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Tell me your tales of successful occasional opiate use

ConeyIslandBaby

ConeyIslandBaby

Ex-Bluelighter
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Oct 2, 2022
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Any successful chippers out there? Tell me your tales of being able to successfully being able to use opiates occasionally and not form a regular every day habit.
 
This might belong in DC.

In the past, yes. I began taking painkillers for a spinal injury. Was given morphine. In a year's time, I had become addicted. It was my reason to be. The withdrawal was terrible. Intermittent use for the next ten years. Only stopped because I got into cannabis. If opioids were there for me every day for much longer, then I would have been a hardcore addict for sure. Never tried Heroin, thankfully.

Addiction to cannabis was no walk in the park though. Same for ketamine, which could have taken my bladder. Caffeine I can manage :)
 
ConeyIslandBaby said:
Any successful chippers out there? Tell me your tales of being able to successfully being able to use opiates occasionally and not form a regular every day habit.
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I've never become addicted, even when I'd snort a bunch of M30's every day for a month or two, that was over ten years ago, but everybody else would be sick when we ran out for the month (huge bottles from Florida when you could go there and get filled for like 1,000 30's at a time)

I posted this here before, but I think I'm in the very rare group of people that don't get addicted to opioids. As said above, I've abused 30's and 80's for months at a time, and I've been in some bad accidents that took months to heal, and never had a problem stopping

As to you asking about occasionally using and not every day, I have a bottle of Oxy 5's I got this spring and still have about 40 left, with no urge to take them. I do take one or two sometimes tho just for a buzz, but I don't want to build a tolerance again. So to not gain an addiction I'd recommend just using once every two weeks or so recreationally and you shouldn't have any issues if you stick that, unless you're in the opposite group as me, and get addicted after a single time.
 
I take pain medication a little bit more often now because of pain and stiffness and agony. Anyway I never overindulge because i need them too much so i have to keep them on hand or available as possible. It will hurt more to overindulge. So i never do it. Medication is very strong however. If you do take too much it is just wasting a lot. That's why it is called getting wasted. 🤪

But if you are worried always do cut back !!
 
I had a good ten year run or so with no ods, stints in jail or serious financial problems. And I dove pretty much right into the deep end, I started off with bth and never really went through a preliminary stage involving Rx opioids

I got tired of that kind of lifestyle, either actively involving myself in the subculture in order to access the drugs (like how it was back home) or the kind of casual access that you can do in open air situations (which comes with its own hazards, compared to how the drug trade works in many parts of suburbia or rural America). I became more interested in personal relationships which I had neglected over the course of my use (my favorite activity while high was literally just to stay at home and nod in a haze of narcotics and cannabis) and the improvement of my professional/intellectual life, which I had also neglected to some extent.

I never experienced any kind of "rock bottom" moment or anything like that, just became interested in other stuff and didn't feel the urge to find and consume that kinda stuff anymore. I still use kratom on occasion but that's about it

Electrum1 said:
I posted this here before, but I think I'm in the very rare group of people that don't get addicted to opioids. As said above, I've abused 30's and 80's for months at a time, and I've been in some bad accidents that took months to heal, and never had a problem stopping
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I think most opioid users don't become addicted to them.
 
I was, for a fair amount of time, hopelessly addicted to opioids, once even developing a full-blown IV fentanyl habit ontop of my 380mg/day methadone maintenance consumption.

I've long wrestled my way out of that conundrum and have a few run-ins since then of varying degrees, but never a fraction as bad as where I was once.

"Chipping" for me is difficult, yet it I always do it to some degree. But I have never gotten good at it. For instance, recently I hadn't taken any opioids since September of this year (after I ran out of the poppies I grew), but not long ago I ordered a measly 500mg of O-DSMT, which for me is enough for only 3 moderate doses, or 2 strong doses (and if I wanted to, I could polish it all off through the course of a day). When I ordered it I told myself it was mainly for Christmas day, since I have to go to my girlfriend's family's house that day and I figured I would anesthetize myself to make it more pleasant (I've done this a few times before going over there, arriving with my eyes half open, pinned pupils, scratching my face etc 🤣).

But the thing is, ever since I got the o-desmethyltramadol I've been finding random excuses to take it prematurely, and I'm not so sure it will make it till Christmas. Hell, even earlier today, I was thinking about taking some this evening before taking my girlfriend to get a Christmas tree with my excuse being, "it's going to be cold out and the O-DSMT will warm me up" 🤣.

So yeah chipping is hard. Additionally, even though I am mostly able to avoid developing a habit, even occasional use has a price tag. Given my extensive history of seriously fucking with my endogenous opioid system, a day or two of opioid use will leave me feel vaguely depressed for a while after, with reduced appetite and disrupted sleep.
 
negrogesic said:
I was, for a fair amount of time, hopelessly addicted to opioids, once even developing a full-blown IV fentanyl habit ontop of my 380mg/day methadone maintenance consumption.

I've long wrestled my way out of that conundrum and have a few run-ins since then of varying degrees, but never a fraction as bad as where I was once.

"Chipping" for me is difficult, yet it I always do it to some degree. But I have never gotten good at it. For instance, recently I hadn't taken any opioids since September of this year (after I ran out of the poppies I grew), but not long ago I ordered a measly 500mg of O-DSMT, which for me is enough for only 3 moderate doses, or 2 strong doses (and if I wanted to, I could polish it all off through the course of a day). When I ordered it I told myself it was mainly for Christmas day, since I have to go to my girlfriend's family's house that day and I figured I would anesthetize myself to make it more pleasant (I've done this a few times before going over there, arriving with my eyes half open, pinned pupils, scratching my face etc 🤣).

But the thing is, ever since I got the o-desmethyltramadol I've been finding random excuses to take it prematurely, and I'm not so sure it will make it till Christmas. Hell, even earlier today, I was thinking about taking some this evening before taking my girlfriend to get a Christmas tree with my excuse being, "it's going to be cold out and the O-DSMT will warm me up" 🤣.

So yeah chipping is hard. Additionally, even though I am mostly able to avoid developing a habit, even occasional use has a price tag. Given my extensive history of seriously fucking with my endogenous opioid system, a day or two of opioid use will leave me feel vaguely depressed for a while after, with reduced appetite and disrupted sleep.
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We sound like we have similar pasts, though I never went on methadone because I was pretty sure I would use on top of it and probably overdose. Do you like tramadol? I never found it to be much fun. Lol to 'cold outside, need warming up!"

It seems to be a mixed bag of 'your mileage may vary'. I've held off for 48 hours or so, with a decent amount of oxy (purchased from a pain patient, straight out the bottle) just waiting to be used up. The idea of having something I want - like oxy - available and not going on a run is somewhat alien to me. Psychologically it has been a not particularly pleasant two days. I think after I use this up, Ill take a few weeks off entirely (I feel panicked and resentful just writing that), and then back onto every 48 hours. I am not unwell or a pain patient. I am a junkie who was clean for quite a while...and just happened upon some oxy. This is so interesting. I can't believe there are people out there who do opiates and don't get addicted. That is definitely not me - I fucking LOVE the stuff. I have been round and round on this merrygoround for a long time but with long breaks of being clean.
 
ConeyIslandBaby said:
We sound like we have similar pasts, though I never went on methadone because I was pretty sure I would use on top of it and probably overdose. Do you like tramadol? I never found it to be much fun. Lol to 'cold outside, need warming up!"
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Not a big tramadol fan, but o-desmethyltramadol is alot better than tramadol, stronger and more sedating, more potent too (around half the potency of morphine). I'm not especially crazy about o-desmethyltramadol either (although it is actually is quite good when IV'd, but I don't do that anymore). I only really get because its sold in such small quantities and is a fairly low potency opioid as whole, thus limiting the number of doses I have access to.
 
Well, as for my story, I kinda went full circle. I started using H for the first time at age 17 because I'd been wanting to try it for awhile. I already knew I had a taste for opiates (codies & morphine). And I turned out to be one of those walking damn clichés who takes one hit and instantly thinks it's the best shit on the planet. I didn't get in trouble with it despite that ; I kept as a thing for weekends or special occasions.

However then my life went down the toilet (for reasons entirely unrelated to drugs) and THAT'S where the trouble started. It's unfortunately not quite such a leap to go from 'hey this stuff makes me feel extra good when I'm already pretty happy' to 'well now that I feel crap 24/7 I reckon it'll at least make me ok-ish'....
So I started relying on it to cope with my situation and of course in no time at all I was using daily, and my tolerance shot through the roof, and there I was a few months later with a full-blown habit. I was your stereotypical junkie boy for the better part of somewhere in between 5 and 6 years. Even ended up living in a doss house for some time which was.... an experience. XD

And then, well, it got to the point where I wasn't even 'feeling it' anymore most of the time. I was tired of the lifestyle, of waking up already half-sick, of being so strung out on it, of not having the time and energy for anything else besides. I had also by then racked up a stupid number of ODs. (All Hail, St Narcan!) It's hard to put into words ; there wasn't any one dramatic incident or anything that made me change my course.

... I literally just sat up in bed one morning and said to myself, 'this just kind of defeats the fucking point now'.
From there on I started a slow and painful learning process of teaching myself how to cope with the bad shit that life throws at all of us without constantly dragging my chemical comfort blanket along behind. As well as the more joyful and exciting process of re-discovering some interests I'd left by the wayside - such as my main passion, photography, which is now a job.

What remained however was the honest admission that I just bloody love the stuff. Methadone wasn't for me. Total abstinence isn't for me, either. The second I tell myself I can never touch ANY at all, ever, I start obsessing again. But knowing that I can go get some if I want some then I'm chill, and I've never felt like going back. If you wanted me to use multiple times a day like I was you'd have to tie my down and forcibly inject me. I no longer WANT to. I find much prefer not having to worry about withdrawal, and actually getting a proper bang for my buck again. And I think PREFER is really the salient point. It takes no effort or discipline whatsoever to do thing A if you prefer it over thing B.
That's what I answer when someone asks me 'but how do you DO it?!' like I'm some impossible outlier creature.

... Anyways, that's me. 🤷‍♂️
 
Well…. I am sitting here high as mofo hell and listening to Jordan Peterson on YouTube

If you know how amazing articulate, empathetic and intelligent this man is you will know what I mean. I’m Sapio sexual so I love shit like this. I am like that song you listen to that’s just profound to your experience. It’s not just a simple melody or attractive because of its sound. It’s actually a emotional journey. No this isn’t happiness. It might even be painful at first. It has to in order to go so deep. Happiness would be like elevator music. It’s harmless but can be tricky. It’s sweet but simple. It lacks depth because it’s shallow. That’s just not me. I might be exhausting but that’s because it’s what makes us all grow. Growth can only happen if we become uncomfortable first. You don’t know how strong you are until it’s your only option. As humans we are built to be walking uphill. God knows what He doing. Might be good if we really listened to Him.
 
Kellsee said:
Well…. I am sitting here high as mofo hell and listening to Jordan Peterson on YouTube

If you know how amazing articulate, empathetic and intelligent this man is you will know what I mean. I’m Sapio sexual so I love shit like this. I am like that song you listen to that’s just profound to your experience. It’s not just a simple melody or attractive because of its sound. It’s actually a emotional journey. No this isn’t happiness. It might even be painful at first. It has to in order to go so deep. Happiness would be like elevator music. It’s harmless but can be tricky. It’s sweet but simple. It lacks depth because it’s shallow. That’s just not me. I might be exhausting but that’s because it’s what makes us all grow. Growth can only happen if we become uncomfortable first. You don’t know how strong you are until it’s your only option. As humans we are built to be walking uphill. God knows what He doing. Might be good if we really listened to Him.
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Sorry...Im really quite high and distracted. x HUG
 
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