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libelula

libelula

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 21, 2000
Messages
600
Location
San Francisco
...I wrote this after a couple months of exploring my feelings towards my lover's past relationships. There was a period where I felt as though I could never compare....our experiences could never be so deep.... Just recently, while lying in bed, I was able to somehow let go of all these feelings; this was a big step for me and I wanted to share this:
standing nude on this precipice
toeing the line between the hard rock behind me
and the smooth liquid ocean before me
my soft uncovered breasts
the perfect candy coating
over my pure vulnerable heart underneath
if only i could be perpetually naked with you
that my heart and my thoughts be always so clear
if only my idle thoughts
were not so poisonous
feeding my inner critic so well
that voice that enjoys reminding me of her
and what you shared so beautifully
so far back in the past
that voice that slips me that bittersweet poison
like almonds on my lips
so easy it is to slip
into a self-fulfilling spiral of doubt
i doubt not your love, for your love is our love
but only myself
i doubt not our future, for our destiny is each other
but only that future you could never explore
i hold you in my arms
and feel our souls as one
i take your broken halves
and complete you with mine
i know it is me you want
it was me all along
standing nude on this precipice
toeing the line between the hard rock behind me
and the smooth liquid ocean before me
i leap into the blue
never looking back
accepting perpetual nakedness
reserving that murderous elixir for another
not me i cry
and
never
us
[ 31 January 2003: Message edited by: libelula ]
 
sometimes growth can be the hardest scariest thing in the world, and it requires a degree of release that some people find hard to give, just like diving off your precipice. congratulations, doesnt it feel good to be free of your fears? :)
 
absolutely. this works so well, because it is straightforward, real, and beautiful all at the same time.
i love that not only do you capture (as best as you can, of course) the profundity of what you feel, but also do it in a manner that reveals just how raw it all is.
the fact that i can relate to it helps also, i believe. :) cheers.
 
wow baby...that is so beautiful
congradulations are in order....
what we forget to acknowledge is that growth, even when it is obvious enough for us to acknowledge what it is, and that it is positive, can be bitersweet. By accepting his old life, and your place in it,you accept that you are also starting something new- and markers of change are always loaded with emotion...recognize that part of your emotional landscape now can include you mourning the loss of an old self...and death IS life.....
peace&love
 
libelula said:

standing nude on this precipice
toeing the line between the hard rock behind me
and the smooth liquid ocean before me
i leap into the blue
never looking back
accepting perpetual nakedness
reserving that murderous elixir for another
not me i cry
and
never
us
Click to expand...


I find such a sense of peace in those lines.

Enjoyed reading this.
 
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