Some problems in my relationship.

[SomeGiirl94]

Hey. I am 21 and my boyfriend is 25. We met a year ago and he has always been caring, gentle, respectful with me. But I am hurt by some things he is doing. We live in a country where people are close minded and where if a girl isn't virgin, she is a w*ore. So when we first dated, he asked for sex and I refused. He didn't insist but asked that we do other things like oral sex, touching each other and all. First, I said no because I had never done anything with anyone before, even kissing. But after some months, I accepted. We started doing things together and that made me even more attached to him because well he is my first. And whenever we are doing things together, I want more.. We deciced to do it but when I accepted, he said no that he doesn't want anymore, that now that he loves me more than before, he doesn't want us to have sex. That we can still have oral sex but nothing more because I am virgin. With time, he also said that he doesn't want us to have oral sex anymore and refuse that we see each other alone because now that he has stringer feelings for me, he doesn't want anything anymore before we get married. I am hurt because I accepted everything with him because I love him and he just did them with me because hr wanted to enjoy himself and now that "he loves me more", he doesn't want anymore. Whenever I ask him that we go alone somewhere to spend a day without doing anything, he says no that if he finds himself alone with me we surely will do things and he doesn't want to. The thing is that I feel rejected.. And the problem isn't with my look. I have a hot body and a beautiful face, I always go to the gym and eat healthy so the problem is obviously not with myself... I mean he is very respectful, gentle, always buy me gifs, always caring, my family loves him, so does mine.. He is always honest with me, always talking to me on the phone, after his work, he doesn't even go and see his friends anymore, he just calls me and we talk for hours so I don't know what to do.. I can't help myself but ask him everytime that I want us to do things like before, not to enjoy myself but just because while doing these things, I felt loved and I guess all girls in the world like the feeling that their boyfriend find them attractive and sexy.. But all he says is: No, I don't want to do anything abymore before marriage. Why did he convince me to do them with him if he doesn't want anymore or knew it was "wrong"? What should I do?

 

[ed.ston]

@SomeGiirl94: I'm sorry if this sounds harsh but I call bullshit on his part. Usually when something like this happens there's a hidden reason for it. I hope I'm wrong and he's just shy or something. Is he a virgin also?

 

[pofacedhoe]

i just think its weird that he now thinks you are to be respected and to not try it on with you for sex but before it was okay?

kind of hints that at first he was going to have sex with you but not see you as a serious relationship.

is there a date for this marriage?

 

[Pretty_Diamonds]

^ Yeah...

Does he plan on marrying you soon?

It does sound kind of strange.
He either loves you so much and wants to wait (why? culture? religion?) or is getting some action on the side (and feels too guilty).
Have you talked to him about it?

 

[SS373dOH]

This dude respects the hell out you, not to take that away from you! I mean no normal dude is going choose not ruining that before marriage, over getting a crack at that! But I bet if you initiate things, he won't be able to stop, and if he does, this man has the will power of a monk!
I'd marry him pronto.


- Hopeless 7nos