Stupid Girl.

[up all night]

Empty hours and idle hands,
Recipe for disaster.
It's 2am.
Are you sleeping or screwing?
I know how much you love your late night fucks.
Do you look at her and smile?
Are you sure you made the right choice?
So many questions
But I'll never know the answers
Just run circles in my mind
Wondering and wandering.
Have you told her you love her?
Did you mean it?
Does she know your favourite colour?
Your favourite song?
Has she met your Dad?
I just want to know how far she's buried in your life now.
I wonder if she knows your plans.
The three kids and the suburban living.
I never thought that lifestyle suited you
And always told you as much
But maybe she believes in you.
Maybe she supports you where I let you down....
Just when I think I'm finding that balance
A day without tears
A night slept through
Seeing the possibilities in a new man,
You wander back
In my imagine perfection
With your emotional baggage
And your endearing flaws
And I stumble
Because I'm no longer watching where I'm going
Choosing to turn my head
To see where you are.
I'm trapped in that limbo
With my head and my heart fighting a bitter battle
May the strongest contender
Guide me to happiness
Because I sure as hell can't make it on my own.
And now everythings so distorted
Twisting away from old realities....
The centre of my universe
Arrives on my doorstep.
All big arms and strong words
Promises broken before they're uttered
Lies I believe whole heartedly
Falling into you again...
And before I understand the brevity of consequence
The bed where I cry myself to sleep at night
Becomes the home of hope rekindled
I found the boy I'd lost between my sheets.
But even with the heat of your body
Still warming the mattress beside me
I realise as you leave
You never said love.
Stupid girl.

 

[Young Alien Type]

*sigh*
Being moved by your emotions is not being stupid, it's being manipulated. And don't give me the "it takes two" speech.
I *heart* you, and hope that this all turns out for the best.

 

[TiggerLuvsX]

Have you told her you love her?
Did you mean it?
Does she know your favourite colour?
Your favourite song?
Has she met your Dad?
I just want to know how far she's buried in your life now.
That was wonderful. I think those things every day. It is getting easier now. I also have someone else but when she comes back in my life....i can't help but still love her. I feel ya and it will get better. Ok, that's it....