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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

TDS Social thread vs. 2012.1

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spork said:
^ :( <3 Just try to get through it, tomorrow is a new day.

I'm trying to get the motivation to work out before I have to go to work today, but it's proving to be really hard.
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I don't know if I can right now. She did it because she found out I stole my car to go see a girl that I liked and she found out that I had sold some vicodin I had gotten for free because I didn't want to take any. I guess no matter how much I try everyday to be the best person I can, I always fall short one way and it affects me. I guess I kind of ruined my summer but I fucking deserve it anyway. The bad things I do will catch up to me in the end no matter how much good I do, because in today's world nobody cares what good you do, so I need to just focus on not doing bad.
 
Whats up everyone? Fuck I cant find my friend, its usually pretty easy to keep track of them coz I pretty much only have 2 friends and one of them lives with me. My friends flatmate txt me asking bout him coz he hasnt been able to contact him in 2 days either, I worried now. :-S
 
Oh no!
Hopefully he is okay.
Sometimes i take off out of the house and don't come back for 2 - 5 days without warning people.
 
badfish45 said:
I don't know if I can right now. She did it because she found out I stole my car to go see a girl that I liked and she found out that I had sold some vicodin I had gotten for free because I didn't want to take any. I guess no matter how much I try everyday to be the best person I can, I always fall short one way and it affects me. I guess I kind of ruined my summer but I fucking deserve it anyway. The bad things I do will catch up to me in the end no matter how much good I do, because in today's world nobody cares what good you do, so I need to just focus on not doing bad.
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Stop being so hard on yourself, you ARE a good person. You make mistakes, you're human but this stuff isn't going to matter real soon. Even if you're stuck at home over the summer, it's only a few months and won't matter in the grand scheme of things. Be good to you, because you DO deserve it. <3
 
motherofearth said:
Just keeping it real. Not killing myself anymore and loving people again :)
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I love it :).

And B, you don't want to have you parents find out about you selling or using drugs. It might not seem like it can happen but it can and once they find out you will never be able to reverse it and they will think and look at you differently from that point on. It happened to me and things have been different ever since that day. Stay away from the opiates. Don't even be possessing them, even if your intention was to sell them if you got them for free. One day you might be apt to just throw one in your mouth to see what all the fuss is about. Don't even put yourself in that position. <3 I hope I don't sound like I'm preaching but I know how it goes.
 
Ya, stick with a good psychedelic once every few months, and maybe the occasional joint. Opiates are all bad after the first few highs. We, as BLers, don't like it when society pulls a "all drugs are bad" attitude, but we have to be careful not to be pulling a "all drugs aren't bad" attitude of our own. Just because we condone the right to use drugs and probably want them legal does not mean that we need to go around gobbling each one up that we can. The reality is that some drugs are not as bad as the hype (weed), as bad as the hype (opiates) or worse than the hype (alcohol). It's perfectly fine to be one of us and at the same time be completely honest with the fact that opiates can and will destroy your life. They do this quicker when they're illegal, but it's going to happen regardless*.

*Sure, one in twenty can pull it off responsibly in the long run, but you all know what I mean.
 
just once it'd be nice if i could wake up and not have my first thought be about walking down to the highway and jumping in front of a truck

the anniversary of my best friends death was last week. usually i'm not the most stable person, but i've been seriously such a fucking wreck since then.

and i've started taking it out on the other people in my life

seriously sometimes i think the world would be a better place without me around

blehhhhhhhhhhhhhh
 
^I guarantee you'd be missed if you weren't around, tnw. I've always enjoyed reading your posts across the board. I know how anniversaries of deaths can be, but I think know you can get through this. Have you talked to a counselor or therapist about these feelings? Another thing that helps me when I'm feeling that way is to just write about how I'm feeling. Putting feelings to words can be very therapeutic. Even if you don't want to do it or don't feel like you have the energy to, you should try. If you need a friend or even just a sounding board, feel free to PM me anytime. <3
 
thanks spork

i went to counseling once upon a time, but all the counselor and i talked about really was how much my life sucked and how his daughter was terminally ill.

i quit seeing him then she died like a few weeks later i found out. :/ rip abby, hope you're doing okay john

i should maybe start going to see him again idk though because at the time it seriously just felt like it made things worse
 
^Is there someone else you can see besides him, maybe? I know for me and a lot of other people it sometimes takes a lot of tries to get a counselor or therapist that is a good match. Though with that situation, it seems like the counselor had a lot going on himself and you might find him more beneficial now.
 
spork said:
Stop being so hard on yourself, you ARE a good person. You make mistakes, you're human but this stuff isn't going to matter real soon. Even if you're stuck at home over the summer, it's only a few months and won't matter in the grand scheme of things. Be good to you, because you DO deserve it. <3
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Thanks so much spork :) means a lot. Yesterday was a bit more difficult but you know I got through it and today's a new day to face.
 
TNW <3 I respect you a lot. I love your personality across the board and I like that you pop your head in TDS from time to time. I'm so sorry it's a tough time for you right now :-\. Anniversaries are really rough. <3 sending lots of love your way.

I am going to a concert tonight to see Explosions in the Sky. :-D Very excited!!
 
^soooooooo jelly!! You're gonna have an amazing time though! :)

badfish45 said:
Thanks so much spork :) means a lot. Yesterday was a bit more difficult but you know I got through it and today's a new day to face.
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So glad to hear you're doing better today! :)

It's effin' hot outside here. I was out and about earlier and just drenched in sweat from just sitting outside and waiting for the bus. I had every intention of going to the pool as soon as I got home but now I just wanna stay here in the A/C for a while.
 
whoooo s.h. i saw explosions in 2008. it was so good. my friend who was with me was freakin out saying "omg i feel like i'm watching the modern version of beehtoven, this is so amazing." i wasn't quite where he was mentally (i had to drive =p) but i had to agree lol. :) it was amazing. you're gonna love it.

& thanks for the <3's. feeling a lot better right now. first thing in the morning is always the worst time for me emotionally...
 
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