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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards

So my psychiatrist is giving me a choice between valium, klonopin, and xanax...

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Don't abuse benzos. Benzo withdrawal is much riskier than heroin withdrawal, for example. Do your research.
 
well shit man, if not abusing the benzos left you with enough confidence to get this chicks number,,, that sounds much much better then being high or w/d home alone!

no?!
;)

i have a little brother, and just can not imagine...
but, i would try and live with him still, and experience life that much more.
or i like to think i would hope to try, or, be there with him hoping the same.
 
I just wanted to add, if you're going to abuse them make sure and skip days or else you'll run out early. There is nothing worse than being dependent on benzos and running out early and not being able to get a refill. Hopefully your doctor will be sympathetic if this happens and call the refill in early but you can't rely on that happening, alot of people abuse these drugs and pharmacys and doctors keep a close eye on benzo scripts. Believe me I speak from experience, I was on Xanax for almost 3yrs and I've been on Klonopin for over a year. I've had a seizure from benzo withdrawal and the worst withdrawals I've ever had were all from times when I ran out of my Xanax or Klonopin too early and couldn't get a refill quick enough.

Xanax is definitely the cocaine of benzos and it just makes your anxiety worse in the long run if used daily. Even if you don't have anxiety issues now you probably will if you start to abuse Xanax, it has an extremely short half life and being dependent on it sucks! Heroin was an easier addiction to handle than Xanax for me, that shit is the devil in disguise.
 
sorry to hear about your loss,i cant imagine the pain because i am lucky enough thus far in life not to lose anybody so close to me (heaven forbid the day) i find life hard enough to deal with as it is.

of all the benzos i would go for valium,(imo/ime) it seemed to feel the most euphoric,help feel better about myself in general,lower my inhibitions and i would need to take lower comparative doses (compared to other benzos) for the positives of the drug to last for longer duration.

but i can honestly say it has/did help me but eventually as much as its a cliche....in the end things ended up worse,and for that i sometimes wish i had never discovered benzos.

i wish you had the strength in you to not go down this path but obviously your in a darker place than i can possibly comprehend.

good luck and stay safe.
 
First off, I'm very sorry for your loss it must be very difficult to handle. I can empathize however I don't know what you are going through. That said, taking benzo's the way you're describing WILL ruin your life. I have seen it myself. Ever witnessed a seizure? It's horrifying, especially when you're close to that person and you can't help them. Ever have a seizure, apparently that end is worse. That is what you have to look forward to if you play with that devil. I watch it happen to quite a few friends/acquaintances daily, all day spent looking for a fix. No real life. Just searching, getting, taking and then slurring and unintelligible. It's a sad thing to watch. Guess who will get to watch it first hand, your grieving parents. They just lost a child tragically and they are no doubt running through scenarios of what they could've done differently. I am a parent and I can tell you they are having trouble not blaming themselves. So here's where I'm going to be straight up real. Don't be so damn selfish, it's awful that your brother died but are you really that self centered that the only person's pain you're concerned with is your own? You're really okay with your parents watching you slowly kill yourself after losing one child? Be with your family, use this as a way to help each other be strong because that's what family is about. No one will care about you as much as them. When it comes to bailing you out of jail or even visiting you to keep your spirits up who do you think will do those things? I know for a fact that my parents were the only ones doing those for me and I put them through hell. They just waited for me to die. I've been sober since Nov 3rd 2011 and looking back I can't ever take back what I did and that guilt will never leave. I was awful to them and they were the only ones at the end of the day who still loved me and were behind me. All the while wondering when the day would come when they would get a knock at the door from the police saying I was found dead somewhere. If you listen to any advice heed this, please spare them if not yourself. There are other ways to disperse your pain, anyone can be a drunk or a junkie. Try being something great, channel your pain into beautiful sorrowful artwork, or poetry or whatever hobby you might enjoy. Do not start down this path because it only leads one place and that's a fact point blank. Fear that place.
 
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