The Dream About the Blonde-Haired Girl.
by Rewired
01/01/02
(circa 9 PM)
“Just as much as we see in others we have in ourselves.”
-- William Hazlitt.
I was living in a house with my father and my two younger sisters. I don't remember mom being around. Dad had apparently rented a movie from the store and left it on the top of the television and told me to watch it. It seemed as if the video was important, but I don't recall if I ever watched it or what it dealt with.
Shortly thereafter, all four of us decided to drive in the winter weather and take the video back to the store, and pick up some groceries in the meantime. I don't know who drove there, but on our way back I was driving. Just as we were about the pull into the driveway, either dad or I remembered that we had dropped off the video but forgotten to get the groceries, so I turned back out the driveway and kept driving -- but in the direction we had been going in.
As I was driving, I apparently `fell asleep' and had a weird dream. At some point I was startled awake by something that occurred abruptly in the dream to find that I had crashed the car in `reality', sending my father, my two sisters and I flying everywhere in the snow. After we landed, I asked if everyone was okay. From Eve, the eldest of my two younger sisters, I almost sensed humor over the entire situation. Linda seemed frustrated, almost disappointed, shaking her head and sighing. As for dad, he seemed half upset and half disappointed, and I worried that perhaps he had hurt his back. I got emergency state of mind, was ready to rush him to the hospital if need be. I don’t remember if it was needed.
There was then this long gap that I cannnot remember. The following either followed the above, or was actually the `dream' I had had before I had crashed the car.
I found myself in this dark-lit restaurant I liked to hang out in, writing and watching people. I suddenly took notice of this waitress in the dining room. She was by the drink bar to the left of the counter. She was fairly attractive, but she looked like a zombie; as if she wasn’t all there. I instantly recalled seeing her before, but I couldn't at first recall from where. It was at the tip of my tongue for the longest time -- then I realized I must have met her while I was in an altered state of consciousness.
I thought harder, and vaguely recalled meeting her during an abduction episode. Then I knew I had been in a booth with her in this very restaurant, where we had talked about our experiences. At that time, I recalled that she had given me a box. In the box were some computer discs and what she described as pictures, which I had taken to be illustrations from her encounters.
After I recalled this, I looked up from my table and at the space behind the counter, where you order and get your food. I met eyes with a fat man, and casually looked away and tried to hide my face. I felt he was of high authority, and that perhaps he was part of this. He seemed to be getting suspicious of me, judging from the way he had looked at me. I feared he knew I was onto something. That perhaps he knew that I knew that I had secret relations with this girl. I tried to keep it cool and act casual.
I left for home. Upon getting home from the restaurant, I went to the downstairs computer, where I thought I’d put the box of disks she’d given me shortly before the memory of receiving them had disappeared in my amnesia. I found them there, confirmation that my memories were correct. Inside the box I also found some strange red folder-like things, within which were a whole bunch of nudie pictures of the waitress girl. I immediately figured that these must have been the “pictures” she’d given me, which I’d taken to be illustrations. I was upset that I'd forgotten about them for so long; that I hadn't gotten back to her or even opened the box. Yet the box was open. Who’d opened the box and gone through them? I worried that perhaps my parents had.
Then there's a period in the dream that's fuzzy - perhaps a memory that came to me as I was looking through the pictures and thinking about the waitress. I am in what seems to be a hotel room, and there is a heated argument going on between me, the waitress, and the fat man from the restaurant. Due to something said or done in that room, I was sure there was another girl involved, though not necessarily in a sexual way. I don’t even think I had sexual relations with the girl who’d given me pornography, though I do recall her as being attractive and me wanting to do as much.
When the fuzzy memory ended, I walked away from the pictures, out of the room and went into the dining room. There, I found myself talking to a guy who seemed to be an authority figure in the matter. Unlike the big fat man, however, he seemed to be on my side -- not a figure to be so worried about or threatened by. He almost seems to be me.
I was talking to him when the fat guy from the earlier restaurant thing and the missing part I can’t remember came in from around the corner, from the side of the dining room opposite the door. I was sitting by the wall by the corner, acting casual about seeing him. I was hoping he wouldn’t recognize me for who I was, but he did. He made some reference to my claim before (perhaps in the hotel room) about being in the Army. I had lied to him -- I wasn't in the Army, I hated the Army. But I played it out so he wouldn't catch me in a lie. I went on to talk about it while putting on my army boots, saying how it was rough being in the Army for me. I didn’t like talking about it because there were some things I couldn’t say about it - implying “top secret things” - so I liked keeping all together silent about it.
Somehow, I managed to escape the house.
Then suddenly I'm in completely different surroundings. I was in the back of a train or a bus or a big van or something without windows, and in the booth behind me, the seat farthest back, there was a girl. I found that I was very fond of her. We got to talking, and she said we should exchange e-mails. I was very surprised that she had an e-mail for some reason. I suddenly realized that this may very well be "the other girl involved".
I’d figured she was an abductee, but when I asked her, she told me "not exactly". I asked her if she was a hybrid. She didn't answer. I got the impression that there was a lot more going on between her and I that I knew about. A whole lot more. I felt as if a secret was being kept from me by her. I almost felt a sympathy in her toward me. A worry. An empathy.
“What are you...?” I tried to ask.
She wanted to avoid the question, I could tell, but she knew she couldn't. She merely told me that she didn't think she should tell me; that she wanted to, but she couldn't; that I wouldn't understand. And she just looked at me deeply.
It was only then that I let her entire face sink in. She wore a black winter’s hat over her blond hair, and she had deep blue eyes. Very sweet eyes, but also very sad. I felt certain that they were sad towards me.
There was some realization there on the tip of my mind, like an itch I couldn't reach to scratch.
by Rewired
01/01/02
(circa 9 PM)
“Just as much as we see in others we have in ourselves.”
-- William Hazlitt.
I was living in a house with my father and my two younger sisters. I don't remember mom being around. Dad had apparently rented a movie from the store and left it on the top of the television and told me to watch it. It seemed as if the video was important, but I don't recall if I ever watched it or what it dealt with.
Shortly thereafter, all four of us decided to drive in the winter weather and take the video back to the store, and pick up some groceries in the meantime. I don't know who drove there, but on our way back I was driving. Just as we were about the pull into the driveway, either dad or I remembered that we had dropped off the video but forgotten to get the groceries, so I turned back out the driveway and kept driving -- but in the direction we had been going in.
As I was driving, I apparently `fell asleep' and had a weird dream. At some point I was startled awake by something that occurred abruptly in the dream to find that I had crashed the car in `reality', sending my father, my two sisters and I flying everywhere in the snow. After we landed, I asked if everyone was okay. From Eve, the eldest of my two younger sisters, I almost sensed humor over the entire situation. Linda seemed frustrated, almost disappointed, shaking her head and sighing. As for dad, he seemed half upset and half disappointed, and I worried that perhaps he had hurt his back. I got emergency state of mind, was ready to rush him to the hospital if need be. I don’t remember if it was needed.
There was then this long gap that I cannnot remember. The following either followed the above, or was actually the `dream' I had had before I had crashed the car.
I found myself in this dark-lit restaurant I liked to hang out in, writing and watching people. I suddenly took notice of this waitress in the dining room. She was by the drink bar to the left of the counter. She was fairly attractive, but she looked like a zombie; as if she wasn’t all there. I instantly recalled seeing her before, but I couldn't at first recall from where. It was at the tip of my tongue for the longest time -- then I realized I must have met her while I was in an altered state of consciousness.
I thought harder, and vaguely recalled meeting her during an abduction episode. Then I knew I had been in a booth with her in this very restaurant, where we had talked about our experiences. At that time, I recalled that she had given me a box. In the box were some computer discs and what she described as pictures, which I had taken to be illustrations from her encounters.
After I recalled this, I looked up from my table and at the space behind the counter, where you order and get your food. I met eyes with a fat man, and casually looked away and tried to hide my face. I felt he was of high authority, and that perhaps he was part of this. He seemed to be getting suspicious of me, judging from the way he had looked at me. I feared he knew I was onto something. That perhaps he knew that I knew that I had secret relations with this girl. I tried to keep it cool and act casual.
I left for home. Upon getting home from the restaurant, I went to the downstairs computer, where I thought I’d put the box of disks she’d given me shortly before the memory of receiving them had disappeared in my amnesia. I found them there, confirmation that my memories were correct. Inside the box I also found some strange red folder-like things, within which were a whole bunch of nudie pictures of the waitress girl. I immediately figured that these must have been the “pictures” she’d given me, which I’d taken to be illustrations. I was upset that I'd forgotten about them for so long; that I hadn't gotten back to her or even opened the box. Yet the box was open. Who’d opened the box and gone through them? I worried that perhaps my parents had.
Then there's a period in the dream that's fuzzy - perhaps a memory that came to me as I was looking through the pictures and thinking about the waitress. I am in what seems to be a hotel room, and there is a heated argument going on between me, the waitress, and the fat man from the restaurant. Due to something said or done in that room, I was sure there was another girl involved, though not necessarily in a sexual way. I don’t even think I had sexual relations with the girl who’d given me pornography, though I do recall her as being attractive and me wanting to do as much.
When the fuzzy memory ended, I walked away from the pictures, out of the room and went into the dining room. There, I found myself talking to a guy who seemed to be an authority figure in the matter. Unlike the big fat man, however, he seemed to be on my side -- not a figure to be so worried about or threatened by. He almost seems to be me.
I was talking to him when the fat guy from the earlier restaurant thing and the missing part I can’t remember came in from around the corner, from the side of the dining room opposite the door. I was sitting by the wall by the corner, acting casual about seeing him. I was hoping he wouldn’t recognize me for who I was, but he did. He made some reference to my claim before (perhaps in the hotel room) about being in the Army. I had lied to him -- I wasn't in the Army, I hated the Army. But I played it out so he wouldn't catch me in a lie. I went on to talk about it while putting on my army boots, saying how it was rough being in the Army for me. I didn’t like talking about it because there were some things I couldn’t say about it - implying “top secret things” - so I liked keeping all together silent about it.
Somehow, I managed to escape the house.
Then suddenly I'm in completely different surroundings. I was in the back of a train or a bus or a big van or something without windows, and in the booth behind me, the seat farthest back, there was a girl. I found that I was very fond of her. We got to talking, and she said we should exchange e-mails. I was very surprised that she had an e-mail for some reason. I suddenly realized that this may very well be "the other girl involved".
I’d figured she was an abductee, but when I asked her, she told me "not exactly". I asked her if she was a hybrid. She didn't answer. I got the impression that there was a lot more going on between her and I that I knew about. A whole lot more. I felt as if a secret was being kept from me by her. I almost felt a sympathy in her toward me. A worry. An empathy.
“What are you...?” I tried to ask.
She wanted to avoid the question, I could tell, but she knew she couldn't. She merely told me that she didn't think she should tell me; that she wanted to, but she couldn't; that I wouldn't understand. And she just looked at me deeply.
It was only then that I let her entire face sink in. She wore a black winter’s hat over her blond hair, and she had deep blue eyes. Very sweet eyes, but also very sad. I felt certain that they were sad towards me.
There was some realization there on the tip of my mind, like an itch I couldn't reach to scratch.
