The Desert That Killed Me.
7/29/04
I don't know what to think about this,
I don't know what to do.
I'm not angry at you, I just fucking
hate everything right now
but I know you've got to do
what you've got to do,
and I've just got to bear it,
got to accept it,
because it doesn't make
a difference anyway,
and to think that you'd come
back for me, abandon your family,
it's just greedy.
It's just tat I finally want someone
so bad, and this has got to happen
-- do even you know how
rare you are to me? --
but deep down, even closer,
I know I knew it all along, I knew
something would happen all along.
you couldn't spit it out at first,
beating around the bush, but I
felt what you were thinking:
it hit me so hard I was mutilated by
the shockwave a week ago,
a week before you said a word of it
I felt it brewing in your head
and it makes me choke,
it drives me mad,
I don't want to be alone
and I can't bear to consider
another right now: I've got my
sights set on you so strong
Do even you know how
rare you are to me?
It's being without you that
kills, not just being lonely.
And I'm sick of being sad and hopeless,
of being so broken and homeless,
and if home is here the heart is,
it's in a desert that seems to be
a million light years away from me:
the desert that swallowed
you like a black hole:
the desert that killed me.
Love was sustinence,
now it laves me thirsty
and baking in the moonlight...
and I know I said I'd talk to you tonight,
but I just can't, all right?
I don't know what to think or say about this,
there's nothing I can do:
I know you've got to do
what you've got to do,
and I've just got to bear it,
got to accept it,
because it doesn't make
a difference anyway.
I'll just sit here tonight,
curse the desert that killed me
by stealing the Califonia sunrise
that broke the dreary clouds
in my Ohio skies.
In time I'll know what to say, in time I'll
be all right again, once it sets in this is real.
I know you have to do what you have to do,
but I have to feel what I can't help but feel.
7/29/04
I don't know what to think about this,
I don't know what to do.
I'm not angry at you, I just fucking
hate everything right now
but I know you've got to do
what you've got to do,
and I've just got to bear it,
got to accept it,
because it doesn't make
a difference anyway,
and to think that you'd come
back for me, abandon your family,
it's just greedy.
It's just tat I finally want someone
so bad, and this has got to happen
-- do even you know how
rare you are to me? --
but deep down, even closer,
I know I knew it all along, I knew
something would happen all along.
you couldn't spit it out at first,
beating around the bush, but I
felt what you were thinking:
it hit me so hard I was mutilated by
the shockwave a week ago,
a week before you said a word of it
I felt it brewing in your head
and it makes me choke,
it drives me mad,
I don't want to be alone
and I can't bear to consider
another right now: I've got my
sights set on you so strong
Do even you know how
rare you are to me?
It's being without you that
kills, not just being lonely.
And I'm sick of being sad and hopeless,
of being so broken and homeless,
and if home is here the heart is,
it's in a desert that seems to be
a million light years away from me:
the desert that swallowed
you like a black hole:
the desert that killed me.
Love was sustinence,
now it laves me thirsty
and baking in the moonlight...
and I know I said I'd talk to you tonight,
but I just can't, all right?
I don't know what to think or say about this,
there's nothing I can do:
I know you've got to do
what you've got to do,
and I've just got to bear it,
got to accept it,
because it doesn't make
a difference anyway.
I'll just sit here tonight,
curse the desert that killed me
by stealing the Califonia sunrise
that broke the dreary clouds
in my Ohio skies.
In time I'll know what to say, in time I'll
be all right again, once it sets in this is real.
I know you have to do what you have to do,
but I have to feel what I can't help but feel.
