Stop lying to myself

[Unregistered00089]

I am again dosing on benzos, opiates, stims and psychedelics
not even putting much of a space between them
everyday
if it isn't one benzo, it's another, if it's not psychedelics it's hypnotics and so on
I don't take an insane amount of them, I don't even know what kind of fucked up addiction I'm building up, but everytime I'll miss an opiate I'll feel extremely dizzy and powerless, about to throw up and basically about to die..
not only that, I've started smoking 10-15 cigs a day, which basically makes me labeled as a smoker by most doctors
fuck
Every morning to college I feel like collapsing, bus or foot, until I take an amp, then I just basically feel like a robot with a bad stomach...

Ok, how badly am I doing?

 

[Eveleivibe]

Only YOU know / can say how badly you are doing. We are not here to judge you. We can only support you n listen to you. Apart from this, I don't know what else to say in response to your thread. But felt it deserved a response.
Could you tell us more on what you want so that we can best support you?
Do you want off all drugs or just some? Do you think you may have a problem? How can you help yourself? Have you tried counselling/therapy? Would you consider alternatives like suboxone/methadone? Roughly how muchdrugs you are/have been doing?
Take care,
Evey x

 

[Maya]

I don't take an insane amount of them, I don't even know what kind of fucked up addiction I'm building up, but everytime I'll miss an opiate I'll feel extremely dizzy and powerless, about to throw up and basically about to die. Every morning to college I feel like collapsing, bus or foot, until I take an amp, then I just basically feel like a robot with a bad stomach...

IMO, you are experiencing this because your body has gotten dependent on taking opiates and amps and without them, you are going into some type of withdrawal hence you are experiencing dizziness and being powerless.

Like what Evey already mentioned, we are not here to judge you and what we can do is support. I hope that you will consider some type of therapy and detox to bring back the health of your body and to not rely on drugs.

 

[ratbagfungirl]

If I were you I'd rock up at an ATODS clinic. (alcohol, tobacco and other drugs) They are usually located in out patient areas of hospitals in case they need to get a toxicology report to know exactly whats in your system n can prescribe natural or synthetic remedies to bring your tox level back down to a safe level. Don't be put off by being near hospital coz I'm guessing if you continue much longer you will end up there anyway. when toxicity levels get too high you're body starts to shut down different functions in an attempt to prevent death. ring 13health or any drug hotline, you can withhold your identity but be honest so they can give you most accurate advice. sounds like your heart and blood pressure are high, maybe way too high and under stress. You would be extremely dehydrated can be identified by dark urine. Your tox levels would be at a dangerously high level and causing you kidney, liver, lungs, stomach, not to mention you brain to be not functioning at normal capacity and could stop working completely if kept in toxic, distressed state. I guess you could compare it to eating your own shit, drinking urine and nothing else. How long do you think your body could hold out??!! Go get a blood to test your levels of toxicity in all major organs. Drink heaps of water...or electrolyte drinks but not red bull or v or shit like that. it will increase heart rate even more. I know someone who had a stroke at 27 due to damage done from regular drug abuse. Don't get me wrong..I like the highs n dread the lows...but if I had your symptoms etc....I'd be walking into the emergency room really soon. best of luck.xx