xanax, as I know they will not have a clue what Etizolam is.

Haha , I'm worried they will tell the DVLA, and get my driving license taken away (even though I don't have a car at the moment). Other than that, thank god for patient- doctor confidentiality.

One more thing, I've been thinking of taking a list of the physical and mental symptoms I've been experincing. I'm worried I'll freeze up/ not remember them when put on the spot. Would giving the doctor a list help my case or will I just seem like some nutter who's just copied them from the net to get a prescription?

Yer quite welcome Kace

--- Edit --- Nice addition atm

Urg I know those Drs - You walk into their office and instantly feel like a criminal
And what the fuck?!?! He gave you shit for asking for the pill!!!! That's disgraceful, you could have made an official complaint for that which would end up in him getting a MASSIVE bollocking... What a cock!

Yes it may be better to say that it's a Benzo that they will have heard of. There are still GPs who have to look in their books to find out about substances that have been prescribed in this country since the 70's!
Nooooo they cannot talk to the DVLA at all. So no worries about that

And that's a very good idea to take a list with you. When you're firstly suffering from these symptoms and feeling scared about the outcome, it's a dead wise idea to do so **nods**
Tell the GP that you brought it due to fear of missing out possible important information.

Another thing to think about is whether it would be better to see a female GP or a male - You have a right to see who you would feel most comfortable with.

 

[kace]

^you're probably right thinking they won't know about etizolam.I'm still having issues with it.They don't know this.I'm self medicating because i get morning/ daytime anxiety,they won't give me anything.Sertraline helped in the beginning,but tbh i have been my own worst enemy at times.Good luck.

(not really important but i've deleted a post that's made me feel a bit self concious tbh,posted a while back)

Yeah, they don't have a clue yet. I know it's my fault for abusing it, so part of me doesn't want to tell them as the more people who complain, the faster it will get banned. Also you shouldn't feel self concious about posting anything on here.

Does your doctor even know you have a driving license? I'm pretty sure they won't tell the DVLA, the DVLA website actually has pages of advice for GP's and what their obligations are, might be worth having a look on there if you have time.

But honesty really is the best policy. I would also agree, tell them it's xanax and you need to taper off it.

Haha this is very true!! I hope not. If so, deny! I shall read through the DVLA page though, great idea.

Thanks again atm23, you are amazing. Glad you survived the motorbike accident and the doctors were helpful and understanding.

I'm so lucky my vendor ticked me 10 till I next get paid. I would never ever do cold turkey again if I can help it.

Yer quite welcome Kace

--- Edit --- Nice addition atm

Urg I know those Drs - You walk into their office and instantly feel like a criminal
And what the fuck?!?! He gave you shit for asking for the pill!!!! That's disgraceful, you could have made an official complaint for that which would end up in him getting a MASSIVE bollocking... What a cock!

Yes it may be better to say that it's a Benzo that they will have heard of. There are still GPs who have to look in their books to find out about substances that have been prescribed in this country since the 70's!
Nooooo they cannot talk to the DVLA at all. So no worries about that

And that's a very good idea to take a list with you. When you're firstly suffering from these symptoms and feeling scared about the outcome, it's a dead wise idea to do so **nods**
Tell the GP that you brought it due to fear of missing out possible important information.

Another thing to think about is whether it would be better to see a female GP or a male - You have a right to see who you would feel most comfortable with.

I wish I did file a complaint, was far too shy to at the time! Instead was too scared to go back. Really? They won't tell the DVLA? Thank god. As driving is awesome and I would love to have a car again. I've never had a female doctor at this place, I'm happy to get a male as long as it's not that douchebag! If it's him, god forbid, I'll try again on Monday.

Thank you so much everyone. You've been so helpful. I'll tell you how it goes.

 

[scrooloose]

Kace,yeah your right about the self concious thing. I was flicking back through old posts .Just a fleeting thought,now i dunno why i deleted it.

 

[Allein]

http://www.benzo.org.uk/bzequiv.htm

Thank you so much everyone. You've been so helpful. I'll tell you how it goes.

Not at all this is what we are here for that and taking the piss out of Spade

 

[YellowPolkaDotHalo]

Can see a lot of existential angst and woes in here if he doesn't come back then. How are we going to cope?

 

[Allein]

Sertraline (which is basically prozac?)

Really I found them totally different, what so you base the similarity on just fact they are both SSRI's ? I suspect there a lot more a it, Citolproam and Prozac had very different effects. I'm not chemist but I suspect there ism much more going on than the straight SSRI action.

 

[scrooloose]

Really I found them totally different, what so you base the similarity on just fact they are both SSRI's ? I suspect there a lot more a it, Citolproam and Prozac had very different effects. I'm not chemist but I suspect there ism much more going on than the straight SSRI action.

Just randomly mentioned to my shrink on a low day about trying prozac and he said there is very little difference between the two.A doctor may have said different,i dunno.