Thank you.
Thank you for blocking my path as i tried to leave your house this morning,
Because even though the weaker part of me would eventually come back,
The part of me that has been slowly falling apart, wouldn't have this time.
It was tough to look into your blue eyes and say everything that i said
Especially through the tear-cloud that i did a poor job of suppressing,
But i think i clearly heard the sound of your heart shatter on the tile
When i told you that I had been naive to think me and you were real --
And the shattering happened right around the utterance of the word "HOPEFUL."
Even though i was pushing you away as you pulled me into you,
There was that goddamn security and safety of your white t-shirt,
With its calming detergent scent that i cant fall asleep without,
And it was impossible for me to push away your figure,
Which stood there perfectly in front of me,
And though your words never speak of your feelings,
There was a begging in your embrace that i couldn't miss,
And i dont know if the tears that stained your shirt in that moment where tears of real sadness, or of relief.
Its not often that i get to see the side of you
That you keep perfectly locked away from the rest of the world,
But i didn't even have to look at you to know i was seeing him this morning,
And even though i was trying to kill love, i couldn't have loved you more at that moment.
You might never hear me say those words again,
But just like i felt 1000 unspoken emotions as i collapsed into your arms,
I know you hear them every time i look at you.
My eyes couldn't possibly scream them any louder.
When you carried me away from the door that i was about to leave, changed,
And wrapped my legs around you as you sat me on your lap and forced me to look into your eyes,
Everything melted away.
I had waited an eternity to have you kiss me like that...
And there was so much in me just then that i could taste salty tears as we kissed,
And i could feel myself shaking
As you pulled off my shirt
And touched my bare back
As if it were the first time we'd ever gotten this close.
I was trembling in your arms the whole time....
And connecting with you was so much more than i can articulate.
I doubted you when it was easier to do so than to just believe what my heart says...
My heart has never been wrong,
Even when my mind has been.
I might have been naive, and careless, and too trusting,
And i might have gotten hurt by it,
But my heart was always right when it said not to give up on someone.
My life was changed this morning,
In ways i'll never tell you about
But all the things that had been killing me inside,
Are now glowing endlessly within me
And my confidence that things will work out in time
Is stronger than ever.
You dont know what you want out of life any more than i do...
But i wrong...
You do need someone.
Maybe in time i will find out that its me...
Or perhaps not.
But you are just as fragile on the inside,
Even though the outside is rock-solid.
And i will remember that next time i think about throwing away something good...
Not everyone loves in words...
Someone people live their whole lives and never say it out loud.
But there's something so much more to be desired,
And this whole time, i just missed it.
Thank you, for today.
Thank you for blocking my path as i tried to leave your house this morning,
Because even though the weaker part of me would eventually come back,
The part of me that has been slowly falling apart, wouldn't have this time.
It was tough to look into your blue eyes and say everything that i said
Especially through the tear-cloud that i did a poor job of suppressing,
But i think i clearly heard the sound of your heart shatter on the tile
When i told you that I had been naive to think me and you were real --
And the shattering happened right around the utterance of the word "HOPEFUL."
Even though i was pushing you away as you pulled me into you,
There was that goddamn security and safety of your white t-shirt,
With its calming detergent scent that i cant fall asleep without,
And it was impossible for me to push away your figure,
Which stood there perfectly in front of me,
And though your words never speak of your feelings,
There was a begging in your embrace that i couldn't miss,
And i dont know if the tears that stained your shirt in that moment where tears of real sadness, or of relief.
Its not often that i get to see the side of you
That you keep perfectly locked away from the rest of the world,
But i didn't even have to look at you to know i was seeing him this morning,
And even though i was trying to kill love, i couldn't have loved you more at that moment.
You might never hear me say those words again,
But just like i felt 1000 unspoken emotions as i collapsed into your arms,
I know you hear them every time i look at you.
My eyes couldn't possibly scream them any louder.
When you carried me away from the door that i was about to leave, changed,
And wrapped my legs around you as you sat me on your lap and forced me to look into your eyes,
Everything melted away.
I had waited an eternity to have you kiss me like that...
And there was so much in me just then that i could taste salty tears as we kissed,
And i could feel myself shaking
As you pulled off my shirt
And touched my bare back
As if it were the first time we'd ever gotten this close.
I was trembling in your arms the whole time....
And connecting with you was so much more than i can articulate.
I doubted you when it was easier to do so than to just believe what my heart says...
My heart has never been wrong,
Even when my mind has been.
I might have been naive, and careless, and too trusting,
And i might have gotten hurt by it,
But my heart was always right when it said not to give up on someone.
My life was changed this morning,
In ways i'll never tell you about
But all the things that had been killing me inside,
Are now glowing endlessly within me
And my confidence that things will work out in time
Is stronger than ever.
You dont know what you want out of life any more than i do...
But i wrong...
You do need someone.
Maybe in time i will find out that its me...
Or perhaps not.
But you are just as fragile on the inside,
Even though the outside is rock-solid.
And i will remember that next time i think about throwing away something good...
Not everyone loves in words...
Someone people live their whole lives and never say it out loud.
But there's something so much more to be desired,
And this whole time, i just missed it.
Thank you, for today.
