• Trip Reports Moderator: M!$ter-ED

***Substance of January and now February!!: Ibogaine

Beenhead

Beenhead

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Nov 15, 2000
Messages
3,673
Location
Deep in a Floridian Mangrove Forest
Hello friends! I hope everyone is having a happy new year! I have been a little late doing the update this month, Ive been out in the Everglades, then the Goethe State Forest doing some camping.

Since the new year is about starting over and moving on to better things, I
want every one to take a good long look at themselves. And mostly any bad habits they might have. You guys know what I am talking about, and if you are happy with your self, I am sure you can still add some fine discussion and thoughts to this thread.

Ibogaine apparently can be used as a treatment for drug addiction. I really want this to be one of the most looked at Substance of the Months. I really want any experiences with Ibogaine in any context, even recreational. Has anyone ever tried Ibogaine, known anyone who has? Do you know anything about Ibogaine? Anything about Ibogaine, lets discuss it here this month. There is not many experiences about Ibogaine on Bluelight. But possibly Xorkoth can provide us with something from Erowid if he is allowed, I dont want to go over there and make copies of reports there unless I can.

I want everyone with an alcohol or opiate problem to think about trying to give it up. Maybe Ibogaine is the answer, maybe it is not for you. Maybe treatment is. Hell, what worked for you? Did another Psychedelic drug work for you?


Here are the only two TRs I could find on Ibogaine on BL. If anyone knows of any more, please post them here so we can all learn as much as possible about this mysterious and potentially wonderful plant.

Looks like this person Joined BL only to share this with us:
http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/showthread.php?t=302968&highlight=ibogaine

A great story by BipNorris:
http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/showthread.php?t=126138&highlight=ibogaine



So lets all make this new year the best yet and think about getting healthy. Or at least confront your problem head on and decide when enough is going to be enough. Just know that you have many friends here on Bluelight. I would love to give some support, or answer questions to anyone who has them. Our forum the Darkside is a great place to seek the help ans support from well qualified people.

Thanks again, Happy New Year, and lets talk about Ibogaine!
 
Hey man, hope you had a fabulous time in the Everglades and the forest! Good idea for a substance of the month. I don't see anything wrong with linking to Erowid reports to flesh this out a bit, if you want.

Nice post, by the way... Happy New Year to you as well! My new year's resolution is precisely to get healthier, in many ways. With a push from various events (which I am slowly writing a report about), I managed to shake off all my addictions other than the lingering recurring desire to be altered, and I'm off to a good start this year drug-free, except for a little cannabis when the going gets tough.
 
Good substance to highlight beenhead, we need all the info we can get on this one. Reports on its effects are far too scarce.
 
I got some reports from Erowid I thought would be great to highlight:

Thanks to Xorkoth for the okay and to the guys and gals at Erowid for their generosity with their work.
Saved From Addiction:
http://www.erowid.org/experiences/exp.php?ID=63089

Beautiful but not Easy:
http://www.erowid.org/experiences/exp.php?ID=42703

A Trip of a Lifetime:
http://observer.guardian.co.uk/magazine/story/0,11913,1241264,00.html

To Heaven and Back:
http://www.erowid.org/experiences/exp.php?ID=41752

A Gift of Freedom:
http://www.erowid.org/experiences/exp.php?ID=1948
 
In terms of it's 3D chemical structure, it's a very weird molecule IMO. It's shape is totally unlike any of the yohimbine/other beta carboline based alkaloids. Probably accounts for it's very unusual spectrum of activity - all things to all people at differing doses. Mind you, watching the bloke in the BBC series,'Tribe' undergo the iboga ritual, it looks like it's not the most comfortable of experiences; even far outstrips the sort of purging that occurs at the beginning of an ayahuasca experience in the 'oh god...' stakes!

In terms of receptor types it acts at, I think it's even more promiscuous than LSD & acid is a pretty horny molecule - it'll get down with at least 4 totally different receptor types (serotonin, dopamine, noradrenaline & histamine). Don't know if I'd ever get around to a full experience with this; would definitely want more info on it's pharmacology before I'd put myself forward for a full on experience with it. Seems a full on trip with it is the realms of people wanting to deal with a deep seated problem & I've whittled down mine over the years to managable levels, so no longer have a need to deal with them in this manner. It's supposed to be very effective though and not just temporary either. Long term changes in behaviour, for the better, seem more likely with ibogaine than just about anything else when it comes to addiction problems.
 
I agree fully, and I seem to manage my problem fine for now, and Ill always hold Ibogaine as a wild card if I think things are really getting screwed up. Im working on lowering my daily intake of methadone right now, but I think Ill be fine.

I was looking at the 3d picture of Ibogaine yesterday, and noticed its strange conformation as well, especially in comparison to the beta carboline molecules. I hvae never really looked at a histamine molecule though sadly. I thought that somehow Iboga acted at the Mu or somehow effected the Mu system somehow? Not necessarily how 7-HydroxyMitragynine, (as a Mu agonist), but somehow. Any info there F&B?
 
You'll see one from me in the next few weeks as at the moment I'm in the process of growing the balls necessary to take the 720 mg I've obtained to address my cocaine addiction.

Here's hoping my little "confession" here will make them grow faster... :\

Wish me luck fellas.
 
Thanks, Beenhead.

Ground Control is in place and the launch is scheduled for January 25.

For the first time in my life I'm feeling a fear I can't define, but then I tell myself maybe it's what I would have felt if I hadn't spent the last 20 years anesthetizing it with cocaine. Now it's time to face it down; find out where it came from and how to expunge it--my own personal beastie whose sole intent has been to destroy my life and, well...I've decided the fucker has overstayed his welcome.

I have an 8-year-old little boy who doesn't understand why his daddy has been gone for the last year--and good god the tears are falling down my face as I type this--the revulsion I feel about myself...I can't even express it. He's such a wonderful little person--and I've chosen a drug over him? It makes me sick.

I make me sick. I don't even know if there's redemption for this kind of thing.

lol...wow, what a pity party I'm having for myself. I'm probably making y'all sick now too. Well I'll try to make it up to you with the best damn trip report that's been put up in a long time. It's the least I can do for subjecting you guys to this two-bit melodrama... :D
 
There is redemption for this sort of thing, get better and be there for your son. We are all here for you, everyone makes mistakes, and what separates people is how they deal with them. Some face them, some do not. Its not that you got better got a better paying job. It is taking care for your family, and doing what is right!

Hang in there brother
 
Good luck, tobala! I wasn't aware of your addiction. I suspect a lot of us here hold some sort of addictions. I know I do.

It sounds like you've passed the point of no return with yourself. I know with me, I had many instances of realizing my problems but I never let them sink in enough to truly get past my self-delusional walls, and I let it get brushed back under the rug. I finally let it sink in aropund the new year and since then I've been unwilling to let myself slip back. Now, I have had my issues for fvar fewer than 20 years. But I think with the help of ibogaine, you're on the right path. Good luck man, seriously. I'll send you as muich positive thought as possible, in case it helps. :)
 
Xorkoth said:
I wasn't aware of your addiction.
Click to expand...
I wasn't aware of it either--because I assigned some very creative labels to it. ;)

Xorkoth said:
I know with me, I had many instances of realizing my problems but I never let them sink in enough to truly get past my self-delusional walls, and I let it get brushed back under the rug.
Click to expand...
Agreed on that, bro'. If we were in the construction (or housecleaning) business we would have made a fortune.

Thanks for the positive vibes guys. They mean more to me than you will ever know.

I know that this sort of thing is frowned upon, but I'm thinking about signing in next Friday night while under the influence, kind of like Your Man Live from Bwitiville. Again, we'd all like to avoid the usual "hey d00ds I'm wasted" kind of thing, but this will probably be quite different.

Anyway, I'll try if it's at all possible. I'm looking at this as a gift right now and if it works for me I will definitely feel obligated--even if only in some small way--to make such gifts accessible to others. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

One more time, a big thanks to everyone. Now back to the jokes and one-liners. This "being serious" stuff...well I can't keep that up for very long, y'know. :D
 
I know, right? I was starting to get confused. To the point that I began to doubt my own sanity and ultimately, the validity of the physical universe as being objective.
 
Ibogaine HCL for Opiate Addiction

About a year ago I reached a point in my addiction to heroin where I just couldn't stand the apathy of my lifestyle. I did a lot of research on ibogaine. I saw that some people had died from ibogaine, but the odds were very small, and I took the risk into my calculations and decided it was worth trying it.

After a very long time, I found a reliable supply online. I ordered some for a very expensive price, but I figured if it works, it will be cheap compared to funding my heroin habit. I received my ibogaine fairly quickly, took 4 days of from work and got ready to do it on the weekend.

I had read that the experience is suppose to be like a movie showing you important parts of your life that lead to your use. And that is what I was expecting. I was 21 years old, male, 300 lbs and I had been addicted for about 3 years. Leading up to the weekend I used like crazy, planning to never use again. Friday night arrived, I did a last shot, and locked my remaining heroin in a lock box ( which I planned to give away if this worked).

I awoke Saturday, early in the afternoon, feeling withdrawal coming on. I got the 2.5 grams of ibogaine, mixed it in a cup of water and chugged it down. Let me say, that is the most vile tasting thing I have ever tasted. It burnt my throat and tasted like battery acid. I had a friend over at my house to keep an eye on me. I went to my room, had a gallon of water, and a bucket in case I vomited.

I layed in my bed waiting for the effects of the herb to take hold. I thought about my addiction and how I wanted to stop using, and I tried to relax myself, taking deep breaths. At about an hour I started to feel the effects, my withdrawal went away. The beginning was like LSD, I began to forget I took anything and started having doubts. I kept standing up going to the door, wondering if I took too much; maybe I should go to the hospital?

I got myself to lay back down and accept my fate. My body was buzzing with electricity and my heart rate was fast. On my ceiling I began to see a tree with a face in it, and I accepted him as my guide of this trip to a clean life. Soon he started approaching me, getting closer and I would look away, I kept doing this. Then I decided I needed to stare him down because facing my fears was part of moving on with life, so I stared at him and he entered my body, making me buzz like mad. I buzzed so much I could hear nothing else, then it stopped.

I started to feel that I was now trapped inside my head, that I was separate from my body. I felt that I was going crazy, and only I was sane. It felt like the rest of my mind was consuming the sane me, very scary.

At this point I left reality, my body, the room; and I only returned when I swallowed every once in a while, 30 mins? When I swallowed I could view my body from above, then returned to the dream world.

In the dream world, I remember being caught in very strange mind loops and I felt a connection to a primordial being. In the beginning I remember something like a simple arcade game that kept repeating, until I corrected something wrong with the process, like a game where little creatures filed in stacks and I needed to move just one.... (sorry for the confusion it is hard to explain)

Next I remember being in a slaughter house killing pigs with a bunch of hillbillies, and this strange music was playing. This kept happening with a little pig running in at the end.

Next I remember living in this little shitty shack in the woods with 2 other people who I don't remember. I just walked around the woods.

The next part felt like the longest. I was young, like 7 yrs old. It felt like I was reliving a child hood, but not mine. The area was unfamiliar, the kids I was playing with were unknown. We played outside in the cold. It was wet. I remember feeling very unhappy.

That was the end of the intense portion of the trip. The common thread was I experienced things I didn't like and I was unhappy. I took this to be like my life or how my life would turn out if I didn't change. I got up to piss it had been like 15 hours since I began!

When I layed down again, remember being in the clouds. I was with my brother, his wife and a beautiful girl. I felt jealous of them because I wanted what he had, and I could've if not for drugs. I couldn't get with the girl, and it was very dreamy, and I felt like I was floating.

Next I remember it felt like I was laying in the snow as a NAVY SEAL, probably because my room was cold. This went on all night, with me regaining consciousness every hour or so, then back into the snow, spying in the woods.

I woke up in the afternoon about 26 hours after the trip began, and I felt dope sick, bad. I tried to get up but it was very hard, I had trouble walking. My vision was rotated 90 degrees. I was scared. I made my way to the living room and fell on the couch. My friend was there, he was a user and dopesick as well.

My mind felt fried, I couldn't remember much of anything, including where I had put the key to the lock box, so we lay there in misery. I'd get up every couple hours searching for the key with no luck, and I thought the box could not be broken into. Finally after 8 hours of laying there, I told my friend to try and break into the box. He did it with in a minute. I mixed a shot, had trouble hitting, but finally did. I instantly felt better, and within 2 minutes remembered the key was under my bed!

I was very disappointed that I spent a grand on something that didn't work, but I had to try. Plus, I know people who it has worked for. They were both in there late 30s, and had been using for 20 years. And it is said it works better for older people for addiction purposes. I definitely felt like I had been on an important trip that would contribute to my life.

About 9 months after the ibogaine trip, I was arrested for felony heroin possession. Spending time in prison was a big wake up call for me. It was just 3 days, but I learned I'm not the type of person who can feel fine with being in prison. I've been clean for almost 5 months, and I'm on a suboxone program. Initially I went to a residential rehab for 2 months, and I now do group counseling.

It is definitely difficult to stay clean, but I think about prison, the things I had to do, and the people I hurt.

I hope this helps some. Feel free to send me a PM or email me at [email protected]
 
gomer, thanks a lot for that. It seems that you had a serious opiate addiction, and considering that ibogaine can reset receptors and reduce tolerance, I'm glad that taking heroin so soon after the ibogaine didn't bring you to any harm.

I'm a stimulant addict and from what I understand, ibogaine seems to have an even better success rate for that than it does for opiates.

T-20 hours. I'm nervous but in an odd way looking forward to taking a first step, finally, after 20 years.
 
thanks for the report, I wonder why it has such drastic effects for some people yet, nothing more than an intense psychedelic state.

Any thoughts?

Possibly you were not ready to quit, and you truly needed to hit a low. IM sorry it didnt, but its great you are clean now.
 
Yeah, I think it's just that I wasn't ready yet. I still appreciate the experience, and that was the most intense trip I've ever been through.

If I ever did it again, I would definitely put it into gelcaps or something because the taste was rediculous.
 
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