Take a look if ya want

[Sleeping_Door_Mouse]

This isnt so much for anyone to read, as much as it is to let some things go. Im having an extremely hard time in my life at the moment. It feel like things are crashing down on me, and theres nothing i can do about it. Ive been in a rut since February and I cant get out. I think im beginning to lose it...


You lie and lie and lie.
You lie to my face.
You lie to my back.
And yet,
You still call me your friend.
How?
How can you think I will excuse all your shit?
How can you think I will forget so fast?
You must think I’m a fool.
I may well be,
But I’m better than you.

Who am I trying to kid?
I’m not better than you.
I’m not even equal to you.
I’m nothing.
I’m the useless waste of the world.
I’m the person we could all do without.
So why do I bother waking up in the morning?

If I could,
I’d make it all go away.
I’d sleep for eternity,
I’d lay my head upon concrete,
I’d lay it in the pond beneath,
In the dark, red pond,
The warm red pond.
The pond makes all the problems go away,
It makes them all stop talking,
It makes them see that I’m nothing,
It makes them realize I’m not worth their time.
Above all,
It lets me sleep.
All I want,
Is to sleep.
Just to sleep,
And never wake up.
To dream that I can be happy,
That I can smile and not worry,
That for once,
I can look at myself in the mirror,
And not want a gun,
Not want to end the pain,
Not want to make it all go away.

But it doesn’t matter.
Dreams fade.
People leave.
Alone again.
Nothing left.

In respect to the truth,
That’s all I have.
I have nothing,
I have no one.
I am nothing.
I am no one.
The lies they speak don’t catch me,
I know truth from falsities.
I know that I can’t be happy,
Know that I never will be.
So I’ve stopped trying.

Why fight the war you cant win,
Even if that war is life.

 

[neverwas]

*hugs*

Why fight the war you cant win,
Even if that war is life.

hun this is a good peice. it opens up to what ur going through and i really liked what i read...you arent alon ein what ur feeling and working through either...

being stuck in a rutt is not something easily to get out of. i have been stuck in a rutt before and was stuck in one for ages up untill a few weeks ago i decided that in order to get out of the rutt i had to motivate myself and at least start to get out of it...

i moved states from new south wales to victoria to be with my friends...start a new happy life and get out of the rutt i was stuck in in syndey NSW.sometimes you are so far down in the rutt u wana stay there coz its to much nrg to get up out of it...it may seem hopeless but its not...so u sit there and it gets worse and worse...

you are never alone in things like this and i hope you find the peace you are looking for and find what it is you need to get urself out of the rutt u are stuck in...

feel free to pm me or email me if u need to talk or just want someone to vent with.

kel.

 

[TrAnCe&aCiD]

Holy shit this poem hits my current situation right on the head. Very well written and dont let them get the better of you. You do deserve better and will get better. MY ex broke up with me for alot of bulshit reasons i found out later wernt true. She kissed like 6 guys with in a month of dumping me after told me she cant have any physical contact. She now dates a 21 year old with kid. Dont let them get the best of you, cause you do deserve better and know that one day you will get better. The sooner you accept that the better things will be for you. Your peom is a master piece and fits my situation like a glove. Keep strong and if you ever need someone to talk to send me a PM