silverfucked
Bluelighter
First off, wow I havent been on since like what, 2004! I actually used to be a moderation back in those glory days. It seems the forum has grown, and almost every topic is search engine relevant, along with megathreads, to which this post will most likely need to call home..Anyways.
Some background for experience and qualification purposes. In, 20001 I began using poppy seed tea/pharma opiates for about three years. 2005 I began shooting heroin. That same year I went on methadone for about eight months until I was forced into a horrible detox. Like I said, I basically stating this stuff to establish that I am not opiate naive.
On poppy seed tea. The shit deserves every bit as much respect that heroin gets. I relapsed after 2years clean on tabs, and quickly began chasing the high via poppy seed tea. Over the span of four years my habit became daily and every increasing, starting with a half pound, and up until a month ago 3.5 pounds if I wanted to get high, 2.5pounds were the bare minimum to keep me well. So, some observations on the subject:
1. The issue of potency of unwashed seeds should not be dismissed as bullshit/weak etc. In the last year, I attempted to get high on street opiates many times. I wouldnt feel any of the "codones" until I pushed in to the 80mg mark. At may peak addiction, it would require about 120-150mg oxycodone to catch a good nod for the day, AND THIS WAS SOMEONE GETTING HIGH ON POPPY SEEDS.
Once I bought a quarter gram of heroin that people were going to sleep standing on a half a point(granted they were nontolerant). I had to do the quarter gram to get me where I needed to be.
So poppy seed tea, if you find the right brand, is ridiculously, retardedly potent. By playing with pharms, crunching the equianalgesic dose numbers, I came to the conclusion that 1 pound of the most potent seeds you can find is roughly equivalent to taking 1 and a half roxy 30's, or roughly 100mg morphine sulfate give or take. THESE EQUIANALGESIC DOSES THAT I JUST WROTE COMPARE SUBJECTIVE PEAK EXPERIENCE OF PST TO THE PHARMS. Of course pound for pound, oxycodone is going to yield a more euphoric experience. I am relating the quantities required to offset withdrawals.
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PST is a completely different beast from pharms. After years of observation I've concluded that onset is rapid, but peak effcts occur somewhere at the 6-8 hour mark, and then begin diminishing over the next 16 hours. (Poppy seed tea taught me that one can be under the influence of opiates and in withdrawals at the same time, more on that later) In a way, after many years of daily use, I 'stabilized' at 3pounds and it was very similar to a long acting opiate in that regard. One dose between 9am-noon everyday kept the withdrawals away. I eventually learned how time my onset into withdrawal at the times I was expected to have sex, so I could appear normal..It became all about walking a tightrope of procuring, dosing, hiding, timing peaks and valleys to avoid suspicion...BUt it became very apparent, upon trying to jump off, that the withdrawals from PST were so violent, that there would be no way I could endure work and a relationship suffering from them. 36 hours dose free would have my shitting in a manor that felt like reverse dry heaving. and then there was just the plain dry heaving as well. An interesting atypical withdrawal symptom unique to PST is coughing so hard that it would trigger the gag reflex and result in vomiting. I think this is because its such a strong antitussive and I had been chain smoking for a couple years at that point IDK.
I was in hell. To pay for such a habit was infeasible. At that level, even the cheapest seeds (8bucks for a half pound) cost about 30bucks a day to use..Unfortunately the most plentiful ones were considerably more expensive. So I shoplifted the fuck out of them. I learned alot about stealing..Again with the tightrope, I learned that shoplifting the days dose the night before after midnight resulted in the least probability of being caught, as LP doesnt seem to work those hours. I did get caught once. I put up a fight and the guy submitted me MMA style. I firmly believe this is why I didnt go to jail that day. I never had any money. I was driving hundreds of miles a week trying to get what I needed. I was late to work. All this just to feel normal, not high..the highs stopped years ago. I lived with the fact that one day I would get arrested again and my life would all come crumbling down as a shit my guts out in a jailcell..Job, girlfriend, family..No one knew.
SO fuck it. I decided to get on a Suboxone program. It couldnt be any worse than the hell I was living in.. WHich brings me to
2. Suboxone induction from PST is an atypical experience that caught me off guard a bit.
I knew all about precipitated withdrawals. I also knoew that this PST I was doing lasted for ever..Unfortunately I had to work..My induction was set on a monday...I got high as normal up until that thursday. then I cut my dose in half, and started mild withdrawals on saturday..My last dose was one pound on saturday night at midnight to get some sleep..it worked..that put 36 hours between me and my induction. Sunday sucked, because I had to work..However, I was alarmed because my withdrawals werent onseting with the ferocity of heroin..It was like slowly wading into a WD pool and by the end of my shift I was only knee deep..I got about 4 hours of sleep. THe RLS and gagging started at about 7am, three fucking hours before my induction.. I drove to the office and sorta paced their lobby for an hour then they took me back..My eyes were saucers. Pit sweats drenched the shirt..My blood pressure was at a cool 185/95. Conversation was painful.
I writhed in the office for another 30 till he came in..and we talked and he brought me a strip. I took a quarter. NOthing happened..I took a half, in 15min my RLS had stopped..I finished the strip and within 30min I was feeling markedly better..I got my script and left..
Starting in the afternoon there was a war going on in my brain..It was as if I was in full withdrawals, but it no longer was agonizing..it was like something I could sit back and observe them..I was shitting liquid every twenty minutes. My eyes were fully dilated. Still freezing. At one point I wept. All this, but I still felt so much better than I had at 7am. I felt blank. I didnt feel good at all. But I didnt feel bad. It was like a mute button had been pushed. I came to the conclusion this is what it was like to be "fixed" but not high.
I bumped up to 12mg the next day and felt the same..16mg the third day, felt the same...Woke up the fourth day, dosed and it was as if the clouds parted and the angels sang...Suddenly I felt amazing. Vibrant. Full of life. Wanting to participate. Hungry. Horny. All the good stuff..Its been that way ever since..Which leads me to believe that with PST, the full agonist withdrawal your are going to feel for up to five days before the subs really click into place..I can see how others would give up on day three and go back to getting high..but icouldnt go back to hell and decided to stay in purgatory...the medicine finally worked, it just had a hardy battle with PST.
What you should gather is that Poppy Seed Tea is perhaps one of the most addicting opiate experiences out there.. I could eat roxys like candy. High dose subs BARELY covered the withdrawals until about a week into it. 60 bucks a day in heroin felt pretty similar to kick.
As for that, you're actually addicted to 100 chemicals or whater..well not really..now that the subs are working, its pretty apparent that I was addicted to high dose morphine...If anything the long half life is due to prodrugs found in the opium, along with enzyme competitors, or even inhibtors.
I now have my life back..I dropped the 16mg a day I've stabilized at 12mg, and I'm actually decently high off of it, now that my blood serum levels have accummulated due to this shits ridiculous half life..I may drop down to eight a day..If my insurance didnt cover it, I probably could only afford 30 a month, and still be broke as fuck. But also, I know 12mg is still a HIGH DOSE of an opiate with a huge half life..three years of this and I'll find myself with a whole new monkey to kick. So the lower I can go the better... I'm thinking first three months 8-12mgs..whatever I land on by the summers end, reduce by 1mg per month..once im down to 2mg daily, reduced by .5mg per month.
So there you have it...I typed all this, because I had all these questions and not many answers where to be found. Now that I know the answers, I'm throwing them out into the BL universe. I'll hang around to read the replies, but I'll probably post again in another ten years lol.
Some background for experience and qualification purposes. In, 20001 I began using poppy seed tea/pharma opiates for about three years. 2005 I began shooting heroin. That same year I went on methadone for about eight months until I was forced into a horrible detox. Like I said, I basically stating this stuff to establish that I am not opiate naive.
On poppy seed tea. The shit deserves every bit as much respect that heroin gets. I relapsed after 2years clean on tabs, and quickly began chasing the high via poppy seed tea. Over the span of four years my habit became daily and every increasing, starting with a half pound, and up until a month ago 3.5 pounds if I wanted to get high, 2.5pounds were the bare minimum to keep me well. So, some observations on the subject:
1. The issue of potency of unwashed seeds should not be dismissed as bullshit/weak etc. In the last year, I attempted to get high on street opiates many times. I wouldnt feel any of the "codones" until I pushed in to the 80mg mark. At may peak addiction, it would require about 120-150mg oxycodone to catch a good nod for the day, AND THIS WAS SOMEONE GETTING HIGH ON POPPY SEEDS.
Once I bought a quarter gram of heroin that people were going to sleep standing on a half a point(granted they were nontolerant). I had to do the quarter gram to get me where I needed to be.
So poppy seed tea, if you find the right brand, is ridiculously, retardedly potent. By playing with pharms, crunching the equianalgesic dose numbers, I came to the conclusion that 1 pound of the most potent seeds you can find is roughly equivalent to taking 1 and a half roxy 30's, or roughly 100mg morphine sulfate give or take. THESE EQUIANALGESIC DOSES THAT I JUST WROTE COMPARE SUBJECTIVE PEAK EXPERIENCE OF PST TO THE PHARMS. Of course pound for pound, oxycodone is going to yield a more euphoric experience. I am relating the quantities required to offset withdrawals.
------
PST is a completely different beast from pharms. After years of observation I've concluded that onset is rapid, but peak effcts occur somewhere at the 6-8 hour mark, and then begin diminishing over the next 16 hours. (Poppy seed tea taught me that one can be under the influence of opiates and in withdrawals at the same time, more on that later) In a way, after many years of daily use, I 'stabilized' at 3pounds and it was very similar to a long acting opiate in that regard. One dose between 9am-noon everyday kept the withdrawals away. I eventually learned how time my onset into withdrawal at the times I was expected to have sex, so I could appear normal..It became all about walking a tightrope of procuring, dosing, hiding, timing peaks and valleys to avoid suspicion...BUt it became very apparent, upon trying to jump off, that the withdrawals from PST were so violent, that there would be no way I could endure work and a relationship suffering from them. 36 hours dose free would have my shitting in a manor that felt like reverse dry heaving. and then there was just the plain dry heaving as well. An interesting atypical withdrawal symptom unique to PST is coughing so hard that it would trigger the gag reflex and result in vomiting. I think this is because its such a strong antitussive and I had been chain smoking for a couple years at that point IDK.
I was in hell. To pay for such a habit was infeasible. At that level, even the cheapest seeds (8bucks for a half pound) cost about 30bucks a day to use..Unfortunately the most plentiful ones were considerably more expensive. So I shoplifted the fuck out of them. I learned alot about stealing..Again with the tightrope, I learned that shoplifting the days dose the night before after midnight resulted in the least probability of being caught, as LP doesnt seem to work those hours. I did get caught once. I put up a fight and the guy submitted me MMA style. I firmly believe this is why I didnt go to jail that day. I never had any money. I was driving hundreds of miles a week trying to get what I needed. I was late to work. All this just to feel normal, not high..the highs stopped years ago. I lived with the fact that one day I would get arrested again and my life would all come crumbling down as a shit my guts out in a jailcell..Job, girlfriend, family..No one knew.
SO fuck it. I decided to get on a Suboxone program. It couldnt be any worse than the hell I was living in.. WHich brings me to
2. Suboxone induction from PST is an atypical experience that caught me off guard a bit.
I knew all about precipitated withdrawals. I also knoew that this PST I was doing lasted for ever..Unfortunately I had to work..My induction was set on a monday...I got high as normal up until that thursday. then I cut my dose in half, and started mild withdrawals on saturday..My last dose was one pound on saturday night at midnight to get some sleep..it worked..that put 36 hours between me and my induction. Sunday sucked, because I had to work..However, I was alarmed because my withdrawals werent onseting with the ferocity of heroin..It was like slowly wading into a WD pool and by the end of my shift I was only knee deep..I got about 4 hours of sleep. THe RLS and gagging started at about 7am, three fucking hours before my induction.. I drove to the office and sorta paced their lobby for an hour then they took me back..My eyes were saucers. Pit sweats drenched the shirt..My blood pressure was at a cool 185/95. Conversation was painful.
I writhed in the office for another 30 till he came in..and we talked and he brought me a strip. I took a quarter. NOthing happened..I took a half, in 15min my RLS had stopped..I finished the strip and within 30min I was feeling markedly better..I got my script and left..
Starting in the afternoon there was a war going on in my brain..It was as if I was in full withdrawals, but it no longer was agonizing..it was like something I could sit back and observe them..I was shitting liquid every twenty minutes. My eyes were fully dilated. Still freezing. At one point I wept. All this, but I still felt so much better than I had at 7am. I felt blank. I didnt feel good at all. But I didnt feel bad. It was like a mute button had been pushed. I came to the conclusion this is what it was like to be "fixed" but not high.
I bumped up to 12mg the next day and felt the same..16mg the third day, felt the same...Woke up the fourth day, dosed and it was as if the clouds parted and the angels sang...Suddenly I felt amazing. Vibrant. Full of life. Wanting to participate. Hungry. Horny. All the good stuff..Its been that way ever since..Which leads me to believe that with PST, the full agonist withdrawal your are going to feel for up to five days before the subs really click into place..I can see how others would give up on day three and go back to getting high..but icouldnt go back to hell and decided to stay in purgatory...the medicine finally worked, it just had a hardy battle with PST.
What you should gather is that Poppy Seed Tea is perhaps one of the most addicting opiate experiences out there.. I could eat roxys like candy. High dose subs BARELY covered the withdrawals until about a week into it. 60 bucks a day in heroin felt pretty similar to kick.
As for that, you're actually addicted to 100 chemicals or whater..well not really..now that the subs are working, its pretty apparent that I was addicted to high dose morphine...If anything the long half life is due to prodrugs found in the opium, along with enzyme competitors, or even inhibtors.
I now have my life back..I dropped the 16mg a day I've stabilized at 12mg, and I'm actually decently high off of it, now that my blood serum levels have accummulated due to this shits ridiculous half life..I may drop down to eight a day..If my insurance didnt cover it, I probably could only afford 30 a month, and still be broke as fuck. But also, I know 12mg is still a HIGH DOSE of an opiate with a huge half life..three years of this and I'll find myself with a whole new monkey to kick. So the lower I can go the better... I'm thinking first three months 8-12mgs..whatever I land on by the summers end, reduce by 1mg per month..once im down to 2mg daily, reduced by .5mg per month.
So there you have it...I typed all this, because I had all these questions and not many answers where to be found. Now that I know the answers, I'm throwing them out into the BL universe. I'll hang around to read the replies, but I'll probably post again in another ten years lol.
I realized that I couldn't quit, and this is when I wanted to with everything I had..it was like bupe or suicide..that kind of desperation..