some more

[anhalonium9]

broken patterns to
------------------------


patterns on the floor
i saw nightmares (come true)

patterns on the ceiling
i saw them in you



1.21.05



traffic
-------


there is space between place
where i linger too long

in the time of red and green
there is the wrong




1.22.05




colors
-------



like the colors of my eye
red and blue
when i get high





1.24.05

 

[blahblahblah]

Different... I like the red eye'd and blue comment and the traffic light green, hit the gas. (I am partial to the mention of colors as they invoke an immediate image background for me)

Patterns in the ceiling? What were you going for with that? A jilted intoxicated body laying on the floor lost in the endless tapestries of the hallucinogenic ceiling, or a soft image of some girls face in the ceiling of the clouds, the sky is the limit

?

 

[anhalonium9]

it could be both. its about balances, i think.

 

[on the road]

i definately like this better. I do like that they're short, but that you have many of posted together...makes it more complete.

The rhyming and flow goes great together with a nice abrupt ending--cool!!

 

[on the road]

there is space between place
where i linger too long

in the time of red and green
there is the wrong

awesome, totally awesome