Sweet Dreams

Day 5 off of opiates...

Waiting, waiting, waiting... had some marijuana last night. Everyone is fucking broke.

My dreams however are filled with drugs... all the drugs you could ever ask for...

A couple of nights ago I had a dream that this floating syringe shot me up with heroin and in the dream I felt the greatest rush. I also dreamed I found a bucket full of Opana... but they were all the wrong colors! Like, 40mg Opana are yellow, but in my dream they were teal, etc... it was strange. I woke up before I got into the Opana... curses.

Then yesterday I had that same dream of having a softball size rock of cocaine and heroin, 1 of each... once again I woke up before I could indulge.

Last night I had a dream I was doing cocaine in the bathroom of somewhere familiar but I couldn't quite place it. I ended up getting caught by some security guard who took my fucking coke.

If sleep can't get my mind off drugs, what will? I have a fucking tin of old heroin baggies, there must be hundreds in there... why am I saving them? Who the fuck knows.

I just want to nod the days away and sleep through the nights...

 

5 days is a great accomplishment, hun. It's not going to be easy by any means, but I KNOW you can do this.

 

Yea im on day one now and ccould only wish i had five like you... keep at it!!

 

Thank you, spork, you've always been a great source of encouragement and I truly appreciate it.

I wish you luck jones-in_J -- you KNOW it's not an easy battle.

I feel like I will relapse as soon as I possibly can though... I don't have the resolve to quit for good...