Taxi Cab Confessions

[Strawberry_lovemuffin]

So I know we've ALL taken taxis at one time or another.... surely you all have stories to tell.

Bad drivers?
Raunchy Rendevous?
Disturbing incidents?
Vomiting incidents?

I'll graciously admit that there ARE some taxi drivers who are great. They're the ones who get you home when you can barely slur out the name of your suburb before passing out in the backseat. But the large majority are the kind who'll drive you six times up and down Springvale road and then turn in the wrong direction knowing you don't know where the hell you're going and then charge you for all the wasted travelling time.

The worst one we've ever had was after a party at Seaford. We told him we needed to get to "Mulgrave" then pretty much zoned out in the backseat. 15 minutes later we regained conciousness and the dickhead was driving in the opposite direction. We asked him to stop, pull over and look at the Melways. "Well, where are we?" my boyfriend asked. "Well...." the taxi driver said, with furrowed brow. "We're somewhere ."

We got out and walked away without paying a cent.

What are your taxi stories?

 

[superbabydoc]

After my graduation dinner, a large group of us grabbes two taxis from the front of the Rialto, to take us back to someones home. Three of us got in the 1st cab. It quickly became clear that our driver was a little odd. He kept looking in the rear mirror (hypervigilant in psych. speak!)and was clearly agitated. He became highly suspicious and asked "why's that other cab following us?". We explained it was our friends, but he didn't seem very convinced.

His driving was erratic - he was speeding through the city, and braking at red lights at the absolute last second. He asked what we did and my friend made the mistake of telling him we were psych nurses. He told us about his friend who had been detained as an involuntary patient, and he clearly wasn't impressed with psych services.

Once we got out in the city, he was doing about 90 in the 60 zones. He was talking incessantly about various paranoid stuff. Lucky it was only a 7km drive and we emerged unscathed. I figured the guy was either psychotic and/or had taken way too many amphetamines. I called the company and told them, but I don't think they gave a toss.

 

[a_muse]

A few years ago, when I was living in Yorkshire, UK we had a Cabbie on Crack. And we were all REALLY stoned.

He was a little nervous at first, I was with my boyfriend at the time, his sister and her son, who cried the whole time, the driver was Pakistani, and he was scared the whole time that the kid was going to vomit in the back seat.
We stopped outside my boyfriends sisters council flat and I was left alone in the car, the driver then proceeded to hoover up a line of coke, his nervousness wore away and from then on he didnt shut up.
He asked me my name, where I was from, what language we spoke in Australia ("Australian?") that he looked after all his freinds, including myself and my boyfriend who eventually joined me in the cab after he helped his sister get into her flat, he then gave my bf a cigarette and he would charge us only three quid 50, about a third of the fare. MY bf, who hated non-Caucasians, to my surprise gave him a one pound 50 tip when he dropped us off at the video store.
Once we had our vid and were heading home, he pulled out of nowhere, saying that he would drive us home because we were his friends and he wanted to look after us. And he did.
Despite this guys benevolence, my ex still hates Pakistanis, at least he did last time I spoke to him.

 

[neverwas]

k...mines shared with a fellow bl'er doon...

when i was living in sydney it was a 25dollar cab drive from the nearest train station to my house...

so anyways we walked to the cab rank...no in a cab my place was bout fifteen mins by cab and we asked one cabby to take us and he let s get in the cab then falt out said...no i finish in half hr must not take u...to long journey for me...*grrr*

so after asking another guy and complaing to him that it was only fifteen mins, so by the time he took us and got back to the rank he was knocking off he let us get in...

we got in the cab tired as all fuck after two tribes 03 then sounds on sunday and i told the driver where to go...he must of been all of 20...

well i fell asleep in the cab didnt i...

he didnt know where he was going and when i woke the metere was in the 40 DOLLAR range...

we were in the middle of FUCKING no where...trees and sticks and all

so we made him pull over and after a very heated discussion...

argueing with him that he said he knew where he was oging and now he got us lost so it was hois fault not ours he turned round and drove backl...

heres the funny bit...

upon driving back and back tracking shit loads he didnt even turn his metre off or anything...

we got back to my place absolutly fucking fuming and the meter was on round the $50mark...*grrrr* still ticking over...he didnt even stop it or nothing while he looked in the melways or back tracked...

so doon had to haggel our way down to paying $25...the driver refused to admit it was his fault and said we had to pay THE FULL FARE even though we got lost...*grrr* and i was not going to pay him the exztra cash just cause he fucked up..and the amount was over $50 somewhere

so i rang the taxi company when the next day came round didnt i...i got a written letter of apology and a cab charge to where ever i needed to go the next time i needed a cab

i do give one taxi company specail credit though...the ones that operate from kings cross/syd...i use to get taxi home from the club i worked at in the cross when ever i finished late...and he use to come into my work and wait for me to finish at no charge and use to bring the cab round the front of my place and not let anyone know where i lived or nothing...for drunken saftey reasons and he use to make sure i was inside and everything before he left...this cabby was the best

 

[Cosmic Mist]

I had caugh a 151 night ride bus to deewhy and had intended to catch a cab home as there are no buses to where i live at 3am. I had a hell of a time flaggind down a taxi, but eventually found one who would stop for me, and i told him where to go, but to please go via the main roads.
He proceeded to go via the back streets, which fortunately i was more than familiar with anyway, but at the cost of a doubled fare...

He spoke perfect english and knew what i was doing. Prick.

I have however had the exact opporsite happen, where by the cabbie was so good that i tipped him (a rare thing from one with both scottish and jewish heritage)

 

[Daimo]

I went to get in a cab after Welcome 2001 - the cab driver didnt speak english..... he took off before i was actually fully in the cab and i was dragged along the ground for about 5m.... i escaped unscathed, but a few weeks later i saw on the news that someone died from the exact same thing.... being dragged along after half being in a cab when it took off..... I wondered if it was the same driver, cuz I was tired I didn't get his details

 

[papermate]

good story starfalls, im glad you got compensation. I think its important to also give GOOD feedback though. As lots of you in the service industray are aware, its a lovely feeling when someone rings your boss and said you did a good job.

Ive rang, emailed and wrote letters to compliment NRMA a couple of times, and other places ive enjoyed the service.

My worst story. I worked in a hotel in the city and cut open my hand - i was working in a bar. I had no idea where the hospital was, i had just started, only 17. Anyway, i ran to a cab with a company cabcharge, and told him to take me to the nearest hospital, and he just looked at me like i had rocks in my head. He couldnt speak english, he was driving already and the meter on.

I literally got out at the lights and jumped in another cab who was only too happy that i had a blank cab charge.

 

[Raz]

I've been lucky with taxis *touch wood* but I've heard some stories both good and bad...

One of my friends had just spent the last half hour lying in the mud vomiting because he was so drunk...a taxi driver kicked him out cause he was scared that my friend would chuck in his cab...but the next taxi driver was awesome cool...pulled over every time my friend felt like he was gonna be sick and turned the meter off until they drove off again...and even bought him a bottle of water to make sure he'd get at least a little rehydrated...

One of my other friends got into a cab where the taxi driver ran over some guy who was being an asshole...and when my friend told him to stop so he could make sure the guy was okay, the taxi driver started screaming abuse at him...crazy world....

--Raz--

 

[anna!]

I once caught a taxi home from a night at the pub in Adelaide. The driver was this very strange Scottish guy in his mid-30s. He was really friendly and talked non-stop the whole way home, which was great until he said:

"My 5 year old loves Playschool. I'd like to stick one in that [hername, can't remember it] bird."

then

"My 5 year old hates me. She says 'daddy's mean, he only let's me use one piece of paper when I do poos'. Her mum lets her use two pieces. She sits on the loo and says 'I want mummy to wipe my bottom because she uses two pieces of paper'."

So I got out. It was creepy. I don't need to know about his 5 year olds bowel movements, really.

 

[maniia]

i was in adelaide for business with my boss, and a taxi driver asked us if he could give us a $100 note in exchange for our 2 $50's. We had been working for 12 hours, so we said sure, and didn't notice til 2 days later he gave us a fake $100

 

[doon]

ahhhh starfalls i remember that cab ride it was fucking funny!!

her asleep, me not knowing my arse from my elbow in sydney direction wise, i got a bit suss when it took longer then a previous cab ride back to her house, then having having the cabby try and charge us for the fuck up

i said to him i aint paying that mate you are the one that fucked up

him saying well how bout you pay 40

i said no how bout i pay 25 thats all your getting buddy!! hehehe

oh the joy of taxis in sydney

 

[SteveElektro]

I jumped in a taxi once, the taxi driver proceed to tell me a disturbing story regarding the prostitute he had just picked up and driven to hospital. I shall refrain from telling the whole story. It was horrid.

 

[focus]

140km/hr down Toorak rd at 11pm(50km/h zone)

 

[Winterborn]

^ HAHA that would have been wild. Specially if you were paranoid form a bad trip.

 

[papermate]

any bl's taxi drivers???

 

[miss slingshot]

After my combined birthday party this year....(why am i doing this ) 8( , come 5:30am my best friend and I both suddenly decided that it was time to go home (why we thought this after the delicious pharmacuticals we had consumed we're still trying to work out) grabbed our bags and jumped into a taxi.

Leaving North Melbourne we gave the taxi driver my address before asking him to take the very scenic route through St Kilda before heading back to the collingwood area. Between us we have three memories of the trip: her undoing my stockings n suspenders and draging them down my legs with her teeth, me nibbling her nipples in wonder as she tasted like peaches and the rude shock of a camera flash (not ours). Jumping out of the taxi half naked in Richmond, we have no other memories of the cab ride and no idea how we got home from there. Leaving her wallet containing an entire pay and my birthday bottle of Moet in the taxi, theres one very happy taxi driver our there somewhere!

(over n out from drunk miss slingshot)8(

 

[hoptis]

(why we thought this after the delicious pharmacuticals we had consumed we're still trying to work out)

Obviously cause you wanted to have sex.

I've had some pretty crazy taxi drivers.

Once a friend and I caught a cab from Prince of Wales to Market and the cab driver was a complete nutter, he pulled up behind a car at red lights and started honking his horn... the car in front thinking it was green rolled through the lights. When they realised it was a red, they drove really slowly and pulled up alongside and started abusing our driver... we both sunk down really low in the back and pretended we weren't there.

Then he drove up Nepean Highway completely ignoring lane markings. Then he "pushed" another car through red lights at Punt Road and High Street which got us the finger again.

A couple weeks after that we had a cab driver who was so funny. He was wearing a tea cosy and obviously Jamaican and had Bob Marley on this cassette he was listening to real loud and was singing along. Fucking hilarious...

"COULD YOU BE LOVED.... AND BE LOVED... DON'T LET THEM FOOL YA!"

Funniest cab ride of my life.

Another night, and this is why I always tell my gay friends to be careful around cabbies, a lot of whom come from religious and cultural backgrounds that look down on homosexuality. Jumped in a cab with two really horny gay guys in the back who just couldn't help themselves.

I'm trying to maintain a civil conversation with the driver and they start going at it in the back, one's pulled the other guys cock out and then I hear the cabbie going "NO NO! NOT IN MY CAB!..."... uh we got kicked out of that one.

 

[ar_gee]

*had a mate spew in the back without the driver knowing.

*done a fair few runners back in the day. got grabbed and chased by taxi's few times

*Had them charge me more than the metre said

* Found a taxi driver on the northern beaches who didn't know where warringah mall is, another one frenchs forest.

* had driver watching me + girl in the back instead of the road

* mate of mine had a cab fare up to $70, went into maccas to get some food, told the guy he would be back, and the guy left!!! free ride!!!

*nowadays i can't get in a cab w/out having to pay before we go anywhere. i don't even look dodgy ( i think )

more to come...

 

[kryalkastleE]

the worst one was a few years ago after my year 12 formal afterparty in the city me and my formal date and my best friend and her boyfriend decided to go back to my dates house (which i thought was a VERY good idea as i really liked my date ) so we jumped in a cab...between us all being pissed/fucked and told him to go to kangaroo ground (middle of nowhere, but we were directing him)
anyway we get out to about warrandyte and he is crouching down near the windshield squinting to see....so we tell him to put his high beams on....and he has NO IDEA what high beams are...so we try to explain it and he turns everything on...hazrd lights, windscreen wipers and we all find this hilarious, until my formal date leans over and snaps them on for him...he then tries to describe "high beam etiquette" about turning them down and up when another ar passes....taxi driver man REALLY doesnt like being told what to do and tells him to "BE silent".....
after a few mins of silence my date asks him "where are you from" - meaning where in melbourne does he live...he replies "I AM FROM AFGANISTAN!!!" in a loud booming quite scary voice....so we all shut up and pray to god we get home soon....
but no this isnt the end...the car starts pulling and jerking as if it is running out of petrol, and we look over his shoulder and sure enough the tank is on empty....but we are almost there. we stop a few metres from his house and jump out...while my date tries to explain how to get back to the city from kangaroo ground.... i just tell the driver to take this road, and it will lead him back to the freeway, as i wanted him to get out of there asap, as he was REALLY scary....so he heads off along the road i told him, although i have no idea where it went....but there must have been one pissed off taxi driver left in the midddle of nowhere with no pertrol....i was worried for the rest of the night that he was gonna come back and "get us"

 

[atoning_unifex]

sorry guys only a positive story to relate......

i was in london, and a mate and i were supposed to meet his wife at a rave on a barge.....

so chems down the neck and off we go to a minicab stand..
the cab turns out to be a tiny dihatsu charade...
and the driver a 7 foot tall jamacan(sp)

we spent 2.5 hours touring london with this guy (who was so tall his red/green/yellow kintted hat was blowing in the breeze out the sunroof)
wacked out on fun.....travelling up and down the thames looking for the barge..

eventually we find the venue and he charged us 10 quid...!!!!

cheap fun and relatively safe....

we laughed about the poor buggers afro for hours...


ah the old daze....