yes, it's been talked about 5 million and 1/2 times by now, but it still bothers the fuck out of me.
yes, I am a raging heroin addict w/ multiple overdoses and 2 DUI's and a million other things, but I have finally come around and have found a reason to live, do well, and go forward w/ life. I am in the final stages of getting my license back, saved up close to 10k to buy a car out right and then put all the money toward insurance and getting it on the road.
but what do I still get!? I get.. "your voice sounds different". "you've been acting different the last 2 weeks". "I really doubt you would pass a drug test right now". and a million more other things to the point where I threw a punch threw my fathers van and he blames "drug use" as to why I would be mad and punch.
yes, wrong thing to do, but he and I been battling for years.. years and years before drugs even started.
that was weeks ago, but today I got it more and more.. seriously, how do you handle this? yes, its my fault because I was the fucking super junkie for the past 12yrs w/ jail time, multiple programs and detoxes, multiple DUI's and totaled cars, etc. yes, I fucked up BIG TIME! but when do I get a fucking chance to show I am making a come back?
I am on suboxone; so to my mother and father, I am far from sober, and when certain things come out of my mouth, its the "suboxone talking".
I shot 1-2G's of heroin a day; the 12MG of bupe I take daily barely does a thing.
sometime I just cant talk it; which is why this rant is here.
if I even had the money or connection to get dope right now, it would be in my arm in about 20 minutes. luckily, things have changed and I cant even.
yes, I am a raging heroin addict w/ multiple overdoses and 2 DUI's and a million other things, but I have finally come around and have found a reason to live, do well, and go forward w/ life. I am in the final stages of getting my license back, saved up close to 10k to buy a car out right and then put all the money toward insurance and getting it on the road.
but what do I still get!? I get.. "your voice sounds different". "you've been acting different the last 2 weeks". "I really doubt you would pass a drug test right now". and a million more other things to the point where I threw a punch threw my fathers van and he blames "drug use" as to why I would be mad and punch.
yes, wrong thing to do, but he and I been battling for years.. years and years before drugs even started.
that was weeks ago, but today I got it more and more.. seriously, how do you handle this? yes, its my fault because I was the fucking super junkie for the past 12yrs w/ jail time, multiple programs and detoxes, multiple DUI's and totaled cars, etc. yes, I fucked up BIG TIME! but when do I get a fucking chance to show I am making a come back?
I am on suboxone; so to my mother and father, I am far from sober, and when certain things come out of my mouth, its the "suboxone talking".
I shot 1-2G's of heroin a day; the 12MG of bupe I take daily barely does a thing.
sometime I just cant talk it; which is why this rant is here.
if I even had the money or connection to get dope right now, it would be in my arm in about 20 minutes. luckily, things have changed and I cant even.
