🌟🌟 Social 🌟🌟 The 2025 Recovery & Social Thread

[deficiT]

for sandwich. I think they are soy-based, and there is green pepper in it. It has kind of a more sour taste that goes along well with eggplant-based spread.

Ahhh interesting

 

[Pissed_and_messed]

yeah seitan is the wheat protein thing, this slice has also soy and then the glutein, but good compound anyway. ofc not for every gut.

seitan tastes very murky, good stuff.

 

[awkward__silence]

seitan tastes very murky

may I use this as my signature

 

[chippermonk]

Good luck @Pissed_and_messed ! Don't forget to use those beautiful Finnish forests as part of your healing process. I know you love nature. You'll get there!

 

[Pissed_and_messed]

may I use this as my signature

well, it is true, so go ahead

 

[Jnowhere]

I pray for your ability to get past that compulsion it can be very difficult, but it is also very possible, and you'd be surprised how much better your life can get when dropping alcohol from the diet.

You might think you're insane, but for me, alcohol was a big reason for why I was insane.

I was a real fucking mess on booze, so I know what you mean.

 

[awkward__silence]

I was a real fucking mess on booze, so I know what you mean.

i am not sure. a mess is what is a mess spilling things when drinking i have done that too.

 

[tokayeahok]

hey guys! hope all is well. just checking in

 

[kiely]

Am still working on trying ever so much to be healthy. And staying that way !

 

[lightblue543]

>
Still waking up feeling anxious, due to the booze and those two pills of xans over a month ago those are long gone from my system, and the rebound lasted a few days then it can mildly last for a 2 weeks to a month but not longer than that. Well its been ages since then over a month and a bit but I still can't get the neurotic idea out of me mind that it's 'fried' my brain. just don't look well...

Been drinking wine again early on in the day, find once I start I can't stop but if I change my frame of mind and not overthink my role and the whole rehab thing its a bit easier.
when Im half cut without meaning to(?) when I go out with a freind over town, so I end up getting too drunk.

The advice was always to try to stop drinking as they work on similar receptor sites, and I think or feel it broke the camels back the xans. It has this weird timeline... well I haven't been too bad these days but still have the compulsion to go out and buy more drink from the offy or my local. Just don't feel well so I go on the drink again to feel a bit better and I know how that goes. It's like if you consume a substance for a while, well some of them, and then you ok but throw something else into the mix its just...

I also feel like, could be mild anxiety I am at risk of just passing away grimly, although I was told by my doctors I am ok physically. Others wanna take a long break a month, aye, maybe 6 months for full recovery.
mainly when intoxicated with high doses of ethanol and/or wd. I guess its just that then, anyone here every had that? thinking you gonna pass away .

Hate all this self-anxious worrying , found positivity and support from this forum and others

 

[kiely]

>>Hate all this self-anxious worrying , found positivity and support from this forum and others

That's intense. You sound strong.

 

[Jnowhere]

>
Still waking up feeling anxious, due to the booze and those two pills of xans over a month ago those are long gone from my system, and the rebound lasted a few days then it can mildly last for a 2 weeks to a month but not longer than that. Well its been ages since then over a month and a bit but I still can't get the neurotic idea out of me mind that it's 'fried' my brain. just don't look well...

Been drinking wine again early on in the day, find once I start I can't stop but if I change my frame of mind and not overthink my role and the whole rehab thing its a bit easier.
when Im half cut without meaning to(?) when I go out with a freind over town, so I end up getting too drunk.

The advice was always to try to stop drinking as they work on similar receptor sites, and I think or feel it broke the camels back the xans. It has this weird timeline... well I haven't been too bad these days but still have the compulsion to go out and buy more drink from the offy or my local. Just don't feel well so I go on the drink again to feel a bit better and I know how that goes. It's like if you consume a substance for a while, well some of them, and then you ok but throw something else into the mix its just...

I also feel like, could be mild anxiety I am at risk of just passing away grimly, although I was told by my doctors I am ok physically. Others wanna take a long break a month, aye, maybe 6 months for full recovery.
mainly when intoxicated with high doses of ethanol and/or wd. I guess its just that then, anyone here every had that? thinking you gonna pass away .

Hate all this self-anxious worrying , found positivity and support from this forum and others

Yeah, sort of. I can't drink anymore( allergic) and am supposed to be long dead.( chirosis of the liver, many years ago)
Yeah it sucks, but thinking about death is depressing and doesn't help.

 

[Dreamflyer]

My inspirational message of the day...

I was feeling a bit bummed out about being in my 50's, so I found an old photo from about 15 years ago to see how much I've actually aged. (Keep in mind, this was taken during the worst of my addiction.)

Can you believe that I actually looked about ten years OLDER than I do now? I was hunched forward, my ribs were showing, I had raccoon eyes and my skin was a lovely shade of greenish gray!

Healthy living is the best "beauty hack" I know of, and I don't even do it for that reason. But hey, it's a lot cheaper and safer than all those cosmetic procedures that the celebrities are getting. (And I think they look freaky anyway!)

Stay young at heart!!!
Dreamflyer

 

[nepalnt21]

been un- sober for... almost twenty years straight. everything and anything i could get.

latest phase was brugmansia (bad bad no no bad) and kratom all day every day for a year or two.

bout a month ago, i stopped taking brugmansia flat out, maybe i did a SLIGHT taper to avoid the rebound anxiety, i forget cause right about that time i started smoking weed again like i was trying to break records.

the kratom was harder, i couldn't go for more than 24 hours w/o it before the tug would be too much.

so i tapered, worked with my therapist that gave me pointers on working out my brain muskles (delaying the taking of it, etc.), and haven't had any kratom since saturday afternoon, so 3 full days later today.

the hardest day is the first or second full day, always feels like i have no stamina or drive or anything. i'm through that and feel pretty awesome.

i also rarely have caffeine anymore, rarely alkyhol, and OH THAT REMINDS ME! GOTTA GO PACK THE BONG!!!

 

[sadmachine]

Hi all.

For the past 18 months I have used oxycodone on and off when I can afford it (we're talking 4 digits a box). When I get a box (20 x 20mg IR capsule) I'd take them everyday until they ran out, then I would wait and save up for a few weeks until I could get them again which also lowered my tolerance. I didn't get withdrawals until i'd been through this a few times, but when I started going from 30mg a day to 40mg twice a day to 60mg twice a day I would get mild-moderate withdrawals. My last stint 3 months ago the withdrawals were more severe and I broke down over who I had become and how much I had spent (easily over 10 grand).

So I turned it all around, even quit 15 years of smoking at the same time as the oxy's, went hell for leather in the gym, spent more time with the wife, and gave myself some goals to work on. Fast forward today and I'm killing it once again, got the best job of my life lined up in a few weeks, the taxman owes me and I'm in the best physical shape of my life. I had a lot of nicotine cravings but I never once had the urge to get high on the oxys.

In 2010 I took 15mg of a friends unwanted oxycodone from surgery and it blew my away. It made me feel wrapped in a warm blanket, euphoric and the all effects they sing songs about. In 2022 I had my wisdom teeth removed and my Dentist was happy to give me a few extra boxes of codeine/apap and 5mg oxy, this would be my 2nd time taking it. Well I experimented with every which way possible and it was so disappointing. I would get feint "glimpses" of euphoria and then it would just become an itchy nod and some dysphoria. I was so annoyed. I suspect maybe some trauma I experienced in 2014 through a fatal car accident with a family member rewired some things in my brain. I tried every theory of dosage, timing, food, after exercise etc and nothing. It wasn't bad but it wasn't what I remembered.

But I was determined, I got a hold of 20 x 20mg IR oxy's and went to town. No matter what I tried they were always super lacklustre (and is probably why I found it so easy to quit). They would actually give me pretty bad anxiety especially the first hour which is supposed to be the best. I would have great nods and itches, and it was the most effective anti-depressant/motivator ever but bugger all warmth/euphoria, you know that good stuff im talking about.

Now it's been 3 months, life is great and I've battled out of all the bullshit and Im having my first real cravings. I have 2 more weeks until I start my new job, wife is overseas for 3 weeks, savings are stable and the taxman wants to give me exactly the same amount of money as a box lol. On top of this my "plug" (not in the conventional sense) has been gradually going legit over the past few years and will no longer have access to them by around dec-jan.

I just want one more taste. You know what I mean. One last half-box/sheet so it's not enough to put me in withdrawals. I know it could potentially set me up for a failure and I aspire to be logical and reasonable but by god am I struggling to resist.

Thanks just for letting me offload, even if no one reads it.

 

[kris66]

Hi all.

For the past 18 months I have used oxycodone on and off when I can afford it (we're talking 4 digits a box). When I get a box (20 x 20mg IR capsule) I'd take them everyday until they ran out, then I would wait and save up for a few weeks until I could get them again which also lowered my tolerance. I didn't get withdrawals until i'd been through this a few times, but when I started going from 30mg a day to 40mg twice a day to 60mg twice a day I would get mild-moderate withdrawals. My last stint 3 months ago the withdrawals were more severe and I broke down over who I had become and how much I had spent (easily over 10 grand).

So I turned it all around, even quit 15 years of smoking at the same time as the oxy's, went hell for leather in the gym, spent more time with the wife, and gave myself some goals to work on. Fast forward today and I'm killing it once again, got the best job of my life lined up in a few weeks, the taxman owes me and I'm in the best physical shape of my life. I had a lot of nicotine cravings but I never once had the urge to get high on the oxys.

In 2010 I took 15mg of a friends unwanted oxycodone from surgery and it blew my away. It made me feel wrapped in a warm blanket, euphoric and the all effects they sing songs about. In 2022 I had my wisdom teeth removed and my Dentist was happy to give me a few extra boxes of codeine/apap and 5mg oxy, this would be my 2nd time taking it. Well I experimented with every which way possible and it was so disappointing. I would get feint "glimpses" of euphoria and then it would just become an itchy nod and some dysphoria. I was so annoyed. I suspect maybe some trauma I experienced in 2014 through a fatal car accident with a family member rewired some things in my brain. I tried every theory of dosage, timing, food, after exercise etc and nothing. It wasn't bad but it wasn't what I remembered.

But I was determined, I got a hold of 20 x 20mg IR oxy's and went to town. No matter what I tried they were always super lacklustre (and is probably why I found it so easy to quit). They would actually give me pretty bad anxiety especially the first hour which is supposed to be the best. I would have great nods and itches, and it was the most effective anti-depressant/motivator ever but bugger all warmth/euphoria, you know that good stuff im talking about.

Now it's been 3 months, life is great and I've battled out of all the bullshit and Im having my first real cravings. I have 2 more weeks until I start my new job, wife is overseas for 3 weeks, savings are stable and the taxman wants to give me exactly the same amount of money as a box lol. On top of this my "plug" (not in the conventional sense) has been gradually going legit over the past few years and will no longer have access to them by around dec-jan.

I just want one more taste. You know what I mean. One last half-box/sheet so it's not enough to put me in withdrawals. I know it could potentially set me up for a failure and I aspire to be logical and reasonable but by god am I struggling to resist.

Thanks just for letting me offload, even if no one reads it.

Congratulations on quitting and getting your life together! That is awesome and not easy to do, as you know.

I hope you are able to resist. I just think you will regret it later if you don't. Honestly I know if I had access to hydrocodone again I would take it. There are just days I want it so badly . . . I guess it's a good thing I don't have access even though I have legitimate pain sometimes.

Good luck with this and with your new job!

 

[Jnowhere]

I am on oxycodone( prescribed and I kept my tolerance down for years, now only some pain relief.

The price you pay, I would stop. I am prescribed so they are cheap, and I explained my issues with my pharmacist and stopped morphine that I was also on. He is finally nice to me. lol

That antidepressant side effect lasted me years at 30mg then 40mg even with pain.

It would save your money. Once that uplifting, happy and warm feeling is gone, it is not likely to come back the way it first did.

I know I still take it for pain, which has lessoned and fear withdrawal but trust me there comes a point( at least for me, that huge doses are dangerous and will not get the desired effects.)

I have been good, but sometimes alot of pain and extras, eh why not. Opps, wasted a bunch, and on an empty stomach and nothing, but some pain relief.)

 

[kiely]

I'm stabe. It's always good to have a stable.

There's a chill in the air. Like a really bad one.

But that being said it is going to be past 90 Dg's today. The heat wave lurking in again.
. . . and it's making me nauseous.

And so is everything. But am I kicking it for ten minutes at a time today.
So I am doing better. I better find something to do.

I keep figuring out ways not to be depressed. It's exerting but I am able. I live in a Lake.

And try to do the best that I can. I snap a lot and just try to feel better these days.

Isn't that all we can do ?!

 

[thatmf]

I'm stabe. It's always good to have a stable.

There's a chill in the air. Like a really bad one.

But that being said it is going to be past 90 Dg's today. The heat wave lurking in again.
. . . and it's making me nauseous.

And so is everything. But am I kicking it for ten minutes at a time today.
So I am doing better. I better find something to do.

I keep figuring out ways not to be depressed. It's exerting but I am able. I live in a Lake.

And try to do the best that I can. I snap a lot and just try to feel better these days.

Isn't that all we can do ?!

I snapped today after watching the new Joker movie...didn't eat all day and when I got home I was in the biggest shitty.

I think art/painting etc can be a good thing (not for me, I suck at anything visual). Gardening can be good in small doses.

I'm going to set up my keyboard this week. Got a nice stand and a stool coming. I don't think I'll get back into music production for a while, too many bad memories. But it's good to have an outlet

Ouch. Our spring has sprung, will be close to 90 this week. Global warming eh ?

 

[thatmf]

Fingers crossed I didn't catch anything from the coughing and sneezing lady who decided to sit directly behind me