the ache

[ice-9]

i've seen pictures of vibrant blue sky
of whispy clouds
and a blanket ray of sun
i remember the enless dance-
the endless crash
of waves upon the rock and sand
the seagulls call my name...
and my heart aches in vain
so much that i can cry
for the only paradise
is in my own
and it's withering
with every lie.

 

[spinkle]

that's tight ice, intricately written. Nicely done :D

 

[Dagny]

That word has been coming up a lot in my thoughts lately - paradise - but I think you've put it in a way more eloquent than my thoughts could ever be. Wonderful, thank you.

 

[raverchik]

yeah nice work icey mwuah!

 

[punch e punch]

excellent

 

[cherub]

Love it ,,,, very visual and just amazing

 

[alykitty]

the seagulls call my name...
and my heart aches in vain
I hear them call my name too, sometimes!
Your words here remind me of a place not too far away!
[ 13 March 2003: Message edited by: alykitty ]

 

[titania]

That was beautiful!
xxx

 

[Cosmic Mist]

Liking it a lot. Nice stuff!

 

[L O V E L I F E]

Awesome.