I have this social anxiety where I feel uncomfortable in groups more than two people while at work. I feel like all the attention is on me and find it hard to stand in a group to talk. Also in public like at big events I tend to get tunnel vision where I look down and get anxiety when I see certain people for no reason it just triggers me to think oh no i'm messing up, and this leads me to over correct and I feel like a lot of people are laughing at me and saying things about me. What could this be? anyone experience this?
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Mental Health Social anxiety
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herbavore
Bluelight Crew
It is definitely social anxiety and there can be any number of complex factors that contribute to it. You may have absorbed a lot of shame during your youngest years--maybe from your family, maybe from the culture and your relative acceptance or non acceptance within it, or maybe just because you have a particularly sensitive nature and the world can be overwhelming in a way it is not for thicker skinned people. regardless of where it comes from, CBT and Mindfulness are two pretty successful therapies that you can try. There is no magic in them--just practical ways to retrain the brain and change the anxious thinking by strengthening the rational mind. Breathing techniques are simple yet very effective. It isn't exaggerated or noticeable to anyone else--just calm, conscious breathing with a focus on the breath can be a first small step. I've spent the better part of my life completely anxious and yet at almost 62 I find it rarely even occurs. part of that is age and part of that is learning strategies to stop sabotaging myself.
Erikmen
Bluelight Crew
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Yes. I believe most of us are anxious in one way or another depending on the occasion or the moment you are going through.
Most of those who are great in speaking to crowds have once been anxious, maybe in their younger years. Some admit they still can feel anxiety (now only for seconds) but that's because they have already gotten used to it. Or worked it out somehow.
My son told me one of these days that his teacher shared with them he was nervous, or is, every time the school year starts with new people. I could say the same about me or my colleagues.
I think you could try to learn how to cope with these feelings knowing that you are not alone.
Therapy would work immensely, and it wouldn't really take a long time. Maybe 6 months, and from there you'll see how it goes. You should never let anxiety get in the way of your life.
People get used to these feelings as they grow older.
Most of those who are great in speaking to crowds have once been anxious, maybe in their younger years. Some admit they still can feel anxiety (now only for seconds) but that's because they have already gotten used to it. Or worked it out somehow.
My son told me one of these days that his teacher shared with them he was nervous, or is, every time the school year starts with new people. I could say the same about me or my colleagues.
I think you could try to learn how to cope with these feelings knowing that you are not alone.
Therapy would work immensely, and it wouldn't really take a long time. Maybe 6 months, and from there you'll see how it goes. You should never let anxiety get in the way of your life.
People get used to these feelings as they grow older.
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LearntYoung
Bluelighter
Too drugged up to read this through, but I'll do my small, but (hopefully) usefull little speach on this issue:
Social anxiety is a confidence issue and it can be overcome by either professional assistance (regular talks with a psychologist/psychiatrist) or with a lot of guts.
That second one is simple, but you require to step far out of your comfort zone. You should force yourself into unkown social territory. That way, you'll have no choice but to interact. At first this'll be horrible, you'll find yourself completely mute or just saying the most inappropriate and awkward thing out of the tension you experience. However, when repeating this "excercise" more often, you'll grow comfortable around uncomfortable situations and you'll developped a relaxed state of mind. That's step one. From there on out, you'll already feel way more confident in whatever situation you're in and think clearly and confidently. That confidence is key to the actual social interaction, but becoming the social creature society expects you to be, will require experience from convident conversations.
Then there's option 3: Medicate with benzo's. This'll help for a while, until you're addicted and you'll experience withdrawal anxiety. Don't go that road.
Social anxiety is a confidence issue and it can be overcome by either professional assistance (regular talks with a psychologist/psychiatrist) or with a lot of guts.
That second one is simple, but you require to step far out of your comfort zone. You should force yourself into unkown social territory. That way, you'll have no choice but to interact. At first this'll be horrible, you'll find yourself completely mute or just saying the most inappropriate and awkward thing out of the tension you experience. However, when repeating this "excercise" more often, you'll grow comfortable around uncomfortable situations and you'll developped a relaxed state of mind. That's step one. From there on out, you'll already feel way more confident in whatever situation you're in and think clearly and confidently. That confidence is key to the actual social interaction, but becoming the social creature society expects you to be, will require experience from convident conversations.
Then there's option 3: Medicate with benzo's. This'll help for a while, until you're addicted and you'll experience withdrawal anxiety. Don't go that road.
jammin83
Bluelighter
Im a fan of non drug methods and I agree its a confidence issue. I used to get it a lot and still deal with anxiety from time to time but it has improved a lot over the years. A lot of people use benzos but I would try and avoid those. They can make your anxiety worse in the long term, at least they did for me. The withdrawal was totally fucked and they affected my memory a lot. Some people can take them long term, but not really for social anxiety. Definitely don't buy any RC benzos they end up causing a lot of problems for people.
There is a drug that seems to be available now in most places from russia called Afobazole. I have never taken it and I try not to medicate my anxiety a whole lot anymore but this one seems pretty good. No dependency or withdrawal from it and seems pretty interesting. Its neuroprotectavie, non-sedative, and not recreational and doesn't get you high. I have never taken it but if you feel like you need to medicate it then that stuff seems pretty safe.
There is a drug that seems to be available now in most places from russia called Afobazole. I have never taken it and I try not to medicate my anxiety a whole lot anymore but this one seems pretty good. No dependency or withdrawal from it and seems pretty interesting. Its neuroprotectavie, non-sedative, and not recreational and doesn't get you high. I have never taken it but if you feel like you need to medicate it then that stuff seems pretty safe.
Burnt Offerings
Bluelight Crew
Honestly, a lot of that shit goes away when you get older. Anxiety as an actual medical condition (i.e. a disorder with the core symptom of anxiety, which is actually very rare among the general population...of course almost everyone experiences some sort of anxiety as part of day-to-day life but that's different) is chronic, but certain forms of anxious thinking greatly lessen with age IME.
Especially social anxiety. It's tiring to constantly worry about what others think of you and eventually you just stop giving a shit, honestly.
Especially social anxiety. It's tiring to constantly worry about what others think of you and eventually you just stop giving a shit, honestly.
Thank you for spacing option 3 seperate from the other options. Benzo withdrawal is hell! A person, especially Erikmen's son, (not that I know his son, or the severity of his anxiety) or any child or young adult for that matter, should avoid Benzo Road at all costs! 