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Sober 96 Days BORED to Death....

cire113

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Aug 17, 2004
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I've bee off methadone poison for 96 days and I am still really really suffering from terrible boredome and anhedonia ; it feels like my soul is missing ;

I am doing a lot better than the first 60 days but this is just becoming absurdly ridiculous ...

How much pain and suffering must I feel before I change and do something different ?

Maybe I should start going to NA meetings seriously fml
 
The fellowship decision is up to you.

Are you living a boring life? If so where can real excitement be found, because active drug addiction is hella boring.

Make sure you don't forget the misery you have broken away from. Memory is placid and addiction wields it.

So who are you and what do you want to do... there is a huge blue ball and you can do whatever you want...=D
 
It does Cire. I had also taken a greater sum of time for me to start exercising seriously, like every week 4 times. This will make you feel better. The joy itself could only last a couple of hours but you'll start to feel you'll be able to have some sort of satisfaction back and that changes everything. I started in between 3 to five months. Missed some of the 'classes' but persisted and it worked.

Hobbies, anything that may take out of the house and distract yourself. It could be movies, dating, reading, travelling etc. You'll find something you used to like. I remembered I used to really like building small 'revell' airplanes and painting them was very fun tons of years ago, now I try doing that with my son.

Are you planning you thinking about getting into a relationship. That has also been a good thing for most people, finding a good friend, dating. Or simply going out. Don't go to bars or clubs -- try open spaces, parks, gym, shopping. Do a brainstorm with what would you like to be doing now and find something you enjoy doing. I know it's not that easy and we are all weared out but remember that now the more you think about your quitting process more difficult it is to start.

Choose something simple and establish a goal for the week. Even you have start by walking around the block or getting some sun, changing your eating habits. We all know you are strong, now it's time to relax and avoid this normal lethargic phase we have sometimes. Don't let it be fed by not doing anything about it. You should be physically okay now, so one day at a time! And baby steps. :)
 
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Do whatever it takes not to relapse. Find something that marginally interests you and put in action. Passion follows. Passion + Action = Purpose in life I know it's not easy but remember this is the formula. We have to put in action. If we look inward too much it becomes pathologic. We have start looking outward. Do you exercise at least?
 
Meetings and support groups help me a lot. I learned that you can only take one day at a time and over time it gets easier....There is also some things that our counselor tells us that i disagree on, and that is ok.... I wish you the best in your recovery. Stay positive and believe in yourself...
 
cire that's a wonderful achievement!! methadone is disgusting stuff, could you imagine being on it for a decade or more, your testosterone totally shut down, no sex life no drive at work no money, you're not forming correct memories, and THEN quitting?? You'd wake up one day and find out you're old, weak and life has passed you by like in the Pink Floyd song. So screw methadone. Don't even think about it!!

We're actually in a pretty similar situation, my vice was oral opium which has about the same half-life of methadone, if not longer. I quit that CT 27 days ago, but have been taking Kratom for later parts of the WD after I couldn't sleep for days and days. Just took my last dose of krat so I'll be in WD again this weekend:( But it's for the best.

As for the anhedonia, yup we're on the same page. Had a major career success and it barely touched me. I still went through the motions of being happy for the benefit of others, and doing that actually helped immensely. As does reading jokes. Maybe it would help if you told us what your hobbies are?
 
Thanks for the advice guys; I'm doing better today I think I was really frustrated because I've had the flu all week and it reminds of terrible withdrawal again;

You guys are the best with all your support and love ;

I guess I'll just stay sober and pray things come together ;

My biggest issue is lack of purpose focus or direction in life ; I've got way too much free time not much motivation and just spend most of my days on the Internet doesn't my random things lol

Hopefully I'll be able to figure out the more of what I want to do and get outta life as time goes by; it's difficult fees like I am completely reinventing myself and everything I do......

Fuck it's a roller coaster......

Again thx for all the great advice i pray to god it gets better someone please tell me it does
 
My biggest issue is lack of purpose focus or direction in life ; I've got way too much free time not much motivation and just spend most of my days on the Internet doesn't my random things lol

Hopefully I'll be able to figure out the more of what I want to do and get outta life as time goes by; it's difficult fees like I am completely reinventing myself and everything I do......

You are.. YOU need to find YOU again or for the first time. Its a morals and values exploration. By Morals I mean how do YOU need to act. Not how the church told you.. not how your parents told you.. not how the schools told you, but you may find pieces in all these these places as long as it fits whats right with YOU. How do YOU need to behave to make things right with YOU.

Figure out what YOU value and whats important to YOU. . not what the advertising tries and sells you.. not whats popular or in fashion. not what your friends think.. unless its what YOU value.

Look to your heart. Its the only thing that knows where you need to go and how you need to get there:)
 
NSA i don't even know where to begin to answer those questions :( I've really been struggling with seriously SEVERE depression lately; my head is fucked;

it almost feels like I've forgotten how to live.. :(

thx for all ur support guys; this is miserable
 
It might be like that for a long time. Hang in there.

yeah dude NO JOKE; serious props to you...... how long u got off opiates now?

I Don't have a choice I'm already all in; I've gone way too far to turn back now




Captain miss ya brother *hugs*
 
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i can't tell if he's serious or sarcastic or seriously sarcastic.......

19 months is a long time capn; congrats man... how did you do it? You ever go to support groups or meetings? What has helped you the most during that first 6 mos/year?

How long have you got clean now NSA? i never asked ya or maybe i forgot! and same question for you!
 
Clean of all drugs? 0 days as I have always consumed caffeine throught. But i love this drug and and have clearly had no problem with it.

Nicotine I have been able to give up twice for five months but have been swallowed up both times and am currently addicted. Shit sucks bad.

I crushed opiate addiction jumping from 140 mgpd methadone and 260 mgpd oxy four years come august.

I crushed benzo dependence jumping from 6 mgpd of xan four years come august.

My biggest addiction was IV coke and booze and i have slipped a few times, (<5 nights in seven years) but have done remarkably well
i guess im not super man.. but im very happy and doing great=D

I trip mushrooms like six times a year.
 
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