It was a long story I posted at drugs forum (same username there if your interested). But take it from me, if you think blacking out and doing stupid stuff is a problem with alcohol, stay the hell away from benzos. I personally used benzos responsibly and in a controlled manner for a month or so, then one day I just... lost it. I for some reason decided to take more, and thats all I remember.
I woke up the next day hallucinating, confused, Id pissed myself, I was high as a fucking kite, I couldnt speak a legible sentance. It was in all a horrible event. Even worse was convincing everybody I hadnt tried to killmyself, without owning up to a drug problem. It turns out Id just gone nuts and taken every drug I had at the time (something id never even dream of doing normally, no drug has ever made me make such bad decisions before). Many people are fine with benzos, but in my experience they are terrible for doing things you regret. A good friend of mine just started doing coke again after kicking the habbit for the best part of a year. Exactly the same thing happened to him, he took etizolam, like normal, then lost control and took more, bought thousands, and thousands in coke. Had a 5 day long bender. And exited not knowing what had happened with a coke addiction and massive debt.
Also both of these instinces where caused by etizolam specifically (I know its not technically a benzo). Other benzos dont seem to suffer this to such a degree.
I just re read that, and It does not accurately convey just HOW confused I was when id woken up in hopsital like that, with no memory of why. In my stupid high state, Id taken everything I had in my stash which was, some mxe, some ket, a lot of kratom, some codeine, a fair bit of oxy and to top it all off, an extremely large amount of diphenhydramine (this was in there PURELY to help with the itching from opiates. I should probabaly be dead 8(.
Im normally a very controlled person when it comes to drugs, But benzos just creep up on you. I have spent a long time thinking about it, and on my usual dose, i just snapped, and nothing I couldve done would have brought back reason and logic to my mind. For me persoanlly there is no safe way to use benzos.